Reach
by She Came As Nyan
Summary: My sanity is drifting, I say I'm slowly dying. Won't you please save me from the inevitable. I don't want to fall into that blissful oblivion encompassed with death... I want to fight. I want to live. MadaraxOC, DeidaraxOC. Slight Itachi & SasukexOC Rated for language, sexual references, sexual content and in later chapters, intense violence.
1. Prologue

_**So guys, here is my new story! It's been sitting in my mind and hasn't really had a thick plot… But then, I thought about it and said to myself, "Self, why don't you ask someone, like one of your readers, or favourite authors if you could use one of their OC'S in your story." And I responded to myself "Know what, Self? That's an Epic Idea!" (No the final idea of this story did not really happen like that…I'm not **_**that**_** crazy. Although I did talk to myself a bit…**_

_**In any case! This story is dedicated to Kira-chan (Kirathis-chan) my favourite author and artist. Her character Hikari Okami is a main character in this story, annnnnd Kira-chan plays a big part in helping me along to write this- such as supplying me with ideas and such. She also might make an appearance or two in writing a chapter or so in Hikari's point of view! If you leave a review, be sure to thank Kira-chan! Now, on with your reading!**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own "Naruto" I only own half of the plot of the story and my own original characters of this story. The other half belongs to Kira, as well as her respectful charies. **_

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_**Reach**_

**Prologue**

_Daddy…Daddy don't leave…_

_Mommy doesn't know what she's talking about! …._

_Please don't leave me…. _

_Please…._

_They hate me Daddy…don't leave me with them… please…_

_Uncontrollable pleas left childish lips. Words went unnoticed. Footsteps got closer to the door. She was yelling again. Forcing him out. He was complying._

_Her body rocked uncontrollably underneath the table. She watched him go. She cried for him to stay. She begged. Let her words fall upon deaf ears before she broke down. She was too young to understand this pain. She wasn't supposed to know what this longing feeling, this empty feeling inside of her was. It was never supposed to be there. Ever._

_Rivulets of salt water flowed in careless, unmarked paths down blush stained cheeks. Eyes that were normally a silver and magenta changed to an electrifying green, and a sort of hatred grew deep with in her._

_Daddy…Daddy don't leave…_

Gasping for air.

_Why can't I breathe?_

Scared eyes shifting back and forth. What was wrong with the picture? She couldn't figure out why everything seemed wrong.

Silvery Pink eyes shot open, fear lacing every expression mustered. Frail arms tried to push off the ground, tried to pull the tiny body from the cold wet ground but nothing happened. There was will, but there was no way…No way to lift herself up.

Shivers.

_So cold….So so cold…_

He left her to question her existence. Every night spent out under the stars, she wondered why nobody came to find her, why nobody cared.

A snapped twig.

_Please…Please find me…Please…_

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_**So I know that this prologue was short, but have no worries, things will get better!**_

_**Please feel free to review!**_

_**Thank you!**_

_**Love Always,**_

_**Luna-chan **_


	2. Still Doll

_**Disclaimer: Still not owning anything with Naruto… Just half the plot and half the OCs. The other half belongs to Kira-chan.**_

_**READ ON BIZNITCHES!**_

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**Chapter 1 **

**Still Doll**

"I want her here." He sounded like a spoiled child, but that was to be expected of him. He always got what he wanted, no matter what, but this time, his subordinate was a bit sketchy on the entire idea.

He wasn't sure if his superior had gone crazy or not. After all, she looked so… _plain._ He growled lowly to himself at the thought of recruiting a useless pet. "What will she do to help us? She's just _too_ normal. There's nothing special about her. At _all_." Malice dripped off his words as he blinked his silver grey eyes, staring back at an orange mask. He couldn't place any emotions, and it bothered him. He wanted to know what had driven _him_ to think that she would be any use.

"She has her qualities, Pein, I can reassure that. She will become the second biggest asset, next to that...Hikari girl we have now. However, you are in no place to argue my choice. You are my subordinate are you not?" A sudden wave of pain shot through the Rinnengan user's body and he bit his lip to hold back a groan laced with agony.

He was a cheap shot. "I know that. I'm just trying too…" Another vicious kick to his stomach was delivered and he leaned on his left arm, coughing.

"I know what is best for this organization, Pein. Call Hikari and Deidara in. We're going on a mission to find her~" The deep voice faded into a more…childish tone at the mention of a mission, causing Pein to wince. He hated him. He hated everything about him… but he had given him the life he had now… the power he seemed to hold over all others.

However, he couldn't refuse, no matter how badly he wanted to. He closed his eyes, sending a sort of message to the two mentioned Akatsuki and no sooner had he done so, the two burst through the door, a blonde throwing his hands up towards the sky in defeat.

"Fiiiinnneeee, hmm. We won't take the bird, yeah." Aqua blue eyes rolled and soon they averted to the silver eyed man. "Whatdya need us for Leader-sama, hmm?" He questioned, throwing an arm haphazardly around the shoulders of the white haired girl besides him. She very softly maneuvered his arm, so it fell limply to his side, and then she looked towards their leader.

"You, Hikari, and Tobi…" At the mention of his name, the orange masked man ran from the shadows, throwing his arms around the woman tightly. She stumbled a bit from the impact, softly patting his head.

"Hiiiiikkaaaaa-chaaaaaaaann!" The childish voice rung out hitting the cement walls with an obnoxious echo. Pein cleared his throat to gain everyone's attention again, in turn drawing the blonde's glare away from Tobi and Hikari.

"You all are being assigned to recruit a girl by the name of Tsuki Miyoko. Her description is in this scroll, and she was last registered as a Konohagakure citizen, although from a reliable source it is said that she's been missing. Search the outskirts of the village, she couldn't have gotten far. Bring her back by any means."

Pein felt the glare coming from Tobi so he added, quite lazily, "Don't forget to bring her back alive." A short nod came from the three before him, and he waved his hand. "Dismissed."

The blond exited their leader's office room in a rather bored manner, holding his hands behind his head, slowly making his way towards the entrance of the Akatsuki hideout. He wasn't really so sure why they needed a new member, they had quite enough as it was, and he hoped to god that this Tsuki wouldn't be obnoxious like Tobi… or overly religious and foul mouthed like Hidan… In all honesty, he kinda hoped that she wasn't like anyone in the hideout at all. Except for Hikari…No, he only wanted one Hikari. The one Hikari that made him feel things he had never felt before. He didn't want anyone else to _mimic_ her. _Ever._

"Hiiiiikaaa-chaaaan." That obnoxious voice hit his ears again, and he wanted to strangle the stupid masked ninja. Really, who gave him the right to call _his _Hikari, Hika-chan? A sigh escaped his lips when he heard her answer the childish man.

"Yes, Tobi-kun?" He jumped quickly in front of Hikari, holding his hands out in front of his frame to keep her from walking any further. She cocked her head to the side, not in the slightest bit interested, but she played along none the less. Her golden amber eyes surveyed the man before her, as he began waving his hand in front of his face—err mask—in a dismissive manner.

"Tobi forgot. Nevermiiiinddd~" She could feel the sheepish smile in his tone, causing her lips to curve upwards a bit. Regardless of the annoyance factor he held, she couldn't keep a smile from lighting her feature. A scoff came from her left, turning her gaze towards her blonde haired, blue eyed counterpart. He had his arms crossed over his chest, in an annoyed matter, and he was blowing his bangs from his face with a big huff of breath.

"Have I ever told you how…" She paused thinking for the right word, "…childishly you react to Tobi's outbursts?" Hikari noticed how his body stiffened, her goal completed. He had stopped completely, glaring at the white haired kunoichi from behind as she continued walking, her smug grin set firmly in place.

Did she really just say that to… him? _He _was _childish?_ It was pure blasphemy that she would even suggest such a ridiculous notion. He knew he shouldn't take it to heart—that she was just joking—but he hated to even be called something relatively close to childish, _especially_ when his name was used in the same sentence as Tobi, and he was being scolded for his behaviour. Oh no, that wouldn't fly with him one bit.

"Hikari-chan, hmm." She continued walking, whispering to Tobi to pick up the pace as the two of them began a slow speed walk. Eventually they moved to a full out sprint, both watching amused as Deidara chased with difficulty after them. Running was never his forte. He preferred flying over all else, hence his lack in speed. "HIKARI, HMM! TOBI, YEAH! GET BACK HERE, MM!" Hikari only laughed, the sound akin to an angel's song in his ears, and he almost forgot his rage towards the two. _Almost_.

Deidara watched mesmerized by Hikari's figure as she seemed to dance across the branches of the trees—trying to escape him while at the same time heading out too their designated target—a bright warmth, and innocent playfulness igniting in her golden amber eyes that appeared a bit more amber in the sunlight. He hadn't paid any attention to the branch on front of him, nor the rather large puddle of mud below him. As a shinobi, he should have known better!

Hikari turned her head a bit, watching the entire act unfold. She bit back laughter when he ran into the rather thick tree branch with a rather loud SMACK but she let out a fit of giggles when he tumbled—quite ungracefully—into the mud, drenching himself in the brown substance. "Jeez Dei-kun…I knew you…wanted to be black…but I didn't…think you'd…go this damn far!" She managed her carefully chosen words between her bought of laughter, earning another glare from the blond bomber. He stood quickly, a comical look plastered across his face.

"Hiiiikkkaaa-chaaaaannn! Sempai looks like he just took a bath in horse…AGGGGGGGGGHHHH! TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!" The orange masked man shouted, his fate doomed as he was blown far into the forest by one expertly shot bomb in the shape of an owl. Deidara began to mumble nothings incoherently under his breath, scowling all the while whilst Hikari gently hopped from her position on a rather high branch, next to him.

"You could have just gotten a tan, Dei-kun." She teased, the innocent playful look returning to her eyes, now appearing more golden with lack of direct sunlight. Deidara seemed lost in his thoughts as he stared into her eyes, the same eyes that he had adoured… the same eyes that he had tried to capture in a coloured sculpture but simply couldn't, no matter how hard he tried. However, if he was lost, he didn't show it to her, and he responded—with only a five second pause—with a cold calculating glare.

"I don't tan, Hikari-chan, yeah. I don't _want _to be black, un. I like myself just the way I am, hmm." A pouty eyed look fought against a serious look, the serious one winning in the end.

"Fine, fine, Dei-kun, but don't expect me to let you live this down." Her index finger poked his nose in an innocent gesture as she returned to their set destination, soon to have the bomber following close behind. He watched with soft eyes the way that she stepped, the way she carried herself. She always seemed so sure…so confident…

"Hikari-chan, let's fly, hmm." She shot him a scared expression. Heights weren't her thing. Granted, at some point she had grown somewhat accustomed to it, but it had been a while, and she was a little more than skeptical about it. Deidara chuckled, holding out his hand as a bird hopped from the mouth in his hand, expanding into a rather large pigeon looking clay sculpture. He held his hand out to her after mounting the bird himself.

"Do you think I'd let you fall, hmm?" It was a rhetorical question. Of course he wouldn't let her fall. He would never dream of it in his entire life! With a shaky grip, Hikari took his hand, mounted the bird, and let a yelp leave her mouth as they suddenly lurched forward and took off into the air.

"Tobi thinks that Deidara and Hikari should look harder. It's getting dark, and Tobi wants to go home." His murmurings went unheard as he realized neither Hikari nor Deidara were near him anymore. He wanted to hurry the process up. He didn't want to stay away from her any longer. Especially now that it was dark. He knew she wouldn't be sane. He knew _it_ would have tried to take over and succeeded, but only because of her frail weak state. He hoped that she would come willingly… or at least without a huge fight. He didn't want to harm her in anyway.

He obsessed over the setting sun, frantically searching the forest surrounding him- although his mannerisms were over looked being as he—or rather, Tobi—was always so frantic in the way he carried himself. He had watched the two others earlier agitated by their slow movements, and he had almost snapped. They took this as something so light, something _unimportant_. The word burned him hard.

She probably felt unimportant…especially after everyone left her. After her family left her to fend on her own until the afterlife—a life he wasn't about to let her witness.

He felt a sudden spike of chakra, and he darted to the direction he sensed it coming from. Towards the northeast, he made out a wall of smoke and fire, cursing to himself lowly. Had Pein not stated he wanted her back alive? Blowing her to smithereens wasn't exactly going to keep her alive. He wanted her unscathed. 'Tobi dashed towards the scene of the fight, noting the defensive stance Hikari took—although she was never one for fighting, she needed to be alert—the smirk upon Deidara's features—proving he had hit his target—and the hurt, frail malnourished body of a teenage girl no older than seventeen. Hurt struck his heart like a piercing arrow when he realized how much damage making the two of them leave did to her. He knew she wasn't very… mentally stable, but he never thought she would do _that_ to herself. She was so skinny…so weak looking. Her chest stuck out like a sore thumb, and it was a wonder she could stand straight under their weight considering she looked to weigh no more than ninety pounds. He began internally blaming himself, but when saw her fighting skills—despite her condition—some of his guilt faded.

She pounced forwards, aiming to jump into the air toward the one who had assaulted her only moments before, but the blonde haired male only smiled wider, holding his hands out in front of him as tiny clay spiders spewed from the mouths in his hands, creating beautiful explosions of bright orange, red and yellow. 'Tobi' watched her moves closely. Watched as she dodged the explosions easily. He smirked under his mask, and watched every gentle twitch of her muscles when she moved—although they were barely noticeable.

He was too absorbed in her frame, too focused on her frail body, to notice that Hikari had thrown a kunai—meant to only throw her off balance—that landed in her collarbone.

Hikari let out a breath that sounded like a cross between disbelief and a worried gasp. She hadn't meant to hurt her. She just wanted to throw her off a bit…"Deidara!" She called his name to keep him from attacking any further. She had noticed the girl was weak to begin with, sickly and unhealthy, and that if she were to fight back, it wouldn't take long to tire her out. With cautious steps, the white haired kunoichi made her way towards the whimpering girl. She say scars all over her body, carving words that were etched forever—expressing the hatred she held for herself. Her eyes stayed closed tightly as she curled into herself, the joints of her bones protruding from lack of real 'meat' on her body.

The sight before her actually bothered her a bit. No blood came from the wound that she had inflicted, just a tiny rivulet of red that stained the girls paled skin.

'Tobi' remembered her to be more tan…with a soft pink blush always coating her cheeks…

"Is Tsuuu-Tsuuu dead?" He mused, tilting his head. Hikari shot a hard glance in his direction quickly. She knew he was…kiddish, and probably didn't have a real grasp on the severity of the situation, but it bothered her that he took it so loosely.

"You've already given her a nickname, hmm?" Deidara scoffed for the second time and leaned over the girl to get a closer look. 'Tobi nearly growled when the young shinobi touched his finger to the quaking girl's cheek. His hand drew back immediately, as he looked up at Hikari solemnly. "She's burning up, yeah. It's no wonder though, she doesn't look like her body could fight off any sickness, hmm."

She nodded. She'd take care of her, it was her job. She'd make sure that the younger girl was fed properly and was nursed back to full health.

Deidara returned to a standing position, and he glanced around the three of them, throwing his arms behind his head again. "So, are we going back?"

"Yes." Hikari responded slowly, reaching down to pick up the frail girl. 'Tobi' watched her closely. She looked so breakable...so fragile as she slept in a semi-induced slumber. To him, she seemed to be a broken porcelain doll—stilled by time until she was awoken by the world around her…

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_**Teeheee, my computer *Instead of putting …"black,*space*un" (I forgot the space between the comma and 'un') it put Blackemon…. So there's a digimon…named Blackemon….IS IT A STEREOTYPICAL BLACK GUY? LIKE MY COUSIN AND UNCLE ARE? HOLY SHIT I WANNA SEE IT!**_

_**Haha but in all seriousness, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**_

_**Please review! Reviews are what keep me going as an author, and they give me inspiration!**_

_**Thank you so much!**_

_**Love Always,**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	3. Lost

_**Fracturing my ankle has to be one of the best things I've done in my life. It leaves me with more time to work on my writing skills and drawing skills :D**_

_**Although it hurts like a bitch -3- Oh well!**_

_**Disclaimer: You know how it goes!**_

_**READ ON! *p.s. This is in Tsuki's POV* **___

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**Chapter 2**

**Lost**

_Stark darkness… deep blackness that never lit up. _

_Why is it so cold?_

There were voices. Faint, barely there voices, but voices all the same. I could almost recall a few of them… They sounded so near…They sounded so familiar…

_Save me…_

Metallic magenta eyes forced themselves to open quickly, as deep ragged breaths were drawn in, trying to make the tightness in my bound chest go away. I wanted to look around, check to see if anyone was there, but I was scared. It was so dark…the only source of light came from a crack in the ceiling of a …_cave?_ Was that where I was? It was hard to tell from what little light had gathered, and I was too weak to get up.

_So weak… So _hungry_…Why?_

I tried to shake my head of any thoughts. Coherent thinking was not in my best interest as of now. I tried to reach a skinny hand to brush back my bangs, but I received no response. I couldn't move… My body was tied to some sort of makeshift bed… if it could even be called that. A sigh passed my dry cracked lips, and I allowed my tongue to pass over them. I could taste the dried blood, and knew that I was due for a bath…most definitely. Perhaps whoever had taken me hostage would provide me with water to do so? After all, if I had captured someone, I wouldn't want to be smelling their disgusting foul stench while I babysat them, making sure they didn't run off. But that was just me.

_Run…_

My thoughts wouldn't shut themselves up. I liked it better when I had been passed out, so as violently as I could, I resorted to smashing my head against the table, trying to receive some sort of negative reaction. Maybe it would knock me out for good? No more waking up after this one, baby. I'm out. That sounded like a pretty good plan. With just one flaw though… I couldn't move my head. Every single piece of my body was pinned with some sort of rope, I wasn't exactly sure what it was, but it was annoying me.

"You're awake." I wanted to scoff but my spunky attitude ran to hide in the deepest corners of my brain where the id monsters would gnaw a little more at it. I shut my eyes tightly, and tensed, whimpering like a scared puppy. I was a bit scared, I wouldn't lie… This guy sounded like he could kill me at any second… I shivered at the thought of the possibility. I had always wished to end it…violently

I suddenly panicked. It hadn't registered that I was in some unknown place completely until just at that moment, and I freaked. I shook with fear, tears flowed freely from my eyes and I cried out weak questions, weak pleas to set me free.

"Where am I? Please…please let me go…" I barely murmured. A cruel, heartless chuckle left the lips of some unknown being and a shiver raked my body. Good lord he…or she sounded so…malicious. I definitely wouldn't be able to tolerate that… Dammit.

_Weak…scared child._

_Another Malicious chuckle…only this time somewhere within the depths of my brain…_

_Why me?_

"Tsuki Miyoko." Right…My name…

I quivered, breathing heavily, trying my hardest not to scream out in fear. That would _not _be a good first impression. I tried to steady myself, attempted to bring some sort of dignity upon myself, but my work was to no avail. I could taste it… The blood… It tasted so sweet… I wanted more…

The red substance started to drip from my lips, and soon, I was coughing up near quarts of the stuff. I heard a name called…Hikami maybe? Or was it Hikari?

I couldn't remember, but it seemed familiar. White hair draped over my torso as the...woman? Yeah, it was a girl... maybe her early twenties? The white hair threw me off. Her hair felt soft when I felt it tickle my exposed stomach. I wanted to touch it… but I was too scared. Too worried that she would yell at me or hit me. I didn't want to be rejected again. Something green began to glow in her fingertips, my blurred vision watching her closely as she moved over my chest—the place where it hurt the most. I thought I could make out something akin to a grimace on her face, but in this state, nothing could ever be sure. More words were whispered—although all I made out from it was 'collapsed' and 'severe'…something about a virus too perhaps.

_Will you look now?_

_Will you save me? _

_Tell me I'll make it…Better yet, tell me I'll make it to heaven or hell._

"Fix her so she's coherent, Hikari." It _was_ Hikari… why did I think I had heard that name before? Ugh. Headache. I didn't _want _to be coherent. I _wanted _to drift away into a peaceful slumber. I _wanted_ to be in a permanent resting place, away from these people—away from the misery that was my entire being. If only I wasn't so weak. If only I wasn't so scared to speak up to people.

She undid my bindings, and god did it feel so good. Tch…that stupid song came into mind making me nearly chuckle. _Reunited and it feeellls sooo good._

_Stop._

_Breathe._

_Or not._

"Tsuki?" I liked her voice. It was soft, gentle…_caring_. I didn't hold the malice of the man. Her touches—gentle butterflies that danced gracefully across my torso to heal all the ruptured organs, all the broken bones—calmed me in ways I didn't know was possible. Slowly, my eyes opened, and I looked up, searching for her eyes. The only time I willingly ever did so. I landed on her lips, noting the gentle curve of her smile when she saw I was conscious. The memory of it was imbedded there forever. I moved up to delicate orbs of a golden hue, and I wanted to smile. My eyes were locked onto hers. I didn't want to look away. She made me feel safe… "Does this hurt?" She pressed a sore spot in my stomach, causing me to hiss. I averted my gaze, shy and scared that she'd get mad at my reaction.

I wish I hadn't looked away.

_Stupid, stupid girl._

_Scared of rejecting gazes meant to burn holes into the very core of your soul._

_Why am I scared?_

_Why won't this pain go away?_

Eyes were everywhere. Cold calculating stares bore holes into my skin. Anxiety itched its way across my form, tempting me to claw at my skin 'til I bled. They were _trying_ to make eye contact…or was that my imagination? I shut my own eyes tightly again. I couldn't take it anymore. They all looked so dominating.

I could still feel them staring at me.

Watching me.

_Judging me._ I cried. I let the tears that were forming flow out from my eyes. Hikari thought it was from pain and I let it pass as that.

"I'm sorry, Tsuki. I'm just trying to heal them the best I can." I nodded. Still terrified, still feeling helpless.

"Hikari, stop." She froze, and stepped back, the warmth she had given me fading as well. The pain came back again, and I whimpered.

_Don't leave me here…_

_Please…save me…find me…_

Flashbacks…pain…mental anguish…

"Tsuki Miyoko. You have been brought here to be recruited as a new member of the Akatsuki." I could feel the tension in his voice—he didn't sound happy that I had been chosen as a…Shit. _I _was _chosen_ to_ join_ the _Akatsuki…_how the hell did that happen? "You will either accept this invitation or be put to death. The choice is yours."

I wanted to say, that there really wasn't much of a choice. Then I thought about it. Death. Something I had been searching for quite some time…

Didn't I want to die after I saw _him_ for a final time? After I figured out why _he_ left me there…

_No, no, no._

_You just want to die. To be sent away to that final place._

I shook my head ridding the thoughts.

"Well?" I nodded quickly. I wanted him to go away. I wanted him to disappear. I just wanted it to be done and over with. I felt a rush of heat. Anger...Hatred…Animosity…All towards me. But why? What did I do wrong? "You will speak when spoken to, now answer me." His voice raised an octave, in return, I curled in on myself, whimpering, shaking like a lost puppy that hadn't been able to find his way home and was now stuck in a dark alleyway—surrounded by the whipping cold wind and the snarling vicious bigger dogs.

That's all this was. A simple metaphor. This wasn't actually happening.

"She won't speak to you, Leader-sama." I knew _that_ voice by heart. I'd know it anywhere. "She has a complex. She'll just nod her head at you. You shouldn't expect anything more." The man who had left me…left me without saying a proper goodbye. Left me and didn't even tell me if he'd be back to save me from myself.

_Itachi Uchiha._

_Cold…Distant…_

_Why did you go? Why did you leave me in the middle of a labyrinth of fear, regret and loathing?_

_Why did you leave me lost? _

I cracked my eyes open when the warmth returned a bit, but shut them justas quickly. Those horrible silvery eyes…so intimidating. So…evil.

_Go away…please…_

"Hikari, take her to the infirmary. Make sure she is fed, and properly cared for. When she's almost fully healed, we'll send her on her first mission to retrieve a scroll with you. Understood?" I felt the vicious aura of the man disappear, and it was replaced with a more pleasant aura—albeit it was a bit tense, but it was the same as the girl from before. The girl that I could trust…Well if only partially.

My eyes peaked open of their own accord, and I caught her curt nod. She seemed as if she loathed taking orders from him—as if, provided given the opportunity, she would kill him on the spot. I could tell it was hard for her to grin and bear it.

_There's no sympathy from someone who can't feel._

_Don't feel hatred towards your master._

_You should know better._

_Stupid girl._

I wanted to rip my eyes out of my head. I wanted to rip off my ears and claw at every bit of my skin until the voices stopped. Why wouldn't they go away? I couldn't take it anymore. What the hell was wrong with me? No matter how hard I willed it away they wouldn't leave me alone. The white noise in my head got louder, ripping a scream from the back of my throat that almost made its way passed my lips. I bit down hard though, covering my ears with my hands, curling into myself as much as I could.

Soft fingertips brushed back matted, stringy hair from pained eyes, and a soft coo left pale pink lips. "Tsuki-chan, I'm gunna take you to the infirmary, that way we can fix you up more, okay?" Half of a nod was all that I could muster, I was so scared. "Can you walk hun?" Hikari watched carefully as I struggled to lift myself from the makeshift table, pain etched onto my features. Everything felt so tense…Everything hurt as if a thousand katanas were being shoved through every single muscle in my body. My lip began to bleed from my biting to hard on it, but I couldn't feel it. That was nothing compared to the searing pain coursing through every fiber of my being.

Quickly I shook my head and fell weakly down, holding back tears, and cries of agony. "That's okay, don't force yourself." She glanced around, her eyes making contact with everyone around us. _How did she do that without feeling anxious, or intimidated by all those calculating glares?_

_She's not weak._

_She's not rejected._

_She's not stupid_

_She's not _you.

I closed my eyes again after realizing that I had opened them, and waited—willing away those voices. "Deidara," did I know him? He sounded as if I had known him…"Will you carry her to the infirmary for me?" I could feel the sweet smile she gave him when he scoffed. Her entire being screamed kindness and appreciation when he walked towards us.

I couldn't detect anything with him…he just seemed…a bit tense…torn between something maybe? I couldn't place it, and I doubted I really wanted to anyways. One eye cracked open a bit, revealing flowing blonde hair.

_Explosions…_

_Hasty attacks, directed to do severe harm to you._

_Airbourne…Clay…Birds._

He had been the one to attack me. The one who had approached me first, kindly, but then turned the entire ordeal into a fight of warm colours and sadistic grins. It wasn't as if I could fight against him now anyway…I was too far gone at this point. Once he had picked me up, my conscious drifted away—something that I was glad for. I hadn't gone so far into limbo that I didn't hear what they were saying, though. I probably ignored most of it, simply because I was too tired to care.

"Thank you, Dei-kun." Hikari murmured considerately, her gaze upon my sleeping form as she led the blonde down a long corridor. "I wouldn't trust anyone else carrying her, and I would have done it myself, if it wasn't for this." Her arm raised a bit revealing a gnarly wound that was bandaged, but bleeding profusely through its bindings. I felt the male's body tense considerably and he made a grunt that seemed worried.

"Where'd that come from, hmm?" He inquired, his focus set solely on her. He was concerned—so much so to the point that I wouldn't doubt if he thought her arm might fall off.

All she did was nod her head at me before opening the door to an austere, white room, laden with necessary medical tools, cabinets filled with jars of herbal mixtures, medicines, and other such medical supplies, and a few hospital beds. Deidara set me down on the first bad rather roughly, earning a curt glare from the white haired kunoichi.

"Careful with her, Dei-kun." She scolded, picking out the different items she would need to fix me up right and proper. "She's fragile." He scoffed again, and I could feel the end of my hospital bed dip with his weight.

"Why should I be careful with someone who hurt you, hmm?" He stopped her when she came to my side, holding her injured arm delicately in his hands. Both he and I noticed her tensing muscles when he held just under the wound on her wrist—he could only imagine the pain on the actual injury itself. "You should worry about this first, yeah. It'll get infected if you don't, hmm." She sighed, a sweet sigh, of slight annoyance, but it seemed as if it was meant more as a brush off.

"I'm fine Deidara. It's just a little…" He was standing now, his body felt really close to hers, and I could hear her breath hitch in her throat. Whether it was from close proximity, or shock, or both, I couldn't tell.

"A little scratch doesn't bleed like that, hmm. Nor does it cause you pain down here, yeah." He squeezed her hand tenderly, making her grimace. I did that to her?

_You destroy everything. _

_You hurt everyone around you._

_You're a monster._

"Let me fix it if you're not going to, hmm. I may not be a medic nin like you, but I can at least rewrap it for you before you tend to her, hmm." He sounded so genuinely concerned for her well being—I stirred on the bed a bit. I wasn't used to hearing such caring words, nor was I used to feeling the amount of compassion he held for her, and yet, I questioned if she realized it.

With a defeated pout, Hikari nodded, holding out her arm to him. "Fine, but only this time, got it?"

"Yeah, yeah Hikari. Whatever you…"

My earsplitting scream interrupted him, and I sat up abruptly, eyes wide, crazed, and scared.

_Where am I? _

_Why do I feel so misplaced?_

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_**So that was chapter 2!**_

_**I hope ya'll enjoyed it… I'm not very happy with how I ended it, but I knew if I didn't, then I'd spoil pretty much all of chapter 3 for you, so I had to.**_

_**I apologize if you didn't like that D:**_

_**Please Review :D**_

_**Love always~**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	4. Hallucinations

_**Heyyy Ya'll!**_

_**Ready for chapter 3? If sooo RAISE YO' MOTHA FUCKIN' HANDS! Haha, Just kidding, you don't have too :D**_

_**I was actually really syked for this chapter! Mostly because I was going to have…well, I won't spoil it yet :D I **_**might **_**tell you in my afterword, but we'll just see :p**_

_**THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR REVIEWS SO FAR! THEY KEEP MY MIND GOING LIKE THE ENERGIZER BUNNY! HENCE WHY I UPDATE SO QUICKERS!**_

_**Disclaimer: You should know it by now luvs :D **_

_**Naruto= Kishimoto**_

_**Plot and OC's= ½ Me + ½ Kira-chan**_

_**READ ON BIZNITCHES! *still Tsuki's POV***_

_**

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**_**Chapter 3**

**Hallucinations.**

_Why are you such a failure? _

_And after everything I did for you?_

_You fail at life._

_You destroy everything and everyone you come in contact with._

_You are a _monster_ through and through._

_Nothing can change you._

_No one will love you._

_You will fall, and no one will even ca~_

Shrill high pitched screams left my lips as I shot up right on the gurney. My eyes opened wide as I stared at a wall. Why wouldn't the noise go away? Why wouldn't it stop?

It seemed as if I didn't even need to take a breath, because the loud screeching sound coming from my chapped lips, red with blood didn't stop once. I held my head in my hands grabbing a hold of my cheeks, digging my nails into the tender skin until I bled. "GO AWAY! WHY WON'T IT GO AWAY?" I cried out, pain wracking my body. Voices made more white noise in my head, like the TV was turned up to loud on a channel that wasn't working. I screamed to battle, I clawed at all the skin that I could get to until I was covered completely in blood.

_Silly little whore._

_I will _never_ leave you alone._

_I'm a part of you._

_To get rid of me, you have to die._

I hadn't noticed the white haired woman trying to get me to calm down. She had tried to coo soft words, tried to tell me to lie back down, but it was all to no avail. I couldn't see the pain etched into her face as I grabbed her forearms, squeezing tightly, making the wound on her arm bleed more. My nails dug into her skin as I shook my head back and forth screaming for it stop. "MAKE IT GO AWAY!" I cried, I wanted to shake her, but I couldn't. Everything suddenly stopped. The voices were gone. The pain was gone. I slowly let go of Hikari's arms, my body slumping down against the gurney gently. Hikari grimaced slightly as she pulled the needle from my arm out softly.

Somewhere inside her head she thanked god that she had kept a spare needle of morphine in her sleeve…Lord only knows why, but still, she was glad that she had. She turned towards Deidara, the blonde bombers eyes slanting into a malicious glare towards me. Even in my unconscious state I could feel it. Burning holes through my skin straight into my soul.

"What the hell was that, un?" He asked through his teeth, slowly running his hands over his ears as if trying to keep them from exploding. "I mean, was it really necessary for her to scream like a fucking banshee, hmm?" Hikari sighed, tired, and pained. No it wasn't necessary, but then again, I _was_ going sort of insane. I'm sure if voices screamed at you telling you how much everything around you hated you, I'm sure you would respond the same way…maybe?

"She's in pain, Dei-kun. I can't blame her, I mean really," Her hand slowly waved over my frail, dead looking body, in a simple gesture, "she's so sick and under nourished. It's a wonder she isn't dead." He didn't seem to be convinced that it was a legitimate reason to act the way I did. I felt his muscles tense when he glared at the newly found cuts on Hikari's arms, along with the profusely bleeding gash from earlier.

"What the fuck, hmm?" He growled lowly under his breath, moving so he was next to Hikari, his hands gently holding her arms so he could inspect the wounds. "She keeps hurting you, hmm. I don't like her, un. At _all, _yeah." The mouths in Deidara's hands gently licked at the smaller cuts on Hikari, seeming to savour in the taste of her blood. I could smell it…Sweet like sugar…

His eyes stared into hers, a soft expression finding his features for the first time in a long time. Deidara watched as her brows creased in frustration…pain. She pulled away from the gaze they held together, and made her way over to some sort of table laden with different antiseptics. She bit down softly on her lip as she cleaned out the small lesions before wrapping her right arm up in bandaging. When it came to her left arm, she quivered, settling for just rewrapping it…again.

"It'll still get infected, hmm. I'm not a medic and I still know that, yeah." Hikari's cheeks filled with heat and she glared at Deidara in a playful manner.

"I know that, but I have other things to work on." Her gaze fell upon my sleeping form and I could hear the blonde growl. It was clear he wasn't fond of the leader's orders for Hikari to take care of me, but he didn't voice any objections. "Let's go make something for her to eat when she wakes, kay?"

I heard a frustrated sigh and mumbled words, then, everything was gone.

Blurred eyesight had always been an enemy of mine that never knew when to just leave the weak alone. My body was aching to sit up and stretch, but I knew if I did so when everything was nothing but blended colours and smudgy shapes, I'd get a severe headache. Not fun, and considering that the voices might come back, I most definitely didn't want to make _that _any worse.

"Is Tsu-Tsu-chan feeling better?" An oddly chipper voice hit my ears, causing me to flinch in a non-to-pleasant manner. A groan left my lips as I blinked a few times, clearing my vision completely. At least that problem was fixed. Now all that was left was the pain in my side and chest. It felt as if my ribs were broken, or rather had been broken, and although they were healing relatively nicely, they still hurt like a bitch. My chest… I wasn't exactly sure what was going on with that but I'm sure Hikari would tell me… where was she anyway?

That's right… there was someone, else here. I glanced towards the left, where I had been certain I had heard the voice. My assumption was correct. Sitting on the gurney beside me with one elbow propped upon a raised knee, was a… man I suppose? He was wearing an orange mask with swirls in it and on the right side, there was a hole, but I couldn't see an eye from my angle. For once…I wasn't scared. I didn't feel as if I needed to look away. Maybe because I couldn't read his expression… so I couldn't see if he was giving me a look of disapproval. Maybe it was because I didn't have to make eye contact with him. He didn't have a very dominating aura either, which was also a plus. He seemed… care-free. I liked it.

"Hiiiiiii Tsu-Tsu!" He sounded as if he was squealing… his demeanor was very childish, another almost calming feature about him. Carefully and with a little bit of pain surging through my nerves, I lifted my arm to scratch the back of my head. My hair felt disgusting. It was matted, and greasy, stringy… ugh. I wanted to shower. _Bad._

Instead of saying 'hi' back, I stared at the man before me, watching as he switched his position so he was sitting cross-legged, with his hands resting gently in his lap. He kinda reminded me of a school girl at a sleep over about to tell her most precious secret.

_He's not who he appears to be._

_Don't be fooled you stupid girl._

_So very stupid._

_Like your fucking mo—_

I closed my eyes tight, pain crawling onto my face as I shoved the voices to the back of my mind. _Go away._ This seemed to catch the attention of the guy, because he immediately jumped to his feet, leaning over me—a bit too close for my liking I might add.

"What's wrong with Tsu-Tsu-can?" He fretted, literally hovering over my with his face—err mask—only inches away from my face. Out of shock, my arms buckled, and I ended up leaning on my elbows, looking up at an expressionless front. No words came out of my mouth. I had nothing to say. Nor did I really want to talk to this stranger. "Tobi wants to help, 'cos Tobi is a good boy!" This boy was odd… he spoke in third person. Confusion fell over me before a wave of pain attacked my ribs. Falling onto my back completely my hands darted down to my middle where my hands gripped tightly at the pained area. Biting back a scream, my metallic coloured eyes followed Tobi's 'gaze' to the afflicted area. "Does it hurt when Tobi does this, Tsu-Tsu-chan?" He pressed softly against the tender skin with gloved fingers, earning a hiss from my lips. I heard the distinct sound of fabric being pulled from skin, then his bare hand pressed against my stomach, this time with a cooling sensation that felt amazing. His fingertips glowed a light blue colour, but in a matter of seconds, it was gone.

Pouting, I moved back into a sitting position, which earned a chuckle from Tobi. "Feel better?" His voice sounded a bit deeper…more menacing…I didn't like that at all, and shivered. Maybe I really was crazy…yeah, that had to be it. "Tobi's glad that it's better now." Yeah. I had definitely gone 'round the bend. Ugh. Great. Kill me now.

_Not a bad idea._

_Die bitch._

_NOW._

I had to bite back a scream and I pressed the heels of my palms into my ears, before hitting my temples with them. Why wouldn't the voices go away? Why wouldn't they fucking leave me the fuck alone?

Footsteps got closer to the infirmary, I heard a feminine voice, along with a male voice, and I placed them as Deidara and Hikari. I didn't want her to inject me with anything again, so I forced my body to calm down.

I took a deep breath in through my lips, letting it out through my nose. My eyes focused on the center of this odd man's mask, and we appeared to be having some sort of stare down. The door to the infirmary swung open, but I didn't avert my gaze. I knew I'd only avoid eye contact with them anyway…well at least the blonde. Hikari, I was certain I could sorta look at her.

The smell of food hit my nose, perking my interest automatically. So much for not looking away from Masky. Tch.

_You can't eat._

_You'll only get sick._

_You're supposed to starve._

_You don't deserve food._

A vicious snarl erupted from my lips, as I bared my teeth to no one in particular. My canines appeared much longer in length than any normal humans, earning a little yelp from Hikari, after my eyes had flashed to an electric blue. No sooner had it happened though, everything was back to normal, and I quickly stared into my lap, embarrassed. What just happened?

"Oi! Don't act like that to someone who brings you food, hmm." The bomber growled at me, and I shrunk into myself, whimpering and nodding.-my way of saying I was sorry. God I was so weak…so fucking scared of everything. Why? It made no sense… I wanted to know why I was so submissive… I hated it!

_Weak._

_Stupid._

_Frail._

_Bitch._

The voices were becoming crueler with each passing second. Soon I wouldn't even be able to stand it. They were going to drive me _crazy._ To the very brink of insanity that would push me over the edge and force me too something stupid.

"Tsuki-chan, are you hungry?" Hikari seemed to completely ignore the fact that I had nearly attacked her. She acted as if I hadn't torn apart her arms. She _accepted _me and _didn't judge_ me. The first person who had made it obvious that she knew that everything I did wasn't on purpose. I had craved that sort of feeling of recognition. It made me feel so ecstatic, and I actually wanted to eat something for the first time in a long time. I allowed a smile to light my lips—a smile that almost touched my eyes—as I looked up into her golden amber orbs and nodded vigourously. She laughed softly. It had to have been the most beautiful sound I had heard.

I could see Deidara admiring her, staring at her lips. He wanted to kiss her. He wanted her to turn around and smile at _him._ I felt bad for him. He seemed as if he had trouble confessing any feelings he had for her. But then again…Hikari looked at him the same way. I saw adoration in her eyes—I heard it in her voice when she spoke to him. She liked him just as much. But to me, it seemed more like she was trying to deny her feelings. As if she didn't believe them.

"We brought you fruit because Hikari said that it was safest for you to eat, hmm." His bored tone made me want to laugh; he was _forcing _himself to be indifferent. He wanted to keep up his 'bad boy' image. Whatever worked for him.

"What would you like?" She brought a tray of different fruits to my bed side, and I stared up at her—eyes wide with excitement. I hadn't had fruit in a _long_ time. I pointed to an apple, not wanting to touch it because I was afraid she would call me rude…or impatient… or something negative for grabbing it. Hikari nodded, and cut up the apple into a few small wedges.

It had just occurred to me as I sat waiting for Hikari, the masked man was gone. It was like he had just vanished into thin air. Perhaps I had just imagined him? That would only prove my insanity, which I didn't really have a problem with. I think the only proof that he had actually existed was the fact that my ribs had no pain in them whatsoever. They felt as if they were completely healed. Strange. I'd have to confirm his existence later.

There was exactly a five second span of time from when Hikari had finished cutting the apple to when I finished every last bit of it. With an astonished look on her face, Hikari stood from the bed next to me and smiled. "Well, now that I've seen you're appetite, I would imagine that you're just as thirsty." She was right. I was absolutely parched. My throat got tighter at the mention of this, making a very dry cough come from my lips. "I'll be right back, Tsuki-chan, then I'll finish feeding you." She gave me a gentle smile, and turned towards the door that Deidara leaned against, his head tilted to one side, giving him a cute appearance to him. He didn't move from his spot though. His eyes, or rather eye—seeing as one was covered by his single side bang—were focused solely on Hikari, along with something on the floor. A piece of white cloth was lying haphazardly on the ground, waiting for her to step on it and fall. And he had the nerve not to warn her! I was too late in opening my mouth though. Right as I parted y lips to speak, she had slipped on the damned item, and she fell, rather ungracefully into the smug Deidara's chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, as if he was trying to steady her, trying to actually catch her, but I knew where he was going with it. Very quickly, he dipped his head down, and brushed his lips very softly against hers. His kiss lasted a few seconds, before he pulled away from a very stunned, and beet red Hikari. His smug smile hadn't left his face, nor had the heat that radiated from his aura.

He enjoyed being so close to her a little too much. I watched as the poor white haired woman touched her fingers to her lips, shock etched in her eyes. She was wondering what had just happened… if it was on purpose or accident. Her cheeks flared, her body heat soared, and the room suddenly felt to warm for me to tolerate. It was quite awkward for me, to say in the least.

"D-Dei-kun." She murmured in her shocked stupor before shaking her head and pushing Deidara away from the door to rush out, flustered. So, maybe that wasn't the exact reaction he had wanted from her—granted it wasn't exactly the most romantic way to take a kiss from someone, nor was it a very romantic place—but he had gotten a reaction none the less.

I had just barely caught a glimpse of her lips moving against his, her body pressing closer to his when it had happened. She wanted it, there was no doubt. I suddenly felt like a perv…watching the two when it happened…analyzing everything that had gone on, noting every detail that had made itself present during the exchange.

_Freak._

_Rejected freak._

_He only did that because he didn't realize you were there._

_You're invisible to him. _

_To everyone._

_You might as well no exist._

Thanks mind. Just what I needed.

* * *

_**Alright guys! So this chapter didn't turn out exactly how I wanted too, and to me, it seemed just a bit rushed. I wanted there to be more body to it -3- but I also wanted to get passed Tsuki being injured, so I kinda just mushed a bunch of stuff together… I'd say, although this might be the longest chapter so far, I think it's my shitiest.**_

_**Oh welllll.**_

_**Please review luvs :D Remember, it helps me write :D**_

_**Love Always~**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	5. Jounetsou

G'day Mates!

_**How's life? Good? **_

_**THAT'S NICE :D**_

_**Haha but seriously, welcome to Chapter 4.**_

_**I know a few certain people were happy with Dei and Hika smooch time *coughcoughkirachancoughcough*!**_

_**Trust me, there will be plenty more where that came from ;p after allllll this isss a ratteeddd MMMMMMMMMM stoooorrrryyyyy**_

_**M fooor sweet swwweeeett maaannncaanddaaayyy smmeexxx annnddd llooovvviiiinnnn XD**_

_**Haha, I'm sorry… It's three o'clock in the morning as I'm doing this, and I haven't slept in four days, so I'm over-tired x3**_

_**This chapter is a filler chapter. After that Little smoochysmoochness I hadda write the after math. :D**_

_**Please enjoy this next chapter that is written in the first few paragraphs Hika's POV, and then it jumps to Dei.**_

_**HAVE FUN!**_

_**Disclaimer: JEZUZ YOU ALREADY FUCKING KNOOOOOWWW :P**_

_**

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**_

**Chapter 4**

**Jounetsou**

My lips were red hot, burning with the desire to kiss him again. He had felt so gentle…his lips were smooth…not chapped as I had expected them to be, simply because of his status as a ninja—I don't exactly know _why_ I tied being a hard core shinobi with chapped lips…I just did. He was the exact opposite of what I expected. There was almost no force in the kiss. It was perfectly passionate and delicate. I had never imagined in my wildest dreams—and let me tell you, I sure as hell had some wild dreams about him—that Deidara would be…no _could_ be a passionate lover. It just didn't fit him. He had always come off as the fleeting fling type of guy, what with his art is fleeting and shit. He seemed more like a one night stand, rough sex, and _no_ kissing kinda dude. Everybody knows you don't kiss someone unless they hold a certain special spot in your heart—because otherwise you're leading them on even more. That's a no-no.

But if that was the case… Why had I kissed him back? Why did I press myself closer—if only slightly. Why did I crave more when he broke away. His touch left a burning sensation on my skin, butterflies dancing across my skin with small sighs of content. I liked being in his arms. Granted, the position wasn't all that comfortable, nor graceful, or romantic, but it felt nice to be in his arms. Tch, what am I _saying_. We're fucking shinobi for Christ's sakes! No emotions. _At all._

We were also only human.

Tempted by desires that run rampant courses through our veins, through our souls causing us to throw away all caution to the wind. Tempted by desires that can either make or break you, and almost always end up being the latter of the two. It makes your vision blurred—your sight temporarily gone for those few moments when you're in the presence of that one weakness. You try your hardest to clear your mind, your thoughts, but there's nothing you can do to stop it. Like a disease with no cure, it will tear you apart bit by bit, until you can't take it anymore. Until you finally break—when the sickness has killed off the last cell in your body. When it ends, you fall apart. You die a little on the inside at first, not realizing the magnitude of the issue, and then you suffer slowly, waiting for that bomb to go off in the back of you subconscious. The sickness seems to go away for a bit… it seems a cure has been found… but it's like cancer. You can never be sure if it's gone for good. The want—the virus—will come back and eat you again. Then you snap. All regrets pushed aside for later. You take what you want again and again, until you're completely satisfied, but even then you want more. So much more.

I had never _ever_ been tempted like that before in my life. I had never wanted someone anymore than I wanted Deidara. I never experienced feelings like I had for him. They weren't acceptable. They needed to go away and stay locked away. It wouldn't be easy—sending that damn sickness into remission—but I had to do it. To protect both Deidara and myself…

The question was…would I have the strength to push him away? Would I have the strength to push my feelings aside.

My fingers were still tracing my lips. I could still feel his breath fanning over my cheeks, making them hot. Making _me_ hot. My heart fluttered. The hair on my arms stood up as a cold draft hit me. I was so..._alert._ It was as if I had just popped a pill of ecstasy. Every part of my body responded to even the most subtle of touches. Fire brewed deep within in me when my hair tickled my skin, causing me to gasp. _What did you do to me Dei-kun?_ My breath was ragged. All I saw was _him. _All I felt was _him._ I could feel his lips pressing against mine again…so softly…

Closing my eyes quickly, and shoving off the wall I had leaned against to regain composure—I shook my head to clear any remaining thoughts. I slowly made my way back to the kitchen where I was to get the glass of water I had forgotten for Tsuki. My legs felt like they had been replaced with putty, but I pressed onwards, trying to ignore it…But dammit it was so hard. It took a little longer than what it should have, to get to the kitchen, and when I arrived, I wish I had just forgotten the drink again. Upon opening the refrigerator, a cold rush of air hit me, and everything last inch of my body reacted with a shuddering I was sure would break a bone or something.

There was no way in hell that I was going to be able to hold back. Even if I tried.

*Deidara's POV*

She was so delicate. It was hard to believe that she had actually kissed me back at all. But it happened, hence the smug smirk etched into my lips. I doubted it would leave anytime soon, so I just let it make a nice home on my face.

Comfortable, buddy? Good.

So, yeah, maybe it was a little cheesy for me to make her fall into me, so I could _steal _a kiss, but in all honesty that's all could think of at the time...and I had been staring at her luscious pale pink lips all day. They had looked so kissable…so soft like the rest of her, and god was her skin soft. Sometimes, I wondered if she was secretly an angel… She was too perfect.

I wanted more of her now. Once she had left the infirmary, I had gone into my room to sit with my back against my window, allowing the cool pane to chill my body. I was so hot all over. Certain areas needed attention, but I wouldn't fulfill their wishes. Not after I had been in such close proximity to my white haired goddess. Doing things myself would definitely not satisfy me in anyway.

I ran a hand through my long blonde locks of hair pulling on a strand lazily. My mind was still refusing to let images of Hikari escape into the stuffy air about me—and now it was just plain annoying. I quickly scanned my room—going over the black walls that had been painted sloppily and in a rush—and landed on the shelf right above my bed, with completed sculptures—my favourite works of art. Every single one of them was carve to perfection and completed. All except for one.

No matter how hard I tried, I could never quite finish it. I had attempted to carve Hikari's beautiful frame numerous times, and no matter how hard I tried, it just wasn't the same. And let me say, I could _not _live with a mediocre version of that gorgeous woman that I had very possibly fallen in love with. No matter how…impossible it seemed, I found myself questioning it every day. I definitely did _not_ want to grow attached like I had to Sasori-no-danna, and yet…without realizing it, I already had.

"This is ridiculous, hmm." I murmured to no one in particular. Standing slowly from the window sill, I took one last glance outside, noting the white haired woman's stressed out look as she made her way agitatedly down the cold wet streets of Amegakure. It looked as if she was heading down to the store…but it was in the opposite direction/ Curious, I decided to say fuck the door, and made my way out the rather high window to follow her.

Yeah, yeah, I know, a little stalker-esque. It was also partially for her safety… there were plenty a creeper who made their ways through alleyways in drunken stupors, waiting for the innocent girl to pass by—with no knowledge of the threat. Hikari was a strong girl—I wouldn't doubt if she was jumped she could handle herself—but sometimes, you couldn't be too sure.

With the urge to catch up to her and question what she was doing, I picked up the pace, my ninja-sandals making a sloshing sound on the wet ground, and occasionally kicking up water where the puddle was large enough for me to do so.

My brain was a muddled mess. I still was unsure what I would tell her—knowing all too well she would question my motive for finding her in this crowd of people—when I noticed something…

She had disappeared.

I had lost her, which was hard to do, considering the fact that I was pretty sure she was the only _young_ woman with white hair… Not to mention the length…Oh how I wished I could run my hair through it every night… how I wished I could wrap my fingers in her hair, to roughly pull her closer into a passionate…

I had to calm down. Getting hard in public wasn't exactly attractive…

Frantically, I began to search for her. _Where could she possibly have gone?_ Panic settled into the depths of my stomach. What if someone had grabbed her? Drugged her even? Sure, she was a medic-nin, but still…

It took me another fifteen minutes to find her. She was in an herb shop—one that I hadn't known existed—with a wicker basket slung carelessly over her forearm. Her normally full hair seemed flat, from being drenched in the rain and pieces stuck to her face that was moist with water as well.

_I bet she'd look just as hot in my shower…Damn she's hot when she's wet… (*snicker*)_

I shook my head. Not _here. _Not _now._ I watched as she brushed stringy strands of her hair behind her ear, and picked up a bundle of…something—I was never good with greenery or plants or any of that—inspecting it with disdain.

I saw her muscles tense and relax. Her brow was pulled tight in a concentrated look. Her defenses were down. She wasn't even paying attention to anything that was going on around her. She definitely was stressed. I could fix that…

No, no, not with sex… tch… you perverts!

Although, not a bad idea at all…

"Hikari-chan, hmm." Her head snapped up, and she grasped at her chest, snapping out of her trance-like state with a jump.

In a sense, it was kinda cute.

"Ohayo, Dei-kun." She muttered through her ragged breath—trying to regain the air she had lost. I loved my name when it came off her lips. The way she said it…AGGH! I wanted her so bad. "What are you doing here?" She glanced up at me through her eyelashes that had water droplets weighing them down, giving her a sort of sexual appeal—not that she needed much help in that area.

"I saw you through my window, hmm. You looked stressed, and I know when you're upset about something, you normally don't pay attention, yeah." I gave her a pointed look, and she blushed, her cheeks burning a bright red. She was embarrassed from before. "I wanted to make sure you were safe, basically, hmm." I saw her eyes soften at this, her muscles relaxed—almost completely—and she smiled that beautiful smile of hers at me.

"Thank you Dei-Dei. I'm glad you came along for the ride. I shouldn't be long; I just need to grab a few things to make as a dietary supplement for Tsuki to eat in between meals. It'll help her gain weight faster, without killing her." I wanted to growl. I didn't like Tsuki one bit. She hurt _my_ Hikari and that didn't sit well with me.

"Can we not talk about Tsuki, hmm? I just wanna talk to you…about you." I tried to sound sincere, because in all honesty, I really did just want to talk about her. "We…can make it like a date, yeah?" I heard her laugh a little, and my heart sunk to the floor…I shouldn't have let it though. I should have known she didn't like me the way I had dreamed she would.

"I wouldn't exactly call herb shopping a romantic date, nor a very appealing one, but if that's what you want, sure." Her eyes seemed to spark a bit, and all her stress seemed to disappear for the rest of the time we spent together.

I didn't expect shopping for four different plants would take a half hour… but then again, for me, it'd probably take four hours—and by that time I would have given up and picked the wrong ones shouting fuck it.

Hikari was different. She took her time, inspecting each of the herbs for certain characteristics, then she very carefully studied the condition of each. If there was even a small little withering leaf, she would put the bundle back, and look for another.

I didn't mind waiting. It was calming to watch her in her own little world. She was so cute when she concentrated, and some of the faces she made, actually made me laugh. I was genuinely happy for the first time in a long time.

I was shocked with my own thoughts, but now, I was too far gone to go back.

"Dei-chan?" She glanced at me through the corner of her eyes, and I nodded in acknowledgment. "About before…" She paused looking up to the sky. The ice cold rain fell onto my face, but I couldn't feel it. My cheeks were to warm with a flush that very well could have boiled the water.

"I'm sorry, hmm. If you didn't li—"

"That's the problem, Deidara. I _loved _it. I don't understand…I mean, I do, but I don't want to believe it." She stopped and stood in front of me, looking into my azure eyes with her own golden orbs. My heart almost stopped for a moment. "We're shinobi, Dei-kun, so why is it that I feel the way I do? You do things to me that I don't even understand, and it bothers me. I love it, but at the same time, I hate it. I want it to go away, but I want more. I know it's wrong, but at this point, I could care less. Dammit Deidara, what the hell did you do to me?

I could only chuckle at her, and snake my hands around her waist, and pull her flush against me. A small yelp left her lips, only to be swallowed with my mouth over hers again.

It felt so right. I didn't care if we were rogue ninja. I didn't care anything but the fact that she felt so good, so right in my arms.

I pulled her closer, if that was possible, deepening the kiss. I felt her breath get ragged, I felt her desperation for an answer—an answer I couldn't give her because I didn't even know myself. Her arms went around my neck, and she tugged me down. I nibbled on her lower lip softly, before slowly pulling away, leaving her breathless. Her eyes were glazed over, she was shocked that I had been so bold, but hell, that was me.

Every thing I did was a bang-explosive. Especially when it came to dealing with my Hikari, and loving her.

* * *

_**Alright guys! **_

_**Soooo did you like the cheesy ending?**_

_**I thought it was cute…**_

_**Like I said before, this was just a filler chapter!**_

_**I was trying to figure out a good way to transition some stuff *'dbeaspoiler!***_

_**In any case, I hope you enjoyed, and I'm sorry it took so long -3-**_

_**Please Review! You know how helpful it is! **_

_**Love Always~**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	6. Hello Alone

_**A'ight guys! So, some unimportant updates!**_

_**School has started again…so! I'm going to try to keep up with updating quickly… or at least relatively quickly.**_

_**Also, I'm going to make a sound track for this story…**_

_**So any ideas for songs is appreciated!**_

_**Thank ya'll!**_

_**Beeteedubs! This is rewritten. The end happened a bit too fast, so I just edited that :D**_

* * *

**Chapter 5**

**Hello Alone**

_I feel so helpless when I'm waiting for your return…_

_When will you be back?_

It was scary being alone in the Akatsuki base without Hikari or Tobi. I felt empty…weak…I refused to leave my room, because in all honesty, I couldn't trust anyone around here, lest I risk the chance of getting raped or murdered. After all, I sure as hell didn't know what these guys were _really_ capable of.

Hikari had moved me into her room shortly after I had healed up pretty nicely, and told me that her home, was my home, and that I could make myself comfortable while she was gone. At the time—god only knows what possessed me to think so—I had thought she meant when she left to go socialize with the other members. I knew for certain that I wouldn't be doing much of that—if at all—but it sure as hell didn't register that she would be going on missions without me. It wasn't her fault she had left me, so I couldn't get mad at her, like I would have with anyone else. Regardless of it, though, I was frightened of being without her. She was the only person I really trusted…aside from Tobi. But he was gone too.

_Silly fucking girl. _

_Haven't you learned that you can't trust _anyone?

_You mean nothing to them. They don't give a shit about you._

My head throbbed, softly urging a groan from my pale purple lips. I hadn't heard from that stupid voice since she left… Damn it all too fucking hell. My head smashed back against the pillow hard, and although there wasn't much brute force when against a pillow, I had hoped it would at least shut the voice up… Like I was smothering it with the fluffy thing, or _something_ of the like.

_You can't kill me, bitch. _

_I've told you plenty of times the only way you can get rid of me is to kill yourself._

So it didn't shut up. Great. I tried to focus on other things. Like how long it had been since my being recruited to the Akatsuki… I think it was two weeks of my being able to function properly. It had taken about a week for me to heal properly, and gain a bit of weight. So roughly three weeks all together.

Huh…almost a month had passed…and nobody had started looking for me. Not that I really expected it, after all, I had no real family…nor any real friends, and I wasn't necessarily living anywhere that people would recognize my disappearance…I guess I was just sorta hoping for some sort of acknowledgment to my existence?

_Once again, stupid girl._

_Nobody cares about you._

_You're invisible to everyone._

"SHUT UP! I'M NOT INVISIBLE! PEOPLE CAN SEE ME! PEOPLE CARE ABOUT ME! I'M NOT ALONE!" I had snapped. I was tired of this… I couldn't take it anymore. But I knew I was only fooling myself—that my words were just fallacies made to reassure myself. I was beginning to create my own world, in which people did care, and people noticed me. Or was I? It could very well be a possibility with this new life as an Akatsuki…Perhaps I was just imagining Hikari caring for me, simply for the fact that she had given me a warm smile. It was very possible. I had done it before.

My fingers—painted a deep pink that looked red as per Hikari's choice—dug into the mass of straw that was my hair, and it was then that I realized I still hadn't taken that shower I wanted… It had slipped my mind, because whenever I did go out, it was raining, my body would get soaked, and for as long as I had lived, that was kinda like my shower. Nature's own personal luxury.

I pulled angrily at the hair on my head till I was sure I would start bleeding before I stood from my bed. I glanced down at the soft white sheets that were a tad mussed up, and pouted. I had OCD. I could _not_ have my bed looking like a hot mess—even if it was just a simple sheet tossed carefully to the side. With shaky hands, I pulled the sheets off the bed, and folded them neatly, before placing them at the foot of the bed. I would wash them before I slept in them again. I recalled Hikari telling me where the laundry room was, but I was definitely not going to go out into the hallway…and walk aimlessly around a place I didn't know—risking bumping into some sex deprived super tall freak, i.e. anyone of the Akatsuki members, save for Itachi…And Tobi… and as much as I hate to admit it, Deidara. Instead, I simply went over to the armoire on the western wall, picking out a t-shirt and a skirt of Hikari's. She had allowed me to borrow some of her clothes until Kakuzu paid me at the end of this week, when she would take me shopping.

Albeit her clothes were a bit too big for me—minus a certain busty area that I wanted to tear off every time I moved—it was still nice not having to wear the same clothes over and over again like I had been used too. The t-shirt I had picked was a plain orange one, and the skirt was a simple black—I felt kinda like Tobi-kun.

A tiny little blush crept onto my cheeks at the thought of the spontaneous hyper active shinobi. We had formed a sort of special bond. He was my best friend—where as Hikari was like my sister. I found him cute in his own way, and as creepy as it sounded, I admit to being sort of attracted to him. He was so mysterious, and yet at the same time so loveable. He gave me bone crushing hugs when I needed them the most without really asking. It was like he knew when I was upset.

I shook my head. Best keep my mind empty for a bit. If I thought too much, the id would come back… That's what I called it. And id monster. Because at the moment, I had no godly idea what the hell it was.

With slow, careful steps, I made my way over to the bathroom that was connected to the bedroom. It had a black red and white theme to it—most like the rest of the Akatsuki hideout—with black and white checkered tiles on the floor and in the shower, red walls, and black marble countertops. The separate bathtub was your typical white tub, built into the ground. Placing my clothes carefully on the sink, I moseyed on to the cabinets on the right side of the bathroom, where Hikari told me she kept towels, wash cloths, spongeys and other such things. I pulled a white towel from there, along with a black wash cloth before turning the water in the shower to as hot as it could go. I was certain a calming hot shower would help to clear my thoughts.

At least I hoped so…

*~*Tobidara's POV*~*

The mission we had been sent on had taken much longer than it should have. In all honesty, I wanted to severely hurt Deidara for taking so long with his 'art'. He had kept me away from my precious Tsu long enough and I wouldn't be surprised if we got back and found her in the same condition she had been _before_ we had saved her. I wouldn't be very happy with that.

Deidara and Hikari were currently taking their sweet ass time, giggling about some inside joke that I couldn't have been more interested in—hence the reason why I had started running as fast as I could to the hideout. I wanted to see her. I wanted to hold her. God I fucking missed her.

It was strange really. I had never truly cared much for anyone before, but here I was, completely absorbed by this girl. Before I forced Pein to make her one of us, I began noticing her more. I had seen her around the Uchiha compound before the massacre, hanging with Itachi, but I never thought much—for the simple fact that she was a child, and I, an adult. Years had passed though and she grew into a beautiful young woman. One that I could not ignore, no matter how many times I tried. I had even noticed that even when she was younger, I would check up on her to make sure she was safe. I had no idea that it would escalate into this. In a sense, I wasn't that bothered by it. I cared about her, and that's all that mattered.

I arrived at the hideout at promptly three o'clock in the afternoon, and as soon I had transported myself to the floor where the rooms were, I ran towards Hikari's, knowing full well that Tsuki would still be there. God I would just throw myself against her and hold her as tight as I could. I shoved the door open quickly, and closed it behind myself just as swiftly, then I turned to face the entire room, noting that Tsuki was nowhere to be seen.

I knew she would _never_ leave the room without me or Hikari, so where was she? I stalked over to the bed, with the sheets taken off, folded neatly on the end. She must've wanted to wash them, but was too scared to leave. A chuckle escaped my lips, and I brushed the tips of my gloved fingers against her bed. Soon, I could have her in my bed, which, mind you, was much larger and much more comfortable. She'd look so… A sudden sound hit my ears, and I snapped my head up, breaking myself from my train of thought. It sounded as if something had fell in the shower—perhaps a bottle of shampoo.

That's where she disappeared too. Smirking I crept closer towards the bathroom door, peeking my head through it a bit. I slowly pulled my mask up so I could commit her body to memory with my sharingan. She was beautiful—and so oblivious to my being there. I watched as she turned her body so her front side was facing me. Her eyes were closed in a peaceful manner, and her mouth was parted ever so slightly as she breathed softly. Her hair stuck idly onto her forehead, draping down over her cheeks, then towards her shoulders where it disappeared down her back. I watched as her face contorted into a pained look—as if someone had severely hurt her, and she dug her nails into her scalp. It had only been a few seconds, but I nearly jumped in and comforted her. I hated seeing her in pain. She was fine in a few seconds though, back to the calm peaceful look she had held before.

I traced every curve of her body with my eyes, starting from the soft outline of her hips—that had begun to grow back in as opposed to the sunken in look they had before—then made my way up her body, over the supple skin of her stomach, my gaze lingering on her velvety looking breasts. I swear to god they were perfect. I had the urge to feel her. To touch her everywhere. I continued watch as she ran her hands along her body slowly, washing off suds from the body wash she had used. The bottle fell again, and I heard her curse softly to herself as she turned and bent over, giving me a full view of her. I smirked more.

I had then noticed that on her lower back, right in the dimples of it, there were four small balls, placed at even distances. _She had more piercings?_ I'd love to experiment and find her others. I closed my eyes slowly, releasing the sharingan, but I refused to take my eyes off of her. At least until Hikari came. She pressed her door open, without hurry, and laughed a bit, before closing the door again. She walked to her dresser and gazed into the mirror, tilting her head a bit.

"Tobi-kun? What are you doing in here?" At this point I had moved so I was sitting on Tsuki's bed, making it look like I hadn't tried anything funny. I knew Hikari's temper wasn't exactly the best when it came to creeping around like that.

"Tobi just wanted to say hi to Tsuki-chan." I jumped from the bed, and darted for the door, acting as childishly as possible. "Will Hika-chan tell Tsu-Tsu that Tobi came here?" She smiled sweetly at me and nodded, pulling her hair up into a ponytail.

"Of course Tobi. I'll see you later, kay?" With a quick nod, I left their room, making a bee-line straight for my room. I wanted to remember Tsuki's body in complete peace.

*~*Tsuki's POV*~*

My shower didn't last nearly as long as I had liked, but it was better than nothing. I heard a few familiar voices—aside from the ones in my head thank god—outside of the bathroom which was what initially made me get out. I really could have stayed all day.

The only thing I caught from the conversation was 'Of course Tobi. I'll see you later.' They were back!

Excitement poured over my body alongside its friend, relief, while my hands worked nimbly to dry off my hair and body. A skirt slid easily over tanned thin legs, hanging loosely on skinny legs, and a t-shirt slipped quickly over a head and upper torso. Small feet pushed themselves and their baggage out of the steamy bathroom—darting as fast as possible to the pale-skinned, white haired Hikari. Slender arms snaked around the waist of the woman, earning a light laugh. Her voice was beautiful.

"I missed you too Tsuki." She cooed softly, lifting her arm up a bit, glancing at me from the corners of her eyes. I nodded vigourously and dug my head into the small of her back. I didn't want to let go. I had missed her so much. "I saw your sheets on your bed. Wanna go wash them?" She pulled me away from her, but it was in a gentle way, and not forceful at all. Once again a nod came from me, as she went to go pick them up from my bed.

Beating her to the chase, I snatched up the bed sheets, running for the door. I had never been so eager to do anything in my life. I had never shown so much emotion.

_Your emotion is just a farce._

_You're not happy at all, stupid, stupid girl._

A growl nearly left my lips, but I swallowed it, calming down in the slightest while waiting for Hikari to come to the door. She glanced in the mirror one last time, then came next to me. "I have to stop at Deidara's room really quick, Tsuki-chan. I hope that doesn't bother you.

Although it was a bit odd to me that the two were spending a lot more time with each other, I couldn't say no. I was scared she'd hit me for not complying with her choice. A shiver ran down my spine in a chilling way, and soon, we were making our way to the blonde haired terrorist's room.

He was shirtless, for god only knows what reason, with a hand resting on the hem of his pants, and the other above his head on the door frame. A glare was sent in my direction, but I didn't catch it. My eyes were gazing down at the sheets in my hands. There was no way in hell I'd look at him. He hated me, for whatever his reasons were. I couldn't face someone who hated me.

Hikari seemed infatuated with him. Her eyes never left his, her smile grew whenever he said her name, her body seemed to tense when he ran his fingers through his hair which in turn flexed his muscles. If I didn't know any better, I'd say the two were dating—just by judging the way they spoke to each other.

She was giving him such a look of adoration…I was jealous.

_Why don't you get rid of him, Girl?_

_You could very easily do so._

I shook my head roughly. Not now. _Please._ I couldn't do that to Hikari. If she loved him, I'd destroy her. I'd lose the only person who cared for me. I'd cause pain that shouldn't exist but out of selfish needs, had come to life. I could be making her biggest fears come to life with the snap of my fingers…but then… she'd turn out like me…I wouldn't wish that on anyone, no matter who it was.

"Tsuki, we're going now. I just wanted to make sure he reported the mission so I wouldn't have to." Her smile was still on her lips. It stretched from ear to ear, her entire body seeming to glow. She radiated happiness, completeness, and pure bliss. She was a whole person, and her other half had to have been Deidara.

"H-Hikari-san… I murmured, taking small baby like steps to fall behind her just a bit. Fear crept to the forefront of my mind, tapping at my skull, waiting to break out, waiting to destroy me.

"Yes?"

I closed my eyes tightly willing the headache away. Couldn't I just talk for once without being shy? Without feeling like I was dying? "Are…Are you and D-Deidara-san…t-together?" My brow scrunched together, my muscles tensed, and a whimper was getting ready to leave my lips—waiting for the strike she was supposed to make. I waited, but it never came. Why not? Wouldn't she have gotten mad at me?

Taking a quick glance at her through my eyelashes, I saw that she was staring at me incredulously. What did I do?

_Please don't hate me…_

"H-how… What makes you think that, Tsuki-chan?" I tilted my head a bit, shrugging my shoulders. Wasn't it obvious? There were so many clues, I mean… I was surprised no one else caught on.

"Well… It's j-just that you're a-always… around him… And th-the way you look at him… I just assumed…" No other words left my lips. I was just too terrified. I could only imagine what she would do to me…

Nothing came though. All the pain that I had expected her to dish out on me never hit. Instead, a sigh left her lips and she ushered me to a tall black door that I supposed led into the laundry room. I would've gotten lost if I tried to go on my own.

Soft golden amber eyes closed sluggishly, before opening again, setting a gentle gaze towards me. Why wasn't she upset?

"I can only tell you if you promise not to tell anyone, Tsuki-chan, and I mean it. No one else can know yet." Was she dense? Of course I wouldn't tell! I barely talked to anyone in general, so what on earth could possibly posses me to want to tell anyone about her and the blonde? Then again…it was hard to trust anyone out her in the first place…understandable I guess.

I nodded, and I noticed her smile softly. Soft fingertips gently ran through the relatively long tresses of black and blonde hair, in a soothing motion. It felt so good…

_Don't trust her, girl._

_She didn't trust you, so why should you trust her, eh?_

_Don't be stupid, girl._

"She does..." The words came out as barely a whisper, nevertheless, Hikari heard it.

"What was that, hun?" Cherry red stained my cheeks as I looked away, shaking my head back and forth. It was so embarrassing! I spoke back to my mind while she was there…I'd be surprised if she didn't think I was crazy. "Alright, well, I'll show you how to use the machine here okay? So if you ever need to use it when I'm not here…" I shot her a look that clearly read 'are you serious', in turn making her laugh a little. "I'm just saying, Tsuki. If you _do_ grow accustomed to this place, I want you to know how to use it."

Getting accustomed to the Akatsuki? The idea sounded a bit out there…but at the same time, it seemed probable. After all, if Hikari could do it…shit, if _Tobi_ could do it, I could…Right?

I had been so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize she had begun the process of using the washing machine—not like I would have paid attention anyway. I was too busy committing the entire room to my memory, just in case I needed to hide anywhere—for god knows what reason—I knew all possible places.

It was a little ridiculous, but that was me. I always had a plan.

_If you always had a plan, please tell me how you managed to get caught by the Akatsuki._

_Your plans must be horrid._

_I wouldn_'t _expect anything more from a stupid child._

Pain etched into my features. I clawed at my scalp mercilessly. I wanted it to go away. Why wouldn't it go away?

I felt as if everything around me was crashing down. I couldn't see straight. My vision blurred then came back again. Numbers flashes before my eyes as if they were some sort of code, but they disappeared just as quickly. A loud ringing wouldn't stop hammering at my skull.

I wanted to scream out, but by the time my lips had parted, it was all gone. Everything had gone away.

Hikari was talking, but I couldn't hear her. It was as if I had gone temporarily deaf. She smiled sweetly at me, her hand motioning for me to follow her into the hallway. All I could muster was a scared expression. I felt pathetic, but there was nothing I could do. Soft pale fingers reached out like a lifeline, trying hard to pull me from the well that was going to drown me in insanity. She was trying to save me without even thinking about it.

"Hik-kari…" Her name fell from my lips in barely a whisper but she heard me. Kneeling down next to me, she gently pushed back my hair to feel my forehead. On instinct, I flinched back—but she wouldn't have that. Cold skin pressed against a warm forehead, the back of a skinny hand slowly feeling different areas of a scared face in an attempt to tell if a fever was running rampant. I wouldn't doubt it. I always got sick.

"Tsuki-chan, you're feeling just a bit warm. I think you should go lay down, and I'll go get you something to drink along with some medicine okay?" She pulled me to my feet, but all I could do was look up at her._ How old is she?_ The question appeared out of nowhere, so I pushed it aside for later. It wasn't very important, after all.

Finally I nodded. I hoped none of the other Akatsuki would be in the hallway on our way back. Stupid headache was getting worse, and that wasn't something I'd want to fight with when dealing with another member.

With slow steps, Hikari led me out of the laundry room, and started to walk down the hall, her fingertips lightly trailing along one of the walls. It was icy to the touch, but refreshing at the same time. I soon followed suit, with the exception that I had leaned the entire left side of my body against it. I supposed doing so helped with the oncoming fever, because my strength started to return to me—if only just a tiny bit.

I hadn't realized Hikari had stopped walking—I was too far in my thoughts to realize it—but after walking into her and falling on my backside, I could clearly see hwy. Laying on the floor in somewhat an array of body parts was a certain silver haired Jashinist. His head—located a few feet away from his body was resting right by my foot—was still talking, cursing profanities as if it were ea new language that he had learned to speak fluently.

"Fucking ass! I swear to god Blondie I'm going to fucking kill you! You'll be my next fucking sacrifice to fucking Jashin-sama!" His voice was so close, and it made my headache worse. So much for no other Akatsuki… "Oi! Hikari! New Bitch! Why are you just fucking standing there? Do something you stupid fucking cunts!" His harsh words didn't seem to phase Hikari, as she only stepped away to search for the cause of the problem—Deidara—but they hit me like a brick. What was I supposed to do? I didn't know much medical ninjustsu, and there was no way in hell that I was going to fix this…mess. I was worthless again… I couldn't do anything to help…

_Just like how you couldn't help your parents?_

_Your _sister_. _

_You couldn't help anyone if you…_

Hidan's obnoxious voice killed the even more infuriating one in my head. "Hey, Tsuki, was it? Nice fucking panties! I didn't know you were a fucking thong girl? I would've fucking figured you were too fucking young for that kinda shit!" His laughter made my cheeks turn pink…no…bright red. He'd looked up my skirt! And he yelled out what kinda underwear I was wearing! Can you say embarrassment?

I heard angry footsteps over the sound of his laughter. Angry footsteps that made an echoing through the hall, followed by another set of footsteps that seemed less upset. Words were spoken in hushed tones, until the figure of Hikari came into view—Deidara nearly right behind her.

She was fuming. Her eyes held rage and no remorse for what she was going to do to him. "WHAT HAVE I TOLD OYU ABOUT HITTING ON MINOURS? AND TSUKI NONE THE LESS?" She growled out to him—or rather his head. She was definitely a force to be reckoned with. For those of you wondering, this had sort of happened before, when I was first conscious, Hidan had questioned if I was a whore or not—I couldn't quite place why he asked the question… Either way, Hikari had sent a powerful kick to the groin area—not pleasant at all.

You would think he would learn his lesson, right?

Wrong.

"Oi! It's not my fucking fault that this slut is fucking walking around inna short ass fucking skirt showing off her fucking shit with slutty ass panties! I mean really!" More heat rushed to my cheeks. I wanted him to just stop shouting out my business… please?

Hikari's aura suddenly burst into flames as pure ire radiated from her skin. Was she really going to do what I think she was…

Her chakra shot down to her left leg as she readied herself for a powerful kick, and Hidan felt it just as much as everyone else.

"HEY! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GUNNA FUCKING…" Hikari kicked his head as far as she possibly could—all th way to the other end of the hallway—which was rather far—and smirked.

It was a perfect punt. That'd beat any football player's kick any day! Woo! Field goal for the home team! Let's goooooo!

Her lips curved upwards in a smile when there was a faint "thump" from where Hidan had hit hard.

"Alright, now that _that_ is done…"

I stopped listening. Not to be rude, but simply to observe Hikari, and her blonde counterpart who I had almost forgotten was there. He was staring at her again, with a serious look of lust in his eyes. He scanned up and down her body slowly before reaching out a mouthed hand to rest gently on her waist. She didn't jump when his tongue hit her skin, but she sure did tense up a lot.

"Hik-kari-chan…you and-d-D-Dei-dara _are_ dat-ting…aren't you?" The blonde's ocean blue eyes shot to glare in my direction as he gripped Hikari's waist tight. He seemed to ignore the fact that Hikari was there… He ignored the fact the Kakuzu was walking down the hall holding Hidan's cursing head towards us to retrieve the rest of his body.

Deidara tensed more, growling lowly. I wished I was invisible. I wanted to disappear… Go away…Go awa—

"HOW THE FUCK DOES SHE KNOW?"

* * *

_**So... there's that Chapter. It took me a few days… and then my computer had a suicide attempt… AND DELETED EVERYTHING I HAD WRITTEN! FOURTEEN PAGES OF GOODNESS LOST!**_

_**I rewrote it, but there's still a lot that happened that I didn't put in this chapter, so it's going to go in the next one. I just wanted to post this for you guys, because Exam week is this week, and I probably won't be able to update. I'm going to try, but you might not get anything 'til Saturday, or Sunday. Either way, I hope that this was good enough**_

_**I promise I'll make it up to you guys in the next chapter!**_

_**Remember, Reviews please! 3**_

_**Love always~**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	7. Sharkzilla!

_**WOOOT! CHAPTER SIXX IS OUTTT!**_

_**Itachi: Could you be any more obnoxious about it?**_

…_**Yes…YES I COULD! *Gets out my pots and pans and begins to play them like drums, singing in a tone similar too "Spider Pig* CHAPPTERRRR SIXXXXX CHAPTER SIIIXXXX THE BESTEST STORY IS UPDATE-ED!**_

_**Itachi: …*shakes his head slowly* I am Disappoint.**_

_**Pssh Itachi you can't do that! *Ahemm!***_

_**Anywayyy, Here's chapter six for you guys… I don't have much to say nao except that the POV'S switch between Hikari and Tsuki a few times, so maybe in the afterthought! :D TAKE IT AWAY ITA-KUN!**_

_**Itachi: Luna-chan doesn't own me…or Naruto for that matter. She only owns half of this story. The other half belongs to her friend Kira-chan. Please Enjoy.**_

* * *

**Chapter 6**

_**SHARKZILLA!**_

He was stupid. Extremely dense beyond any natural comprehension of the word. I swear to god I was going to make him pay. Of all the stupidest things he could've said in response to that, he had to yell out, 'How does she know?' Like really Deidara? Grow up and deal with it. I had no problem with it. After all, who was she going to tell?

I shot an angry glare in his direction, and pulled the shaking girl close to me. She was terrified of Deidara, of _all_ people to be scared of. But I had to make her feel comfortable. We were similar…in some way shape or form. I knew how it felt to be scared of all these S-ranked rogue shinobi—granted Deidara wasn't one of them, but still. I understood her.

"Could you be any louder Deidara?" I growled out lowly, pushing Tsuki down the hallway back to our room. He followed nonetheless mumbling incoherent curses as my shy little friend tried to run down to our room. Unfortunately, nothing in life was that simple. Standing in her way was one of the zombie twins completely intact, and the head of the other in his hand. Curses were directed towards anyone in the way followed by an agitated sigh.

"Oi! Blondie! What does the fucking slut know that we don't?" Had Kakuzu not been holding his damned head, I most definitely would have punted his ass again! It was no one of his business, and it wasn't his place to be calling people names! Goooodddddd this man made me want to _hurt_ people!

Cerulean blue eyes scanned the uninterested red and green eyes of the taller male in front before a scoff left soft lips. God his lips were soft. I wanted to kiss them again. So badly. Tsuki was there though, and I was certain she would feel a bit awkward with that going on near her.

"Nothing, Hidan, hmm." He growled under his breath. It was obvious that he knew he was fucked. Hidan wouldn't shut up about it, and that was going to be a problem.

~*~*~Tsuki's POV~*~*~

He wasn't…dead. His head was detached from his body and yet he…he wasn't dead. How on earth was that possible? I glanced up towards Hikari for some kind of confirmation that it very well could have been a hoax—a simple trick of my eye, and he had just very simply hid inside the scary mans cloak.

That sounded more logical to me than a talking head, but then again, whoever said that my logic was right, or even remotely rational to begin with.

_You've always been a bad judge of things, girl._

_Your rationality was never even there. _

_Why do you think you were hurt so much, hmm?_

_Because you trusted the wrong people. Peopl_e you_ rationalized to be safe when they weren't._

Breathe.

Close your eyes.

Will it all to go away.

Demon, demon go away, don't come again another day…

A pause…Silence…

_I'm still here you dim-witted slut._

Wonderful. Just wonderful. I pushed him away—I had come to the conclusion that the voice inside my head was male, just cos it sounded like one—and continued my gaze to the older kunoichi. Stress lay present on the crease in her brow as she furrowed it in the direction of the Scary man and Hidan. Her eyes slanted ever so slightly when a profanity slipped from his large mouth, and her grip on my shoulder tightened a bit when he called me a slut.

To tell the truth—I wasn't a big fan of the word. At all.

"Hidan, do you _want _me to destroy you?" She got a scoff as a response, soon to be followed by more swears—declarations of impending mutilation and death. I'd like to see him try to hurt her!  
…Not that I would really do anything to stop it… I would be to scared…

_Blood everywhere._

_Moans of anguish reverberating from walls of concrete._

_Dead bodies strewn mercilessly on the streets in a small simple safe price to atone for sins never committed._

_Screams._

_An irony smell in the air, soon followed by the stench of rotting flesh._

_Save them…Save them…_

The tears started flowing. I hadn't even time to react to stop them. I didn't even feel them because I felt so numb. What _was_ that?

Nobody noticed… Nobody saw the pain in my eyes; nobody heard the soft barely there sobs that left my pale lips. I didn't expect anyone to…but that didn't mean I wasn't hoping for someone to reach out to me.

It didn't take long for the bickering between the four older Akatsuki to end, and by that time, my crying had ceased. I had no recollection of tears ever leaving my eyes, nor any memory of what could have caused me to cry in the first place. Things were better like that. I liked being in my trance like state that made me numb to everything around me. Made me forget things that were much better left behind. I could live a life I didn't know existed, fully aware of missing pieces—but unsure if those pieces were even there, and be perfectly okay with it. I _loved _that.

Soft fingers running through the tresses of my hair drew me from my daze, snapping me back to reality with a jolt.

A gentle chuckle, warm digits gently brushing back a stray strand of hair from my cheek, a soft smile…

"Tsuki-chan, I'll meet you in our room okay sweetheart? I have to… 'talk' to Deidara quickly. I'll be right there okay? Then we'll get you something to eat. You look hungry." As if on cue a growl made itself heard from my abdomen. I heard her laugh again, and I didn't want it to stop. I loved her voice. It soothed me. Don't leave me_,_ I wanted to cry out, but I refrained, simply nodding abruptly before rushing to the bedroom door. I didn't want to encounter anyone else in the hideout on my own. Ever.

~*~*~Hikari's POV~*~*~

I was most definitely going to give that blonde a piece of my mind. Leave him a little..."gift" if you will. I knew how he wanted me, and I was going to use that to my advantage. With him being just a guy, tch, it sure as hell was going to be easy. Pssh, men always thinking with their _head,_ not their head. A small smile lit my features at the thought of this. It was quite true for most people I had known, or seen anyway.

But when I thought about it…I was kinda just as bad as him. I had been noticing that for the past few…whatever many days it had been since his first kiss with me…that I wanted him more and more. But not in an emotional way. I had that now, as he had devoted himself to me, and me alone. I wanted him to fill me. I wanted to feel him against me in nothing a birthday suit—regardless of if it was either of our birthdays, or not. I wanted him to kiss me all over, to whisper sweet nothings into my ear as I cried out in ecstasy from his ministrations that left me breathless, wanting more, screaming for more as everything went numb, and muscles gave out paroxysmic spasms , aching for a relief that wasn't there, but at that one place where we were….

Alright…getting a bit carried away…

I couldn't hold back a snicker.

I glared at the door that was placed two rooms down from mine, and knocked hard and fast. I didn't want to make this long, but at the same time, I didn't want it to end. I wished he'd take his time getting to the door, although I subconsciously begged for him to hurry so I could tackle him to the ground, and press his lips against mine with a force that couldn't be rivaled. That's _exactly_ wh_at _I did too.

No sooner had I seen that long luscious hair had I pounced on him, sending him reeling backwards a bit; not enough to knock him down completely, but enough to push him back almost to the bed. I could feel the smirk that lit his lips as they attacked my neck greedily, nipping and sucking at the sensitive junction between my neck and shoulder. A moan nearly ripped itself from my throat, but I bit back. Not yet.

With my legs around his waist, and arms around his neck, Deidara drew himself closer to the king size, falling onto his back so I was straddling his waist. "I take it you're not mad at me anymore, hmm?" His words came out barely any louder than a husky whisper, his breath hot against my skin sending shivers up my spine. I didn't respond—not only for the fact that I didn't want to, but also because I couldn't speak. I was too into the moment. God I friggin' wanted the bastard.

Not yet, Hikari. Just wait until the time is right. Don't rush into things.

Almost all coherent thinking went down south as his hands rested on my hips after hiking my shirt up a bit, his thumbs drawing lazy circles on my stomach, and the mouths on his hands licking sensually at every inch of skin that they could get to. At this rate…my plan definitely wasn't going to work. I had to focus.

Soft lips pressed against mine in a gentle attempt to coax me to wanting more. Molding passion into each subtle suck of a bottom lip—alternating dominance between dancing tongues—it was pure heaven. Bodies grinded up against each other—shielded by clothes that were slowly being discarded from the male in the situation—creating a beautiful friction that brought heat to the very core of our beings. A soft moan escaped my lips on accident, and he stiffened completely.

His eyes were glazed over with a want that I had known all too well. He attacked my lips again, this time nearly bruising them as he bit roughly, claiming me as his own—making it known that no one else was allowed to kiss me in such away. I belonged to him.

Time to set the plan into motion. My arms loosened from around his neck, hands trailing softly over his shoulders and down his perfectly sculpted chest. I loved how he wasn't jacked, but he wasn't flimsy and weak either. He was just right. Perfect. My fingers lingered on the hem of his boxers when I saw his eyes close. Very slowly—with one last kiss to his lips—I began to nibble my way down to where my hands were. No I wouldn't go any farther than that. I didn't plan on doing anything after that point.

As soon as my teeth bit gently at the skin on his hips, Deidara sucked in a deep breath, and released a growl. He wanted me to do it. It was just too bad that I had no intention of doing such a thing just yet.

"God dammit, Hikari, stop teasing, yeah." He struggled to form a coherent sentence. He struggled to even talk in general. My hands moved closer to his ever growing erection, and right as he thought I was going to touch him…I vanished.

I left him confused, hard and pissed. Heh. Paybacks a bitch.

~*~*~Tsuki's POV~*~*~

I heard a sound from down the hall—something akin to a deep growl and a loud curse followed by Hikari's name—but I couldn't bring myself to check it out. What if Hidan was put back together? What if he took advantage of me? I shivered at the thought.

_I'd bet you'd like it if that Jashinist took your innocence over and over again._

_I bet you want him too._

_Why don't you let him you little slut._

_Filthy whore._

I hadn't realized that I punched the wall in anguish. I hadn't registered the fact that it was solid concrete and I had just punched a hole leading into the room next to ours.

I just imagined it was that stupid voice in my head and winged it. God I would love to take it out and beat it till it couldn't speak anymore. I'd rip out it's throat and watch it pour with blood, watch it try to speak, only causing more blood to spill from the wound, gurgling on his own…

"Tsuuuuki-Chaaann~" Her voice snapped me from the anger that caused me to go into a trance like state. I smiled, bounding towards the bedroom door flinging it open to see her smiling as brightly as the sun that I hadn't seen in weeks. Her happiness gave me happiness. "Are you ready to go get something to eat?" A fierce nod was supplied and we dashed towards the kitchen.

It was a friendly race that she ended up winning—but it was fun none the less. I felt like a child again…alright so _technically_ I still was a child but like… that five year old kid that I can't remember ever being. We shoved each other, tried to trip each other and laughed as we did so until we burst through the kitchens swinging doors, falling to the ground like idiots.

I swear I had never felt so alive in my life. That was honestly the only time in my life I ever remember having so much fun. It made me feel light…carefree…I loved it.

_Don't expect that to last too long, girl. _

_I doubt it will._

I didn't care. With excited silvery magenta eyes I gazed at Hikari who was currently searching through the refrigerator for something to make me. Had I learned how to cook, I would've been doing it myself, rather than making her do it for me.

Legs that were starting to fill out again pushed a somewhat less frail body from the ground with ease and led me to one of the many chairs at the island connected to a wall, that stretched to separate the kitchen from the dining room—kind of like a bar.

"What would you like to eat hun?" I heard her ask. I had to think for a moment. What _did_ I want?

"Is th-there any seaf-food-d?" I questioned in the smallest voice I had. I was still uncomfortable with talking, after not doing it for so long, I was surprised I could even form sentences.

"Do crab cakes sound good to you, Tsuki-chan? That's the only seafood related thing I have in here." She provided me with a sincere smile that I returned, but it looked more like a half of a smile. I nodded confirming that it was alright. I felt a presence behind me, and my body went rigid in response.

"Care to make me some too, shrimp? I'm hungry as hell!" Hikari's eyes lit up like fireworks at the sound of the voice. So it was a friend of hers? He had to be nice then, which meant that perhaps I shouldn't be scared. I still had no intention of looking at him, but a quick glance would suffice the curiosity that boiled in my veins.

"KISAME! YOU'RE BACK!" She cried out, running towards him at full speed. I followed her movements over to a something large. She jumped into him to give him a hug that would have certainly killed any normal person—but when his arms wrapped back around her I saw…Blue hands?

Upon further inspection I saw the most frightening sight in my life. An eight foot tall man…with blue skin…blue hair…gills—or what appeared to be gills—beady shark like eyes and…good lord he had razour sharp teeth too?

I was terrified. I shook in my seat. Friggin' Sharkzilla was hugging my best friend!

* * *

_**Alright guys. Chapter six, finished.**_

_**I'm sorry it took so long to get posted… D:**_

_***feelslikepoopfortakingsolong***_

_**I will take any punishment you deem necessary for me to atone my actions… Or rather, I will use Itachi as a shield as you guys do what you wish *smiles cheesily***_

_**Itachi: Wha…?**_

_**ANYWAY PLEASE LEAVE REVIEWS!**_

_**Thank you all fro your patience and sticking around!**_

_**Love always~**_

_**Luna-chan**_


	8. I'll Always Make It Better

_**What's this? Is it chapter 7?**_

_**Itachi: Clearly. Last chapter was 6. *Sigh***_

_**Stop being such an emo butt! Annyyywhooooo, We're just gunna role right into the disclaimers, then to the story! TAKE IT AWAY Ita-kun!**_

_**Itachi: Hn. Luna-chan only owns Tsuki and ½ the plot. The other ½ is Kira. Naruto belongs to its respectful man.**_

_**WOOT! LES GOOO!**_

_**

* * *

**_

**_Chapter 7_**

**_I'll always make it better_**

What the hell? It wasn't human. It definitely wasn't human… was it?

There it was…big…blue...and hugging Hikari in a grip that I was sure would kill her…but she was enjoying it!

What sort of masochistic freak enjoyed getting hugged by that?

"KISAME NII-SAN! OHMGEE I MISSED YOU SO FRIGGIN' MUCH!" Hikari squirmed in his grip, her aura brimming with excitement as she held him to her tightly. Nii-san? Were they related? I highly doubted it but…still. I wasn't really sure of anything ever, and sometimes siblings didn't look alike…

I sat awkwardly, watching their reunion with a contemplative look, trying to decipher what the two meant to each other exactly. It didn't take long for me to become distracted. Blinded by a rage that shouldn't have been there. Jealousy coursed through every fiber of my being as he held her close to him in a brotherly manner. Everyone loved her. Save for Hidan, but he didn't really count—seeing as he probably hated everyone. Everyone adoured her for being her. Why couldn't I have that? Why couldn't someone love me the way everyone else loved her. Just one person. That's all I ever wanted. Just that one person who really truly loved me and would never leave. Unlike two certain Uchiha's that I had started to grow to hate ever so slowly. Stupid Sasuke. Stupid Itachi…

Of course, I could never call them stupid to their face. No, that would cause problems I wouldn't even want to _start_ to imagine. Tch, knowing me, I'd run with my tail between my legs if I thought of saying that to _anyone's_ face—let alone those Uchiha brothers.

_So weak…_

_So vulnerable…_

_So ignorant._

"Missed you too, shrimp." It's…or rather, _his_ voice brought me out of my thoughts, dragged me away from the feeling of wanting to bang my head viciously against the counter because of that resonance in my head. "So how about it? You gunna make me some of those crab cakes? I'm starving. I haven't really eaten much since I left, save for maybe some dango at a café that Itachi stopped at. Y'know how he gets about his tea…" A deep snicker left the lips of Kisame, as he gently placed down Hikari…It was weird how such a large man could be so gentle…

She nodded swiftly, and bounced back to the kitchen where she had been previously working, a new vigour found in the way she moved. It lightened my heart to see her so happy…and yet…it made my heart twist in agony for her life. It made my body ache to be in her place, to know what it was like to be so carefree once again. All that could run through my head was, _why?_ Why was she able to live a life I wanted? Why was she able to be so happy? What the hell did she do so right that I hadn't?

I took in a shaky breath, trying hard to calm the anger that boiled deep inside of me. Hikari was my friend. She cared about me, just as I cared for her. There was no room for hatred in a relationship like that. She hadn't done anything wrong to deserve me taking out any anger I had out on her—although I was certain that no actions would stray passed my thought process. Even still, I had to focus on something much more calming…

Breathe.

Breathe…

Anxiety crawled up my body, scratching at my skin. Making me think that something was there…something was eating at my flesh. With brisk movements I scratched furiously at my arms, a frustrated and concentrated look on my features. It wouldn't go away. The tight feeling in my chest only got worse. My heart began to pound. I was hyper ventilating…The white noise was back—buzzing in my ear.

_Hmm, hmm, sweetheart,_

_You're sweet blood is spilling over._

_Tell me when you plan on draining all your blood._

_I want to savour in the moment you die. I want to savour in every little bit of pain you endure._

_Keep it up, my little cherub. _

_My little whore._

The possessive nature of the voice did nothing to sway me. I only started mumbling incoherent nothings that nobody _seemed_ to notice. I had hoped that my vision was a reality though, because no sooner had I assumed there was nobody remotely interested in my little episode, I felt a rough, strong hand touch my shoulder—although it felt quite cold—when I thought it would be hot, or clammy.

I tensed again. Everything went rigid. The noise stopped. My mumbling stopped. The itching under my skin faded away.

Cue the panic.

My breathing only hitched in my throat, causing me to choke on something that wasn't even there—to choke on the very air that had ironically kept me alive up until now, when it decided it was gunna be a traitor and just kill me. Less shit to worry about on my part. From the corner of my eye, I say a tiny bit of blue skin.

Panic attack; get ready to have your way with me.

I felt brittle. My chest closed up completely and I started to shiver and shake. The room suddenly felt too hot, the bright light was making me dizzy. I swayed in my chair a bit, but the firm grip on my shoulder held me steady.

Oh no…he was touching me…oh god…the shark man was touching me… Shit….Shit…._SHIT!_

A soft whimper left my paled lips, catching Hikari's attention. She averted her gaze from the crab cakes she had just thawed, towards me, but instead of giving me a worried look, she smiled. I wanted to cry. Why wasn't she motioning to help me? Why was she smiling at my pain?

"Kisame –san~ you're scaring Tsuki-chan!" She called out, waving her finger at him in a sort of disciplinary manner. A hearty laugh erupted from his lips, as he pulled his hand away, that dread that was once there, fading a bit. No, it wasn't completely gone, mostly because he was still looming over me, but it was still better than feeling like my chest was gunna explode all over the walls….

Not a pleasant thought…

A shiver.

More laughter.

A soft apology—well more like gruff, but it was said in a whisper—as if he was trying to keep others from hearing it, not like there was anyone else…

"Sorry there…Tsuki...that's your name right? I'll call yah shorty, kay? You're way shorter that the shrimp over there is." My cheeks flared with heat—I was so embarrassed… and now that itching feeling had started again. I barely heard Hikari mutter a complaint above the static inside my head.

"That's not very polite of you Kisa-nii-san." She murmured, pushing the crab back into the oven to finish off the cooking process.

"What it's true!" His hands flew up defensively. I could "see" them, even though I refused to look up. Stupid fucking Kekkei Genkai…. Stupid being the fucking girl in the family to get _that_ fucking trait… God fuck me over with a fucking spork. Please.

_You and I both know that you don't believe in any god._

_So stop bringing him into your messes. _

_He has nothing to do with them, baka._

A growl formed at the back of my throat, erupting into something more of a vicious snarl when it passed my lips. I could feel Kisame shudder, and it almost brought me satisfaction.

"What the hell was that?" Two sets of eyes settled on me. I was starting to feel self-conscious. I was scared what he would do to me for breaking out and snarling so nastily like that. Oh god, what was he capable of?

"Tsuki-hime has a tendency to snarl when she's fighting with herself." The new voice brought shivers up and down my spine…God please anyone but _him._ That prick that left me alone…left me for dead… "You can tell when she's directing it towards herself, or towards someone else. She appears feral when it's meant for someone else."

I heard a seat creak with the weight of a new body, along with the soft, satisfied sigh that came along with it. The familiar chakra signature hit me. The dark brooding aura fought against my self-loathing one. _Why was he sitting next to me?_

I didn't have a panic attack though… Anxiety didn't rip away at me…

I was just… uncomfortable. I really wanted to talk to Hikari… really wanted to just stare at her, and watch her cook, but I felt too embarrassed to do so in front of these other two Akatsuki.

Warm fingers grasped at my wrist, I flinched on reaction. The fingers never let go, I whimpered as a warning. I didn't like _him_ touching me. I _hated_ it.

"Tsuki-hime, you're bleeding." His voice held no emotion. No tone of concern. Just a state the obvious monotone infliction. The voice that he spoke with when he left me… He didn't care, no matter how many pet names or empty words he used. It made me want to scream…to run away and hide in our room to escape him. Why wouldn't he just leave?

_Girl, don't ignore the Uchiha._

_That's rude._

_Don't be a loutish cunt._

Tears broke the seams of my tightly closed eyes. My body went limp—I wasn't going to struggle against him. He'd get mad at me for being ill-mannered…Kisame would think badly of me…and Hikari…I didn't want to know what Hikari would think of me after acting so boorishly.

"She's bleeding? Where?" I just barely heard the voice laced with worry. I could barely feel the hand that tightened around my wrist—forcing my arm to lift—revealing newly made cuts on them. I didn't hear the gasp of surprise or the rushed footsteps of Hikari as she hurried to my side to inspect them.

The scratches weren't that bad… It's not like if I just let them be I would bleed to death. Regardless, Hikari had made quick work of inspecting them—tilting my arm this way and that with the help of…_Itachi…_ Hearing his name in my mind made me shiver—a negative feeling coursing through my veins.

"How did this happen, Tsuki-chan? I didn't see them be—" Itachi interrupted her, his fingers moving slowly up to the wounds that were starting to sting.

"They're self inflicted. When she gets nervous, anxious or panicky, she digs her nails into her skin. It calms her." Why did he know so damn much about me? Why did he have to answer for me when I didn't want him too? Why was he even giving a rat's ass about telling people so they could help me? He. Didn't. Care.

_Oh, stop being an ungrateful, whiney little bitch._

_He's helping you._

_Be fucking grateful for that._

My eyes clamped closed even tighter. I pushed the mind back. I focused on what Hikari would say to me. What other feelings of disdain...and hatred she would have for me after finding out I did this to myself.

"Tsuki-chan, why didn't you tell me? I would've tried to help so you didn't do this. Did Kisa-nii-san make you feel anxious?"

A hearty chuckle.

A slap to the wrist.

"Don't laugh. You're quite the scary man!" The warm hand finally left my wrist, and I breath I hadn't know I was holding, was released in a loud _whoosh_.

"Kisame, we need to report the mission to leader a success. Let's go." I heard the fish-man groan. Oddly enough, I didn't grow anxious. I was starting to get used to him… no, I was just merely too occupied with worrying about Hikari's reaction.

Somewhere in the kitchen, a buzzer went off, indicating the crab cakes were finished.

"I'll see you later, Hikari-chan. Tsuki-chan. Remember! Save some crab for me!" With that, he was gone.

Hikari and I were alone again.

"Now…can you tell me why you did this, hun?"

* * *

It felt good to get all that stuff off of my chest. It felt even better when Hikari didn't judge me for having stupid irrational fears, or for hearing that cruel, cruel voice in my head. The same voice that wanted to drive me to the brink of suicide.

I never knew that I could have someone listen to me…here me complain about all my problems, and yet, at the same time, not get mad at me for it. She didn't even seem uninterested or angry at me at all. She was only concerned.

But that put an entire new weight onto my shoulders. Hikari cared about me…cared about me being okay, and yet here I was ruining her because she now knew that I could _never_ be okay, that I would always be a wreck who needed constant care. I felt horrible for it.

All the same though, she kept that sweet smile that made me cheerful, if only for the time that it lasted.

With a tired groan, I shifted on the plush bed and stretched my arms above my head. Sleep was starting to take over, but I wasn't feeling it at the moment. It was probably only… four o'clock in the afternoon, so I felt kinda stupid going to bed so early.

Thoughts raced through my mind, making laps on an invisible track in my head. A frustrated look painted my features, but it wasn't enough to cause me to have some sort of little episode.

In all honesty, this was probably the only time when I had been remotely calm…the only time I was able to sit and just think without worrying…without hearing that obnoxious voice in my head. Finally… A nice soothing moment all to myself. I tried to focus on the subtleties around me, like the sounds…the scents…

Soft breathing. The gentle pitter-patter of rain against a window pane. Ahh…the rain… Barely there voices somewhere off in the distance—most likely the villagers below us, bustling around the streets of Amegakure. I focused harder. I wanted to hear _everything_.

I closed my eyes slowly, so my other senses were heightened. The dripping of a broken faucet. Feet passing by the door of my, and Hikari's room. The wind whistling softly from a small crack in the window—because it would never shut quite all the way.

Then those interesting scents. There was mine, a vanilla-y mocha-ish kinda of smell, but then there was Hikari's. It changed day to day—as I had come to notice, and today, it was kinda of like…a forest after it rained…It was earthy, but beautiful…relaxing. I envisioned myself sitting on a boulder, next to a waterfall in the middle of a forest. I pictured the fish that might be swimming about in the river that flowed away from the waterfall. I saw the sun peaking just barely passed the trees branches, laden with bright green leaves. Vegetation was everywhere. Birds chirped in the distance. The waterfall made a dull roar, as if it was distant, even though I was so close. I ran my fingers through the water that rippled the slightest bit, and when it cleared, I saw my reflection. The image of a girl, broken. Scared. Tired. Weak. But behind me, the image of another person began to form. It was blurred at first, as if fading into the moment, but I made out the orange masked "good boy". He leaned close to my ear, his mask slowly lifting up—but I couldn't see any features. It was all smudged together. I felt his breath on my neck. Against my ear, making me hot and bothered.

"Tsu-Tsu-chan," he whispered, his voice deep and sultry, unlike the one I had gotten used to that was high pitched and cute. "Tsu-chan…" His lips touched the curve of my neck, sending shivers up my spine. "Wake up, Tsu-Tsu."

My heart beat in my chest a thousand miles a minute, as I gasped for air, suddenly shooting upwards grasping at my chest. My head hit against something hard, causing me to fall back and groan in pain. "Aggh…" What the…

Sitting above me, rubbing the area where his forehead _should_ be, was that same good boy from the dream…

Tobi leaned forward, straddling my waist—I blushed. In all honesty, it was bad enough that I had just dreamt of him in such a way! But now he was sitting on top of me! With an aura emitting a mischievous air! I closed my eyes again, willing him to get away from me, hoping that it was just my over active imagination. God I felt so embarrassed.

"Tsuki-chan! Is Tsuki-chan okay? Tobi is so sorry! Tobi's a good boy!" He fretted, speaking fast, and it only made my head hurt more.

"It's ok-kay T-Tobi-san. It was j-just a shock-k." I hated my fucking stutter. Stupid hard consonants making it hard for me to speak! I could feel Tobi's smirk from behind his mask, and I suddenly wanted to pull it away, and get a good look of his face. Honestly, what reason could he have for hiding his face? Was he that ugly, or what? Absent mindedly, and forgetting all previous things that had happened, I reached up to touch the corners of his mask. He didn't seem to pull away, he only stared at me—well at least I assumed he was staring at me. I still couldn't tell.

_Do you really want to see his face? _

_Or will you just shy away once you see it?_

_Will you hide and loose another friend you held so close to you?_

_Tch. So Stupid._

I paused. My fingers were curled around the sides, as if I was going to pull it off. The voice had a point… what would I do if he let me take it off? Would I be scared like I was with everyone else? My brows furrowed, and Tobi tilted his head to the side, making my hands turn with him.

"What's wrong Tsu-Tsu-chan?" He asked, bringing one of his gloved hands to cover my own tanned one. He softly rubbed my knuckles with his thumb and his aura suddenly turned worried. "Is Tsu-Tsu-chan in pain? Can Tobi help?" Realizing that I had somebody else fretting over me, I quickly shook my head, and gave a reassuring smile—one that didn't reach my eyes. "Don't lie to Tobi, Tsu-Tsu." We continued to stare at each other.

"T-Tobi-san, I'm f-fine. I p-promise. I was just-t…think-king." He seemed satisfied with the word I said, but he didn't move, or take my hands away from his mask. He only sat there, as if he were savouring in the moment. He let out soft, controlled breaths, and if he wasn't still sitting up, I would've thought he had fallen asleep. "T-tobi-kun." I whispered his name, and he stiffened, if only for a moment.

"Yes, Tsu-Tsu-chan?"

I dropped my left hand from his mask to brush some of my bangs from my silver pink eyes, but he wouldn't let me remove my right hand from his grasp. "Why are you here?" I tried to clear my throat, to raise my voice a bit, but for some reason I couldn't raise it past a whisper. "Lik-ke…what-t made you come h-here?" Tobi sighed, and rocked back on his feels, although his hips were still firmly pressed against mine.

"Tobi can't come see Tsuki-chan?" If I could see his face, I'd definitely assume he was pouting. I shook my head viciously. That's not what I meant! I didn't, mean for him to take it in such a way!

_He's a good actor, I'll give him that._

_And you're gullible enough to follow up with his act._

_Typical._

What did he mean? Tobi wasn't putting up an act! I would know!

"No, no T-tobi-san, you c-can. I'm sorry…"

His free hand reached forward, and he pressed his finger to my lip. "Tsu-Tsu doesn't need to apologize. Tobi knows." I blushed again when he softly ran his finger along the contours of my lips. "Tobi had to come get Tsuki-chan because Leader-sama wants Tobi and Tsuki to go on a mission!" He jumped up from my waist, giving me some room to finally breathe.

With quick motions, he went to grab my backpack, then he started packing some basic necessities—the clothes that I had just washed earlier, my hair brush, a toothbrush with toothpaste and some medical supplies, along with some shuriken and kunai. I knew we wouldn't be stopping much, but still, it didn't hurt to be able to keep my breath nice and fresh and my long hair knot free.

"Tobi packed Tsuki's bag! Now Tobi and Tsuki can leave!" He laughed and pulled me out of the bed, making me stumble a bit at first. "Tobi get's to spend alone time!" The blush on my cheeks only spread and grew brighter, so I resorted to gazing at the ground, hoping he wouldn't notice.

"Yeah…" Arms wrapped tightly around my waist, pulling me into an embrace, that I was nearly certain would crush me.

"Let's go, Tsuki-chan. Wouldn't want to upset leader-sama, now would we?" His voice held that same, deep sultry sound as it did in that dream…now thinking back on it, it was the same voice he had when I first met him in the infirmary. It scared me… but at the same time, it lit a certain fire within my body that I didn't understand. It made no sense…

Clearly, the masked man had no intention of putting me down, as he slung my bag over his shoulder, and placed his hands under my knees and gently on my back, so he could carry me with my body pressed firmly against my chest.

"Close your eyes Tsuki-chan." He whispered, and I did so immediately. Suddenly my body felt light, as if it didn't exist anymore, it felt…good to say in the least. My eyes stayed sealed shut, but I used the rest of my senses to try and tell how fast we were going.

I couldn't tell though. It was as if all my senses had been shut down…like we were in the middle of some sort of white nothingness. I shuddered, and I barely felt Tobi pull me tighter to him.

"Tsuki can open her eyes now." His voice was no longer deep, but it was still spoken in a soft whisper. I slowly opened them to see that we were on a dirt road, but it was one that I had known fairly well. How were we all the way at the border of wind country and fire country?

The sun hadn't even gone down yet. I glanced up at Tobi with a confused look and he merely tilted his head. I could feel his smile through his mask. Letting me down to my feet, he lifted up a finger and wagged it back and forth to my un-posed question. "Ah-Ah! Tobi can't tell Tsuki how he did it! It's a secret!" With a childish bounce, he began to walk ahead of me, leaving me behind for a few seconds in my awestruck state.

It didn't register to me that he was a good while ahead of me until he turned, calling my name. "Tsuki-chan! Catch up! We don't want to lose our target!" He waved his hand back and forth, to catch my attention, so I pushed as much chakra as I could into my feet to dash forwards. Once next to him, I skidded to a stop, allowing a lop-sided grin to come onto my lips. "Ah, Tsu-Tsu-chan looks so cute when she's smiling! Tsu-Tsu-chan should do it more often!" That blush that had disappeared only a few minutes ago, came back.

_You're actually attracted to this fool?_

_That's pathetic. In all honesty, He's nothing but a liar._

_However, if you want to whore yourself to that…imposter, you can go right on ahead._

_Fucking slut._

Furrowing my brows again, I gripped my head tightly, pulling on my hair. It just wouldn't go away when I felt okay. It just had to go ahead and ruin everything. Ugh.

Tobi seemed to notice my distress, so he placed his hands on mine, pulling them away from the entanglement of my hair. He softly drew circles on the backs of my hands, while gazing intently at me. I finally saw his eye, the one that had been exposed by that little hole, but it was closed. I didn't shy away. I didn't grow panicky, or scared. I just felt…content. "Does Tsu-Tsu-chan just want to camp out here?" His question was asked in sincerity, but I wasn't about to be the reason as to why we failed our mission. I wouldn't be able to bear that weight, much less the punishment that could follow afterwards.

Shaking my head furiously, I pushed him away, and gave him another fake smile. It would be fine… I would shove that voice back, I would ignore my feelings—not that there were any to begin with, or so I had convinced myself—and we would continue. Taking no arguments, I began to walk away in the direction that I figured our targets would be.

"Tsu-Tsu-chan…" He started, but I shook my head, pulling him along. "Tsu-Tsu-chan, you're going the wrong way!"

Pause.

Embarrassment.

Looking back, I saw Tobi pointing towards the direction of the woods.

"If Tobi and Tsuki-chan keep going that way, Tobi and Tsuki will end up in Konohagakure! That wouldn't be very good! Tobi only wants to protect Tsuki-chan!" He pulled on my arm a little too roughly, dashing towards the dense expanse of forest that lay ahead.

Faint chakra signatures that seemed somewhat familiar were strewn across the area, prominent in hidden areas, such as bushes and trees, as if their owners were hiding for an ambush.

I caught sight of a kunai on a tree. Dried blood that was flaking off, all over the tree, and knife itself. My breath caught in my throat. My eyes glazed over.

_"Run, darling. Run." Piercing red eyes, concerned for the welfare of the child, with deep chocolate brown and dirty blonde hair, darted from the target of interest. Nothing could happen to her. She was his pride and joy. She was his last heir to his throne. She had to survive. _

_If it wasn't for that damned mother of hers, none of this would be happening. They wouldn't be running._

_"D-daddy…Dad-d-dy, I c-can't leave you. I have no where t-to g-go." Crystalloid pink eyes gazed up into his own, scared. She had a point. There was nowhere for her to return to._

_"I'll come for you darling. Just run. Get as far away from here as you can! When you get weak, hide yourself well." He glanced around the area quickly, before letting his fingers gently brush away her bangs. With the tenderness that a father should have, he held her chin in his hands, and wiped away the tears that dripped slowly from her eyes. He knew he wouldn't be able to come for her. She knew his words were empty and that he would be dead before she could make it three miles away. "Do you remember what I told you? How to disguise yourself?" A hesitant nod came from the young girl. Along with a sob._

_She was only six years old. This shouldn't have been happening!_

_The two stuck in the horrid predicament suddenly stiffened, the sound and feel of others coming closer. There was no time for sweet good-byes. Empty lies that could never be fulfilled. Twenty two year old man pushed his daughter away towards the woods in the opposite direction. "Don't worry sweet—" He was cut off, blood spurting from his mouth as the kunai hit him in his back. Another was rammed into the back of his neck, and he fell forward, eyes slowly closing with a death that was dealt to young. "Run, Tsuki…run…"_

Tears.

Blurred vision.

Shaking.

"T-tobi! Stop!" I had to force myself to cry out his name. I couldn't go any further. At this point repercussions for jeopardizing the mission flew out the window. I had to keep us safe. I wasn't about to possibly lose someone else in the same exact area. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I felt our bodies come to a halt, and then, Tobi pulled me tight against him.

"What's wrong, Tsuki-chan?" I caught worry in the deep black eye that peaked through the mask's hole.

"We…we need to t-take a different-t route. They'll amb-bush us! And…and…I c-couldn't st-tand you getting hurt-t." I glanced down to my feet, tearing up and before I knew it, soft salty trails were drawing inconsistent patterns along my cheeks. I didn't understand why he meant so much to me…

"Don't worry, Tsuki-chan! Tobi-can take care of himself. And Tobi can take care of Tsuki-chan too!" With gentle fingers, he softly began to massage the small of my back, earning a shiver from my body. He leaned in, till he was right next to my ear, then he lifted up his mask, so his lips were showing. "I know that I can take care of you, Tsu-Tsu-chan. In more ways than one."

The delicate nip of teeth on my earlobe was nearly enough to drive me crazy. My cheeks burned with a heat that rivaled the one that had started to boil in my stomach. Good God what was he doing to me?

"Tsuki-chan, go hide in that rose bush over there." He pointed to the left, but I quickly shook my head. More tears fell, as I relieved that vision over and over. That little piece of my past that wouldn't leave.

"T-tobi-kun, I will fight-t with you. No b-buts!" Something had sparked in him, as if he wanted to see me fight. He nodded vigourously, and ran forward once again, pulling my slight frame behind him.

_He only wants you to fight to test your strength._

_He doesn't care if you make it out alive or not._

_It'll only prove that you were a waste of time._

"You're wrong." I murmured, barely recognizing that Tobi was still pulling me.

* * *

The sun was starting to set slowly, painting the sky with brilliant hues of pink, purple, orange and a deep red. The sun scarcely made it over the top of the mountains in the distance, and the moon was rising high in the sky. Stars were starting to make their way into the dimly lit sky, and although it occurred over an hour, they seemed to make a home in the firmament above in less than a minute.

"Does Tsuki-chan like the sunset?" An arm snaked around my tiny waist slowly, and his head fell against my shoulder with his whisper. Another shiver. Another long rant from the voice in my head, telling me it was all just a façade.

All I could do was nod, and reach my arm up to softly play with his hair. A content sigh left his lips, his hands kneaded the skin around my waist tenderly. I felt so…safe with him holding me. I felt light. I didn't understand why…nor did I want to. When I was around him, I didn't really hate myself as much. I didn't feel shy… I just felt like…me. It was amazing.

"Tsuki-chan…" Tilting my head, I laid a soft kiss to the top of his mask, and stood. It took a few seconds for me to stretch out and fell satisfied, but by that point, Tobi had stood as well. Only he seemed like he was staring at me. Self-conscious, and a little uneasy, I wrapped my arms around my chest, watching him carefully. "Tsuki Miyoko…my Beautiful Moon…" He took a few steps closer to me. That voice was back… that deep, sexy voice…

It happened to suddenly for me to recognize that it had happened at all. I could faintly hear the whirring of metal. My body was shoved into Tobi's as he tackled me to the ground roughly, causing me to hit the foliage with a vicious _thud_. A groan left my lips, but Tobi silenced me with a hand over my mouth.

"Who's there?" Footsteps paced frantically around the area that we had just been sitting. "We know you're there! Show yourself!"

Malicious chakra abruptly engulfed me, and shout were heard from a far distance.

It couldn't have been Tobi's…could it?

"Tsuki-chan, when I get up, go attack from the other side. Do _not_ take the enemy lightly, understand?" A muffled 'yes' came from my lips.

So this was it? My first battle with Tobi?

A little out of the blue… but hey.

That dark chakra continued to spread from the general area around us—and by the count of three, Tobi had jumped up to start his attack.

My body darted to the right, then I swung myself arounf to attack from the back. From what I could tell, there had to be at least twenty shinobi, and one man who appeared to be anything _but_ threatening. His body shook with fear. He knew deep down tonight would be his last. It was just to obvious. If the Akatsuki were after him, hiring twenty chuunin's to protect him, really wasn't going to do anything. Honestly, it was as if he was teasing us. Making us wear ourselves down until he brought the big guns out… But he couldn't have had money enough to do that.

Silencing my steps, I pressed on, ignoring all my previous thoughts. When fighting it was always best to live in the moment, and deal with the afterthought later. There was no room for mistakes.

Kunai were whizzing this way and that, hitting branches, and rocks, deflecting off of each other with the familiar clang of metal against metal. Reaching into my boots, I produced two sais , and made my first attack.

He was blonde, with a shaggy head of hair. Dirt was all over his body—noting that he had to have been traveling for quite some time. His chakra was low, his breath was labored; it was pretty obvious that he wouldn't have a chance. I almost felt bad for him.

His topaz eyes moved back and forth, scanning the area for my presence, but I had made sure to leave none. With precise, and practiced movements, I appeared next to him, pressing my front against his back. Both mini-swords were pressed up against his neck—and I could just feel his heart beat in his throat. "I'll make it quick." I whispered, with no stutter, and sliced his neck, hitting every possible vein and artery in the process. It felt so good to be in power again. God dammit it felt amazing.

_That's it…_

_Destroy everything you come in contact with._

_Let bodies fall mercilessly at your will._

_Kill them all._

A malevolent grin attached itself to my lips, as I made my way to each of my victims, being sure to whisper sweet reassurances into their ear before I slit them open—before I watched them fall to the ground, blood gurgling in their throats, pouring from wounds. Their eyes glazing over with the impending death that I had given them as quickly as possible. Bodies falling mercilessly to the grass with lifeless weight. Dying…dying…

My tongue flicked out to grace the sai held in my left hand, so I could taste their blood. Mixed together in some sort of exotic cocktail.

I was too absorbed in the irony, salty taste to realize the sound of somebody moving faster…closer to me. I didn't hear Tobi call out to me. Hell, I didn't even feel the kunai that embedded itself into my side.

A dull throbbing pain started to make itself apparent in my side, then the wet feeling that started to drip down the outside of my hip, and down my thigh. My eyes went blurry again. My head spun. Blood slowly dripped out from my lips, merging with the tainted blood of others. Falling to my knees, I let out a pathetic cry, throwing my sai with trained ease to the person who had stabbed me. He fell to the ground next to me with a cry just the same, and a content smirk reached my body. "P-pay back's a b-bitch."

Worried words left the lips of an angel, but I couldn't really hear them. I was a little too far gone. I shook my head fast, trying to regain some consciousness.

"Tsuki-chan…Stay awake. Tobi will make it all better. Tobi will rid these people of their miserable lives." He chuckled, but it was more of an angry chuckle, laced with malice, and violence. Silver pink eyes shut tightly to try and will the pain away. It wasn't a dull throb anymore. It was an obnoxious never ending pain that wouldn't go away. I heard screams of men, the begging's of men obviously discarding what little dignity they had. But Tobi wouldn't spare them.

Within seconds, I felt him at my side again, fretting like crazy. "Tsuki-chan! Tobi will make it better!" That recognizable sound of his glove being ripped from his skin, hit my ears, and that familiar cool feeling splayed across my wound. A soft sigh left my lips. "Does it feel better yet, Tsuki-chan?" His cool mask pressed against my forehead as I nodded, and his satisfied release of breath relaxed me. "Tobi's almost done." He spoke softly, and ran his free hand through my now tangled mass of hair. I could feel the clumps of blood from my victims start to form in my hair, and I felt it drying on my skin. "Tsuki, I'm going to take you to a river so we can wash you up." Tobi let his mask come up to the bridge of his nose as he gently kissed the corner of my mouth, slowly making his way down to my chin. "Mmm…my beautiful Tsuki…" Blush after blush just kept creeping up on me. I had to disagree with his statement. I was the farthest thing from beautiful. I was probably one of the ugliest girls around.

He gently nuzzled into my neck, laying soft kisses that made my heart flutter in ways that I never thought imaginable. God he made me feel so strange.

While he made his way towards the supposed river that he was going to wash me off in, I couldn't help but to think about the differences in his personalities. There was cute, adourable—although slightly obnoxious—lovable Tobi. He was so…spontaneous, and to tell the truth, _that_ Tobi was the one that I loved. Then there was mysterious, sexy Tobi. The Tobi that I was scared with at first, but had recently started to grow attached too. In fact, he was still tender in the way he handled me. Still loving in the way he spoke to me…

It was confusing though. Why was he like that? What on earth did I do to deserve such a sweetheart like him? I was certain nothing… but I wasn't going to start complaining now. I would just figure it out, bit by bit.

"Tsuki-chan, Tobi doesn't want her to feel strange, so Tobi will just turn away while Tsuki cleans up, okay?" I felt the reluctance in his muscles when he let me down.

"T-tobi-kun, I need your help-p. I won't-t be unc-comfortable." I brought my fingers to intertwine with his before I pulled him closer towards the river with me.

I didn't know what possessed me to be so bold. I didn't know where letting him wash me was going to lead. But I sure as hell wasn't going to sit around and not find out.

_This just proves the fact that you're a whore._

_In the woods? _

_Really? You didn't have enough dignity to go somewhere private?_

Shut up. It's my life. I'll live it how I want to.

* * *

_**Alright guys..**_

_**So I cut this chapter short, mostly because I felt it was too long and boring for you guys, and also because If I kept going, I wouldn't have anything to write for chapter eight or nine.**_

_**In all honesty, this very well could have been a three-in-one deal.**_

_**But I couldn't do that :D**_

_**So I'll leave you guys wondering what's going to happen ;P**_

_**Any ideas? Lemme know :p**_

**_Love always~_**

**_Luna-chan_**

**_p.s. Longest chapter EVUR! 7,462 words!_**


	9. Undisclosed Desires

_**So, ya'll ready for chapter 8?**_

_**Whatdya think?**_

_**Hawt smexiiness coming up? Maybe some foreplay? Or perhaps just fluff?**_

_**I won't tell you just yet!**_

_**You'll have to read on to find out!**_

_**ALSO! I'M TERRIBLY SORRY FOR THE SUPER LONG WAIT! IF IT WASN'T FOR KIRA-CHAN THIS WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN OUT FOR ANOTHER…MONTH!**_

_**I also thank the readers :p**_

_**In fact, here! **_

_**youtube . com /user /Madly Mariah?feature= mhum**_

_**^^^^COPY AND PASTE THE LINK! IT'S IMPORTANT AND I MADE IT JUST FOR YOUUU!**_

_**(just take out the spaceess)**_

_**p.s. Kira-chan wrote the end of the chapter. I indicate when, and pretty much all of it is her writing, save for a little addition of mine here and there. **_

_**SO WHEN YOU WRITE YOUR REVIEW GIVE MEH BOO PROPS! XD**_

_**Disclaimer—you knoooooow.**_

* * *

**Chapter 8**

**Undisclosed Desires.**

Tobi's finger made quick work of my boots, tossing them carelessly over to the grass, followed soon by my skirt. His gloved hands lingered on my waist as he softly made his way up to my top. Heat rose to my cheeks when his hands tugged roughly on the hem of the midriff shirt—and with a simple jerk, it ripped down the side, falling in a heap by my bare feet. His hands made useless patterns over my half-naked body—from tracing the outlines of my tattoo of a cherry blossom stem—going from my knee to under my left breast—to fingering the sensitive area around the piercings on the dimples in my back and my hips.

He tugged at the barely there string of my panties, but did little else. He seemed hesitant…as if…I would reject him if he went any farther. In all actuality, I wasn't really sure if I would or not. The experience was…somewhat new—keeping that bit of past locked firmly away—so it was only natural for me to shy away a bit. But then there was the issue with that fucking voice. Was he right? If I let Tobi-kun take advantage of me would I be a whore?

_But of course, lil' slut._

_Sleeping with anyone—let alone this lying little cheat—out of wed-lock would make you so._

_Common sense girl._

He had a point… we weren't even dating, which would have made the situation less trying on the sanctity of my innocence. I wouldn't have even thought twice if Tobi and I were…hmm…_partners_—for I couldn't ever fully bring myself to call either of us _boyfriend _or_ girlfriend_—because he seemed like a pretty loyal guy. One that I could trust wouldn't fuck me and leave me to wallow in myself pity—leave me to cry and bleed alone whilst he ran about going after all the other whores in the world. He wouldn't do that. In fact, I was pretty sure the carefree man was a virgin… he sure as hell didn't appear to have ever even been presented with the option of getting laid—for the simple fact that most women might have found him just to be adourable and nothing more, a bit creepy—considering the mask thing—or just plain obnoxious. But his hands were so _skilled._ Every time his fingers found the skin of my waist it felt like millions of butterflies were spreading their wings in my stomach—ready to take flight. His touches loosened all my muscles, rather than tense them, as opposed to when everyone else even gently poked me. Those facts alone made me doubt that he didn't have at least a _teensy_ bit of experience…

Drawing my attention away from my thoughts, the rogue shinobi put my hands on the zipper of his cloak, signaling he wanted me to rid him of it. It would make sense—the heavy fabric would only cause to be even more of a burden when wet, so taking it off was logical. Hmm…Tobi with logical thinking didn't seem to fit right… "Tsuki-chan, take it off." His impatience was evident. His voice was deep again. Low, but still demanding. A certain heat filled up my stomach, a tingling sensation started to rise up between my thighs.

An oldish-new feeling. I had felt excited before…but it was an excitement brought on by natural instinct—masked by a fear of the entirety of it all. I had never felt so…positively—for lack of a better word—about it. I had never_ wanted_ to be touched…to be satisfied in an erotic dance made from the privacy of the softest beds, to the hard, indiscreet alleyway walls.

Nonetheless, I was terrified. Not of the act that I was certain would come—but of the thoughts my masked friend was having. What did he really think of me exposed in my half-naked glory? Was I just a pretty little whore to him? Was I disgustingly ugly—repulsing him in every way shape and form? Or was I beautiful? It was hard to tell what with his mask and all.

Growing impatient with my reluctance—and my apparent zoning—Tobi took my hand in his own and quickly yanked down the zipper of his cloak. What was underneath, really didn't surprise me. Despite his blithe attitude—Tobi had always come off as conservative, so his black turtle neck shirt and plain standard ninja pants were no shock. However—he had on strange armour. Two pieces, that came to a point at the end hung loosely from his hips, the rest seemed pretty typical. Chest protector, shoulder guards, wrist guards, you know, the works. The way it was designed—like they had simply skinned a dragon or something of the like—was what made it so strange to me. My fingers gently touched the smooth metal, surprised by the shockingly gentle feel of it.

Tobi pulled at the armour effortlessly, taking the chest and shoulder guards off first, then the remainder of it—all with the ease that one would expect a shinobi would have. He let each piece fall carelessly to the ground, before he stepped quickly away from me to remove both his turtle neck shirt, and his cropped pants—of course his ninja sandals came along with this. I watched in awe as each inch of his skin was revealed. It appeared surprisingly smooth—despite all of the scars that made themselves present. Apparently Tobi had seen his fair share of fights, but it didn't matter to me. I found them attractive in their own way.

_Tch. So it's really come down to this._

_You're really going to give into him?_

_You're really gunna be even _more_ of a slut?_

_That's a shame._

Pain contoured my features, and my fingers started scraping furiously at the skin on my bare stomach. Why wouldn't it just go away? Why did it have to ruin the moment? I felt that familiar stinging sensation that followed when my nails broke through my skin begin to burn in my sides, but it subsided just as quickly when Tobi-kun pressed the cool "forehead" of his mask against mine. His black eye stared at me through the hole, my breath caught in my throat, and Tobi pried my fingers from their spot on my torso. "Stop it, Tsuki-chan. Hurting yourself won't make anything better. But I know what will."

Soft fingertips pressed against my sides, gently guiding me backwards towards the river that had waited patiently for us to enter. My feet clumsily found the edge of the river bank, causing me to stumble a bit, but Tobi wasn't about to let me fall into the water—on my own anyway. His grip on my upper waist grew tighter as he scooped me up into his arms like the child I really was. His muscles in his chest flexed as he pulled me against it, before taking the first cold step into the waterway. I could feel him tensing beneath me from the coolness, but I didn't really think much of it. If he could tolerate it, then I could.

_Close yours eyes._

_Breathe._

_Why do I feel this way?_

My eyes fluttered closed when the very tips of my toes hit the surface of the water. I had underestimated the temperature—that shit was maaaddd cold. My body reacted immediately when Tobi's finger slipped from under my thighs, allowing me to stand about mid torso deep in freezing cold water. A sharp breath. A screech. I could hear Tobi laughing at me as I tried to scramble for the edge of the water.

"Tsuki-chan, we have to clean you first!" He pulled me flush against his body—dripping with little drops of water—and nuzzled his head against the crook of my neck. "I'll keep you warm until we're done, don't worry." I couldn't stop blushing from embarrassment.

It was bad enough that he was holding me so tenderly…then he had to laugh at me…Tears almost fell from my eyes. God I was so weak. I was honestly going to cry at something so trivial? It made me sick. Of _course_ I would just start tearing up. Ugh. Typical little weakling.

But Tobi stopped laughing. In fact, he stopped moving completely. After what seemed like a good ten fifteen minutes of my fretting that he had possibly turned to stone, his gentle fingers worked their way up delicate skin—oh so sensitive to their barely there caresses—until they began to massage my shoulder blades in slow, circular motions. "Tsuki…Keep your back to me, understand?" He whispered it just against my ear, the wood of his mask brushing roughly against my earlobe. "Don't turn until I say so."

Of course I obeyed. I didn't want tobi getting upset with me…no I definitely didn't want that. Tobi was special…something that I couldn't bear dealing with if he had gotten angry with me…The faint sound of something hitting the grass graced my ears, and no sooner had I heard the sound had soft gentle lips found my ear lobe, nibbling and suckling ever so gently. "Tsuki-chan…"My name was no more than a growl coming from deep in the back of his throat. His fingers pressed so roughly into my sides, I thought he might break through the skin. But it didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered anymore.

The cold water. The heat that was welling up deep inside of me. The embarrassment that I was sure to have later. The anxiety. The voices. Nothing seemed to even have any registry in my brain. I could only focus on the close proximity of his body and the wonders he was doing to it. My eyes shut tightly as each breath I took became more shallow—the carnal need that was buzzing in the back of my mind slowly pushing forward and rearing its head. I groaned in anguish. I wasn't used to such feelings. It was driving me insane.

Tobi's hands pulled me closer—after I had let out the primal sound—and one reached up lazily to fondle at the strap of my bra. Sharp teeth nipped more vigourously at exposed flesh—bodies rubbed up against each-other, begging for a relief of the heat that wouldn't leave. Eyes shut even tighter than what they were before—breaths came out in short gasps. Incoherent words were whispered, slipping off the tips of tongues that were too tied to even register what was being said. Gentle lips found their way along my shoulder, up the side of my neck, to that one specific spot that I hadn't known would send me reeling into bliss only moments later. With a non-too-delicate bite, Tobi sunk his teeth into the junction between my neck and collar, drawing blood from the mark, along with an erotic cry from my lips. He didn't hide his moan of sheer pleasure, nor his arousal that pressed greedily against my back.

"That sound was beautiful Tsuki-chan…just like the rest of you…and you taste _so damn good._" His body shivered with the thoughts.

I wanted to agree. I wanted more from this. But I was so scared. Where would this turn out? What was going to happen if we actually went through with this? Fear flashed in my eyes if only for a second before Tobi's fingers were pushing down the straps of my bra, his tongue followed every movement. His attraction was only due to a lust deep within him, I had convinced myself of that—even though I knew it was just a fallacy made to keep my mind racing with anxiety and every-other possible bad thing that could go through my mind.

_Please…Don't push me away…_

I felt a burning sensation in my chest. That familiar feeling I got when I was slowly breaking. When I was so close to going insane. Terrified of what I would do, a gentle whimper left my lips, and Tobi stopped caressing my bare breasts. Funny…I hadn't noticed it…I would have thought I would have felt it but…nothing…

"Is something wrong, Tsu-Tsu? Did I do something you didn't like?" Such a sultry tone…it sent shivers up and down my spine…sent heat into places I didn't know could feel like that. I took in a shallow, shaky breath, trying to calm myself.

Colours that didn't belong in a forest in the dark dotted my eyesight. Pinks…yellows…electric blues…oranges. They all darted back and forth—teasing me into trying to see straight—teasing me into attempting to regain my senses. The burning in my chest got worse. I held my breath to try to get it to stop, but it wouldn't go away. Another strangled sound left my pale purple lips as Tobi's grip on my body got tighter. His hands nearly clawed into my shoulders as he whispered questions into my ear. I could barely hear them regardless of how close he was to me.

"Tsuki? What's wrong?" Hyperventilation…temporary loss of hearing…of seeing…dizziness…migraine…God fuck me sideways to Saturday I was having a fucking panic attack.

_You _would_ ruin the moment with such a ridiculous excuse for a medical problem._

_Tch…panic attacks? Since when was that a horrid disease? _

_Honestly, stupid fucking girl, man up and deal with the pain! _

_Either that or just die already._

Tears started pouring from my eyes, little rivulets of salty water escaping the tightly closed crevices of my eyelids. My cheeks became stained where they left their trail, and some of it dripped lazily into my half open mouth. I tried to form words to alert Tobi, but he had already pulled me quickly from the clutches of the river and had laid me gently against the none to warm grass. "Tsuki, tell me what's wrong!" What happened to third person Tobi?...I liked him…He didn't demand from me in a shouting voice…

Aggh…that yelling hurt…

More pain shot through my body as I gasped for air that wasn't there. My skin started to pale and gain a purple-ish shade to it. Sharp shallow breaths only made it worse. The worried shouts from Tobi weren't helping either. My mind was too much of a jumbled mess to think clearly, to be able to calmly find a solution to my predicament.

_What's happening?_

_Why won't this pain go away?_

_Why won't you just leave me alone…_

Everything suddenly went black. There was no more pain, there was no more shouting—just stark blackness, surrounding me in every crevice of my mind…It was odd—as if I was watching myself from someone else's eyes. Watching as my body turned back and forth—my head whipping back and forth trying to find some sort of exit. I was being alone…let alone in the dark…

_"You're so very stupid."_ That same voice…it echoed mercilessly off invisible walls in my mind…

Laughing at me…

I glanced around more fervently, trying to find a source, but my attempts were futile.

I tried to run away…run faster and faster, but it appeared as if I was going nowhere—as if I was simply running in circles.

"_If you keep doing that, all you're going to accomplish is tiring yourself out."_ The voice was right next to my ear. Purring it's insults gently against my cold skin. As I whipped my head around I caught the glimmer of a silvery substance…I couldn't tell what it was at first until I had turned completely around.

"W-what-t…" Sitting before me in a chair made of what appeared to be glass was some sort of…demon I suppose? Or maybe that's what Id monsters looked like up close? A single horn protruded out of the left side of a flowing fluorescent red mane atop its head, pointed ears pierced three times on both sides perked up from under the mass of tresses as well. A sinister grin took its home on a slender face, with perfectly chiseled features. Pale, pale skin stood out against the flowing black robes that it wore, and I could see how skinny it was from the arm that was exposed from the billowing sleeve—as it had fallen around his elbow when he rested his chin unto his hand. Its legs were crossed at the knees, but I couldn't really see if it had real legs, hooves, or what. In all honesty, it was not what I expected.

"_You should take a picture," _it purred softly, "_it will last much longer. I promise, bitch."_

I shut my eyes willing the images before me to disappear but they wouldn't. Every time my eyes closed the voice only got stronger…only got more visible. A whimper left my lips at the same time a sigh of annoyance left his.

"_Must I repeat this _every. Single. Time_ I speak with you?_ _Stupid whore, you cannot remove me from your sight. I will always be there." _It chuckled to itself, as if it was sharing an inside joke with itself.

"W-why…" Slender fingers went up to bright lips to silence me and I shut up immediately.

"_Why don't you take a seat, girl. I'll explain everything, but I'll make sure to do it slowly so you understand."_ Another smirk.

Falling onto a rough surface.

Tears.

"_Stop that useless leakage from your eyes,_ before_ I smack you bitch." _It's malicious hiss startled me. "_For starters, my name is Shiva. I am your conscious. Your entirety. Your body. Your thoughts. Everything you do, I do. Everything I do, you do. It's simple as that. And for the record, I am _not_ an Id. Those mindless fools don't have the power that I have over you. And they can't become corporeal like I can. If I wanted to, I could phase myself from your mind and show everyone why you suffer the way you do. However, I'd much rather torture you in here," _he pointed to his head,_ "and make people think you're crazy." _

That laugh… that malicious laugh…

It drove me insane... "W-why…Why d-do you t-torture me…"

I swear I was ready to explode with that chuckle. It was horrid.

"_Because, stupid slut, it's fun, and I've been instructed to do so." _Bit by bit his body started to disintegrate…disappear into the black void that was my mind, and just like that, I was alone again. Frantically searching for my masked saviour.

Running through empty halls, unkept and broken down—paint chipping and peeling from corners, and stains of some unknown liquid seeming to splatter randomly without a single source. My eyes felt like they were going to explode from my head as a migraine formed, forcing me to the ground on my knees.

_Wake up Tsuki…Wake up…._

*~Tobi's P.O.V*~

I tried my very hardest to be gentle with her, very cautiously positioning her so she was sitting in between my legs. I didn't want to startle her by jostling her around too much, That wouldn't necessarily be great.

Her body was still wet, still housing little droplets of water that fell from the tips of her full eyelashes, down her tan cheek, over the subtle curve of her lip and down her neck, disappearing into that beautiful valley that was created by her breasts. Her hands that were resting gently against my thighs soaked my skin, but in all honesty, I didn't mind. So long as I was able to hold my precious Tsuki in my arms—as long as I was able to touch her and claim her as my own…

Tsuki started to stir a bit, her body turning over a few times before finally those metallic pink eyes that I loved so much shot open, and her breath started to come out in ragged pants. I grasped onto her tightly, pressing that lovely perfectly shaped, gorgeous body of hers firmly against mine. God, how I would love to feel her against me in _our_ bed, our bodies tangled together in a wondrous dance.

"Tsuki-chan, are you alright?" I murmured the words quietly against her ear as so not to frighten her any more than she already was. I hated when she was so scared…

She tilted her head to gaze at me, fear present in those amazing eyes of hers. At this point, I hadn't given a care in the world about having my mask off, after all she was going to see my face one day or another. Quickly averting her eyes away from me, Tsuki folded into herself, scrunching her body into the fetal position and closing her eyes tightly. It was hard to tell if she was afraid of me, or just looking into my eyes. Although it hurt me, I couldn't blame her…after all she had been through anyway.

I pressed my lips softly against her neck, nipping and sucking at every sensitive it of skin I could get my mouth on—I just couldn't resist. She tasted so _good._ She tasted so sweet against my tongue. I loved the smooth feel of her skin as I bit into it ever so slightly, the soft whimpers of pleasure that escaped those beautiful, perfect plump pale purple lips of hers. There was nothing more amazing than the beautiful entity that what Tsuki.

"T-tobi-kun…" She whispered my name, and I could tell she was trying to keep from moaning it. I'd love to see her resolve break.

"Mmm?" I had no intentions of taking my lips from her succulent neck, at all. She seemed to maneuver herself around a bit, until her legs were wrapped tightly around my waist, her arms were around my neck and her bare chest pressed flush against my own. Her eyes opened, staring intently into my own—of course, I had deactivated my Sharingan. I knew that it would appear menacing to her, and the last thing that I wanted to do was drive her away.

"Th-thank you…for b-being here f-for me…and-d…and f-for help-ping me. It really means a lot-t…" Tsuki pulled me closer, and I swear my heart skipped a beat.

She was being the bold one now, pressing her lips against mine so fiercely before I had a chance to respond and tell her that there was no reason to thank me—that I would gladly give her anything, that I'd gladly give my life for her. Pressing against me harder, Tsuki managed to push me against the ground, her hips shoved eagerly against my own. I wasn't going to deny her pleasure if that was what she wanted.

In fact, I'd prove to her that I was the very best at it. I'd prove that her sweet innocent little "Tobi" wasn't very innocent at all. I'd make her scream my name…beg for more beneath me as I did wonderful things to that delicate body of hers. The body that I was so careful not to break—lest I be damned with the unfortunate luck of never seeing my precious Tsuki ever again.

A strangled sound left the lips of my dearest as she rocked back on her heels, grasping at her head with a pained look on her face. I couldn't help but to glance down at her breasts that were pressed gently against her thighs as she bent so her head was on her knees.

That pain that always crept up on her when it was the least wanted, troubled me. I had no idea what it was…well maybe I had a hunch, but still, I had no grasp on the fact that it could affect her physically. I tried to ignore the raging heat that was growing more and more present in my groin—with her pretty much naked lower half resting firmly against my hips, and pressing into a certain needy area making it worse—so I could comfort her, but it was hard for me to do.

"Tsu-Tsu-chan," a gentle coo that left my lip, "what's the matter?" My fingers danced softly up and down her sides as I rested up on one of my elbows, but she didn't respond to me. She simply muttered unintelligible nothings to herself. I supposed that the "episode" would just have to pass on its own…at least until I could figure out away to help her.

"I'm…I'm sorry T-tobi-kun…I ruined-d everything…" Tsuki's eyes held unshed tears in them, unshed tears that pushed me to wrap my arms tightly around her, and whisper gently into her ear. Everything that I did with her had to be gentle, unless I wanted to lose her…

"Tsuki-chan, you never ever ruin anything, do you understand me? It's not your fault, it never will be your fault, and I refuse to allow you to think that it is, okay?" I placed a tender kiss on her forehead, before holding her cheeks in my hands, making her look at me. "Promise me you won't _ever _take the blame for something that very clearly wasn't your fault." My words hit home with her. I could feel those unshed tears starting to brim over the edge, and fall carelessly down her cheeks and onto my once dry hands. She trembled a bit in my arms, but it didn't matter.

"I…I c-can't p-promise that-t. I d-don't think-k th-that I could-d do that-t…" Her head pressed against my hands as if seeking out the comfort that was held there.

"Then promise me that you'll try?" It was better than nothing. I felt her nod, then I pulled her even closer—if it was possible—and just held her there. _My _Tsuki started to trace useless circles on my shoulder blades, as she held me tightly. "Good. Now let's get you dressed, mm?" Another nod full of vigour and the small girl was out of my arms, darting to the clothes that had been long forgotten only moments ago. I followed suit, only at a much slower pace—and although I took my time and started after her, I had finished before her. "Having some trouble, Tsu-Tsu-chan?"

"SHHHH!" If the pout that made a home on her face wasn't cute, then I had no idea what cute was! Her lower lip poked out ever so slightly as she tried to clasp the strapless bra she wore, and she tilted her head back, seeming to arch a bit as she turned in circles. All in all, it was quite a sight to see.

"I can he—"

"NOOOO! I c-can d-do th-this on my own!" Tsuki was honestly to cute for her own good. I could only sit on a nicely placed rock under the moon and watch the younger girl's show as she appeared to waltz around the soft, semi wet grass that had the imprints of our bodies imbedded into it. A low growl came from her mouth, however she had surprisingly completed her task, and she triumphantly turned towards me with an eager grin on her face. "I t-told you!" She called out, her eyes glistening with a childish happiness that I had forgotten existed. She hadn't appeared so happy in so long…I missed it so much.

"Well then, Tsuki-chan, let's get going." I held my hand out for her to take, but she ignored it, and started walking off in the general direction of our current hideout.

Silence surrounded us as we made our way slowly through the moonlit forest, our steps masked by the stealth we had as shinobi. Tsuki's eyes were focused on the sky above us, calculating how many stars there were…calculating the beauty of it all. She tilted her head towards me and opened her lips as if to say something, ut she closed them just as quickly.

"Something you want to say, Tsu-Tsu-chan?" She turned away from me, and the faintest hint of a blush came onto her tanned cheeks.

"Y-you…you t-took off-f your mask-k for me…" She looked back up into both of my eyes curiosity posing a question that I was ready to ask for her. With a complete seriousness taking over my air, I stopped walking, and turned so the both of us were facing each other.

"Do you know who I am, Tsuki?"

A pause…A quick breath…Closed eyes contemplating…

(Kira-chanstuffersxD)

I can't say I was surprised when she shook her head ever so slightly, eyes cast down like it was something to be ashamed of. But how come she didn't? Was it my appearance? Or had something caused her to forget? Or was it simply because of her age back then, so young and naïve that she sincerely could not remember?

It didn't matter. In fact, it was better this way. With her knowing nothing, there was no possible problems I would encounter with her, and that pleased me, oh so very much.

"Tsu-Tsu-chan," I used the more child-like voice of 'Tobi's as I sought out her hand, grasping it, feeling how she tensed. Did she fear me? No. She was just so timid and unused of being in contact with other people like this, "Let's hurry and get back to the base before nighttime!" I saw her blink slowly, her silvery metallic pink eyes innocent and curious. If I hadn't looked, the slight curl of the corners of her mouth would have gone unnoticed.

She was smiling.  
And it was beautiful.  
"O-okay.. Tobi-kun." She whispered, and we continued on our way.

As we arrived back to the main base, I sensed how she tensed, her small body sending out waves of distress and discomfort around her. She hated this place. With instincts driving me, I pulled her closer to myself protectively. "Is Tsu-Tsu-chan feeling cold?"

She looked up at me. Normally she avoided eye contact at all costs, but she had started to seek out my gaze, which pleased me. That meant she felt comfortable around me and wasn't afraid. Droplets of water fell from her chin from the rain, and her messy, yet so soft looking hair stuck to her face, making her look rather... delectable. Even more than she did normally.  
"I'm.. fine.." A very gentle, shivery whisper. I loved her voice. I wanted to hear her speaking out my name... to moan it out loud...but that was going too far now that we were back…

I knew I had to go report to Pein, not that it really made much difference, seeing as I was the one who had organized the outing, but it had to be done either way—so as to keep up my act and hide my true identity. It didn't take very long though, although Tsuki didn't want to come to Pein's office—however I didn't mind that. I'd let her do anything she wanted, as long as she was in my reach. Tsuki would've been half way to her and Hika-chan's room, by the time I came back, and I wasn't surprised to see her walking cautiously—trying to avoid any and all contact with the other members. Something caught my eye though, that sent anger boiling in my skin. I saw the one I called my 'sempai', approaching _my_ Tsuki. What was he doing? A snarl nearly ripped itself from my throat, but I restrained myself and barely glared at him viciously, eyes boring into his skull. I wanted him away from my Tsuki. He was scaring her. She was literally trembling, staring down at her feet.  
"Tsuki, hm," he began, "I need your help, yeah. Or more like, your opinion on something, hmmm." My hands fisted tightly as the need to stand over my fragile flower grew stronger and stronger, until I couldn't help but stride up to them, lunging at Deidara with a very high call of, "SEMPAI~!" as I managed to send him on the ground.  
This was the first time I didn't do it for the sake of keeping up my fake identity. It served as a way to keep him away from Tsuki, at least at a safe distance without making it look suspicious. I was brilliant. Coming up with such ideas that could allow me to protect my dearest without the slightest hint that something was up? Genius!  
Tsuki winced at the sudden loud voice and action, back pressed against the wall like a cornered animal, full of fright. I wish I could just stand up and wrap my arms around her to comfort her and calm her down, but the more pressing matter of Deidara had to be taken care of before I could hold her in my arms and cuddle into bed with her.  
"TOBI! GET OFF, HMM!" I could see the redness in Deidara's face as he grew angrier by the second.  
"What was Sempai doing with Tsu-Tsu-chan?"  
"Does not concern you, you dumbass, yeah! Get the fuck off of me or I'll blow you into the next week, hmmmm!" (endkira-chanstuff) Jeez, the guy just didn't know how to take a chill pill. Honestly, I couldn't see what Hika-chan saw in him.

Either way, I jumped off of Deidara, and dashed behind Tsuki, wrapping my arms tightly around her waist, 'trying to hide from Deidara'. My lips pressed against the exposed small of her back, and I felt her shiver as my tongue ran over the cool metal balls that rested in equal distances on her back. I'm not gunna lie…those piercings were a big turn on for me…

"Tobi-hmm! Get away! I have to speak with Tsuki aloneeee!" Deidara's pale hand gripped Tsuki's wrist tightly as he tried to drag her away from me, a jolt of pain shooting onto Tsuki's features as he tugged a bit too hard. The bastard was hurting her!

"Stop hurting Tsuki-chan and Tobi will leave Sempai alone!" I bargained childishly, but I knew it would work in the end. Sure enough, he released her, and tapped his foot impatiently.

*~*Tsuki-chan's POV*~*

I was confused. Why the hell would Deidara want to talk to me…I thought he hated me with a burning passion of a thousand raging suns…

"Tsuki-chan, I don't have all day, yeah." He growled impatiently as Tobi started to release his grip from my waist. I could feel the reluctance in his grip—I couldn't deny that I didn't want him to let me go either. The way his tongue gently massaged the sore spots on my piercings had my mind reeling with what it could do in other places… "Well are you coming or not, hmm?"

I could feel the anger emanating from Deidara—it was definitely not the day to mess with him.

Shakily, and uncertain, I followed the blonde bomber around the corner to the door of his bedroom, which he leaned against in his I'm-to-cool-to-care-manner, and proceeded to stare me down. I hated the way his eyes bore holes into my skin…the way it seemed as if he was judging me every time he even glanced at me.

My hear started beating a hundred miles a minute… my head started pounding—my skin itched something fierce and my nails started to scratch relentlessly at the skin on my arms until I started to bleed. Deidara didn't take any notice, and I was glad for it.

"Hikari-chan's birthday is tomorrow…" He turned his head towards the end of the corridor, embarrassment lacing his words…his very nature…"and I don't really know what girls like, yeah. I was hoping you could help me, hmm? I mean, you do share a room with her…and you are a girl." I couldn't answer him. There was a hard lump stuck in my throat that kept me from speaking, let alone breathing. "Tsuki-chan, will you help me pick a present and plan Hikari-chan's birthday party, hmm?" The sincerity in his voice was pure. He truly cared for Hikari, he wanted to make her happy. He wanted to prove to her that he could take care of her and show her a good time. I couldn't deny him that, even if he did hate me with a passion of a thousand burning, raging suns.

With a quick nod, I offered him a smile, then darted off to my bedroom, where I would grab a notebook so I could start planning.

Hikari was in for one hell of a party.

* * *

_**HOLY SHIT! FINALLY! FINISHEDD! YEEESSSS!**_

_**I hope the length of this was good for you guys…and it makes up for updating so late.. I really am sorry, and I aloes hope that the link to the video I made for you guys helped ease the angst and animosity towards me too?**_

_**Please review guys, and once again thank you so very much for sticking around!**_

_**Love Always~**_

_**Mariah Love**_


	10. Bottoms Up

_**Here we go, folks!**_

_**Chapter 9 up and ready for all ya'll :D**_

_**So… In updating this, I must have a bitch moment. **_

_**For the simple fact that I hate trolls… And people who don't know how to read.**_

_**Everybody here knows that I DON'T OWN NARUTO, and therefore, Deidara cannot be my own original character…duhh.**_

_**Now, for whatever reason, some person—who hadn't even the decency post this review under their real name—thinks that I said that Deidara was my OWN OC…**_

_**Does anyone know how utterly REDICULOUS that sounds? **_

_**Now, I kinda understand, because how my description is written, there is no comma between OC and Deidara, but common sense says, he's not my OC. Everyone should know that.**_

_**And can someone tell me if he is completely unrecognizable as a character? Because according to this person he is… I do go slightly OOC with my stories and others' characters, but it is simply for the benefit of the story—things wouldn't work if everyone was a douche canoe. That's the purpose of fan fictions people! To bend and twist and mold characters into people who work with situations in your own mind for your own and other people's enjoyment…GRR. I hate people.**_

_**And now that I've taken my frustrations out—not that you really had to read it, this was more for the benefit of the person who wrote the review—I present, CHAPTER 9! With nice lemony goodness :D**_

_**Disclaimer—I swear if I owned anything but the plot and **_**my**_** characters, do you think I'd be half broke? No. I didn't think so.**_

* * *

**Chapter 9**

**Bottoms up**

*~*3rd _person's P.O.V.*~*_

Tsuki really hadn't known how to plan an actual party, for the simple fact that she had never been brought up with the opportunity to do so. Granted some of her artistic vision would be able to help, it didn't necessarily come in handy when trying to prep for everything. Ideas ran rampant in her head as she sat at the desk in the room shared between her and Hikari, and for a moment, she thought her head might explode. Her pencil tapped against the blank piece of paper in front of her, teasing her into giving up.

But she wouldn't…she couldn't. It was something for a friend…the first friend that she had had in a long time, and in all honesty, she felt that if she didn't do it up right, she'd loose that one luxury that she had been looking for. Her head rested gentlyagainst her palm and she closed her eyes tightly in an attempt to clear her mind.

With a deep breath, the two-toned haired girl began to sketch out a semi-crude drawing of an elaborate set up, meant for the "family room" of the Akatsuki hideout. There were tables meant for drinks, and food, and then there was a separate table meant for Hikari's presents. There was a special arch that she had drawn, that the birthday girl would strut through, with her man on her arms, where the entire Akatsuki would stand, holding some sort of object that would make an arch as well, so it was like she was walking through a tunnel—she had yet to figure out what they would use. And then there was the issue of how the couches in said family room would be arranged, for maximum space, what games would be played, and of course the theme! What would she do for a theme? Tsuki slammed her head down on the desk over her semi-finished drawing of what they were to do for the party, and let a deep breath escape her lips. It was much harder than she ever expected.

_I don't understand why you of all people would even _try_ to plan a party. You clearly aren't one for social gatherings._

_That blonde haired dunce is just as stupid as you, if not dimmer._

She couldn't hold back the hiss that slipped out of her mouth and into the air around her. It was rather frustrating that he wouldn't allow her to just go one day without having to deal with his thoughts attacking the sanity of what once had been _her_ mind. However, now was not the time to be worrying about her…mental issues. She had to focus solely on Hikari, and making sure she had _the _best birthday, ever.

*~*Tsuki-chan's POV*~*

It had taken me a good hour and a half to try and finalize my entire design for Hikari-chan's birthday. In truth, I wasn't all that satisfied, but I had to take into account that neither Deidara nor I had the money to throw an elaborate ball. Nor did either of us have the money to make the party extremely classy. In short, Deidara-san and I had to cut back on buying the _fancy_ party decorations that we wanted, and instead, settled for cheap plastic table cloths, plastic party cups—to hold the alcohol in—reusable plastic bowls and plates, for chips and other things, rolls of coloured paper that would make streamers on the ceiling, and balloons that we were lucky to find fairly cheap. Now all that was left was the presents—and one would think that a simple task, ne? With Deidara-san…it was near impossible…

"Tsuki, do you think that Hikari-chan will like this, hm?" Deidara held up a very flimsy looking see-through dress, with a cheetah-print bra attached, and furry trim around the edges. On the hanger in his other hand, Deidara had a pair of matching thigh high socks, and garters. I nearly face palmed. I wouldn't doubt that it would look amazing on her, that much I was certain, but I couldn't help but to think that it very simply wasn't her style. Although more apt to voice her opinions, and such than I was, I doubted that she was actually as promiscuous as I was, therefore leading me to believe, she would never where it in her life. She seemed to lean just a tad to the conservative side when it came to clothing…

My head shook back and forth slowly, and I held up a simple deep purple bra and boyshort combo, that I was certain would be more her type, and besides, it was the comfortable seamless kind—so it would work for when she was on mission as well as just chillin' around the house. Deidara's nose turned up, his lips pursed in silent disdain. He wanted to see his love dressed in exotic things, something that I was sure every male wanted, but the look quickly faded away, being replaced by a perverted smile.

"I guess that's okay too, hmm." He made quick work of buying the items, before we headed back out to the streets of Amegakure, with one last thing on our minds. Hikari-chan needed a dress to wear to her party…

_Good luck with that…_

Dress shopping for others wasn't my forte… I was always attracted to those crazy cheetah print ones that fit really tightly, or the skimpily cut dress that showed a lot of skin and barely even covered your breasts, or ass. Neither of those were appropriate for a twenty first birthday, nor were they appropriate for being in a room full of sex deprived men. And to think that I could've learned something….

Deidara peeked into shops here and there, eyeing a certain piece before frowning at the price. Nothing here came cheap, and regardless of the fact that the leader of the Akatsuki was like a god to everyone, his subordinates didn't get the luxury of having _everything_ discounted. Only the necessities…and the occasional visit to the local bar, strip club, or hostel.

I had turned my head to the side, noticing a figure dressed in all black following us, but I hadn't said anything. The chakra signature felt familiar, and so, I took it as no real threat. While walking, Deidara had stopped, his eyes focused on a dress displayed in a store window. "THAT'S IT, UN! THAT'S THE DRESS!" With a fervor I hadn't known a male like Deidara could have for fashion, he bounded into the store, speaking so rapidly to one of the floor salesmen that I doubted she understood him.

I glanced at the dress that he had pointed out, taking in the simple details of it. The entire thing was a deep, rich black, with some sort of diamonds making a pattern on the front, almost like a bursting design, but not quite. The top was strapless, but had a wrap that could make it into a halter, or just a plain old sleeveless. It came about knee length, but the mannequin it was on seemed rather short and I expected that the dress would come to about mid thigh length on Hikari. However, I couldn't doubt that it was something she would wear.

With a smile on his face, Deidara exited the shop, a delicately wrapped box in his hand. "I got it, yeah. I even got them to drop the price for me, hmm." So long as he was happy, and didn't accuse me of something, or start yelling at me, I was content too. Now all I wanted was to see him try and get it on Hikari.

*~*Hikari's POV*~*

My head tilted back slightly as I let the water caress my face, drowning in the wonderful feel that it brought to my tense muscles. Kami, how I loved warm showers. I wasn't exactly in a rush to get out either. My birthday was today, and guaranteed that idiot Deidara had planned something "wonderful" for me. Birthdays weren't my thing. In all honesty, it was just another day, that just so happened to be the day that I was born…twenty one years ago… Sure celebrating it back then, and my first year of life was maybe okay, but anywhere after that was just…eh. Especially since I was hittin' the big number now. Past the big two-oh.

Dammit.

With little more than a frustrated sigh, I turned the water off, and stepped out of the shower, shivering as the cold air hit my body—leaving goose bumps in its wake. Without looking into the mirror that was fogged, but had a message written in it, I grabbed a towel and waltzed carelessly into my bedroom. After all, it was my room, and I had enough right to imagine that if I hadn't answered the door, nobody would just walk right in and wait for me to get out of the shower, right? Wrong.

Of course, being in my still half-asleep state, I ignored the figure dressed in his "lounge-wear"—so Leader-sama liked to call it—and smoothed my way over to my armoire. Glancing up into the mirror, I took a deep breath and jumped, finally noting the blonde haired explosives expert who was perched on the edge of my bed, a box in his hands.

"Mornin' birthday girl, yeah." His smile seemed to light up the room, but that wouldn't push the fact that I was currently standing in nothing but a towel with him staring at me. No, that wasn't going to work.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" I half screeched, pulling the towel tighter around my body, attempting to cover myself from his view. Of course, I hadn't realized that this pulled it up just a bit in the back, and seeing as I still had my back turned to him, well, let's just say he got a tiny little peek at certain…areas.

"I'm enjoying the view, of course, mm." His smirk widened, and I knew something stupid was going to come out of that obnoxious mouth of his. "Nice ass, Hikari-chan, hmm." The lotion bottle on my dresser made contact with the side of his head, in turn making him groan in pain. However, as much as I wanted it to be, he wasn't done yet. "Oh? Some lotion for me to rub all over you? My, my Hikari, getting a little bold, aren't we, yeah?" He chuckled, not long before I grabbed the throw pillow that had been lying down next to the lotion. This time—much to my relief, I was able to smother him long enough to grab a bra and a pair of underwear from my drawers.

"Dei-Dei?" He tilted his head to my un-posed question after detaching the pillow from his face. "Get. Out. Now."

I had no prevail, Deidara only stood from his spot and walked over to me, the box between his side and his arm. A blush lit my features when he was standing over me, his mouth at my ear. "But Hika-koi, I have something for you, mm. I can't give it to you if I leave." His voice was barely a whisper, and not gunna lie—it made me hot all over like the fourth of July. Leave it to the stupid blonde menace to know everything that turned me on without even thinking.

"Deidara, please get away from my person space, and then you can give me what it is you have to, okay?" I tilted my head as if trying to get away from him, and I saw the pout form on his face. Nonetheless, he backed away, holding the box out for me. "What is it?" The box was long and black, and if I guessed correctly, I'd say it was some type of clothing…Oh god… Deidara buying me clothes….AGH.

"Just open it, hmm. I promise you'll like it!" The smile re-appeared on his face, but this time it wasn't a playful smirk, just a quick twitch of his lips, or that sadistic smile he got when he used his art on towns and villages. No, this was a one hundred percent perfect smile that had my hear tracing a hundred miles a minute. I couldn't say no to that.

With a skeptical look in my eyes, I began to gently take the delicately tied bow off, making sure to be careful with it. I thought it was kinda pretty…and it wasn't all too flashy either. I could definitely use it as a bracelet, anklet or necklace—provided that I was willing to take the time and recreate the beautiful bow that had once been. IN ANYCASE! The lid to the box popped open on its own, signaling that whatever had been in there was obviously too big for the box.

That meant a lot of fabric…Which could've meant one of two things. Either Deidara got me something extremely practical—something I had doubted—orrrrr he had bought a plethora of unimportant and _extremely_ unpractical items and stuffed them into a box. I was inclined to believe the latter, however when the lid came completely off, my breath was caught in my throat. The simplest black dress lay carefully in the box, its x-shaped halter top hanging slightly out of the edge of the box. With stunned-and slightly wary—movements, I pulled the rest of the dress out, thinking it would be some skimpy dress that showed my ass. Sadly—or rather, happily—mistaken, I took note to the fact that the dress came just above my knees. It was definitely something I would wear. Of course, the sparkly design on the front could have been discarded…I wasn't one for the sparkles…

There was no way in hell that the smug bastard was going to find out I actually liked it though. "Dei-chan, it's pretty, I'll give you that…and for once, you picked something _somewhat_ anti-sluttish. I applaud you." I laid the dress down on my bed, freezing when I remembered that I had absolutely no clothing on...and the always horny bastard was sitting on the edge of said bed…the tongue in his palm waggling about.

"Aren't you going to put it on, hm?" Deidara's head tilted to the side a bit, as he waited for the answer that he expected to be a yes. I swear, the look I had given him would have been to die for laughing if anyone else had seen it.

` "Dei-Dei, you don't expect me to wear a dress? You don't honestly believe that I would wear this unless completely necessary?" He shrugged, pointing to the calendar on the wall.

"It is necessary, yeah. It's your birthday Hikari-chan. So let's get that dress on you, hm?" Deidara should have known better…regardless of if he was my…boyfriend—I still had trouble getting used to the word—or not, I wasn't about to let him see me naked. Not yet anyway. As soon as his fingers made contact with the exposed skin of my thigh, he was flying through the door, with a swift, chakra-enhanced kick.

I'd like to see him get me into that thing now!

…or maybe I'd just put it on anyway… just to humor _my_ curiosity.

* * *

At this point it was hard for me to decipher the difference between what came from my drunken state and what was actually a reality. Those around me seemed to be naught more than fucked up blurs, all stumbling and falling over one-another, swearing, dancing, fighting, doing pretty much anything you could do without killing someone when you were under the influence...The only person who I was certain was sober, and hadn't had one drink was Tsuki-chan…but… maybe I was wrong? She had disappeared long ago, muttering something under her breath about crap music and anxiety. I couldn't remember…probably because I too, was fucked up beyond all belief. Just two shots of hard liquor, that was it… Damn, I guess my drinking head really was that bad…

I couldn't discriminate any people in the room, save for Hidan. It was very simply the fact that he was even more obnoxious and annoying when he was drunk and therefore deserved every drunken kick and or punch that I delivered to him. All of their voices sounded the same to me. All of their standard issue clothing blended together. It was ridiculous! Hadn't any of them heard of originality? Owning more than one outfit was perfectly acceptable, people! Especially on days when you're just…yah'know…chillen'… but there I go, on a liquor laced rant that really could be any less interesting.

And yet, throughout this entire mess, I had failed to locate my blonde haired lover. I was almost a hundred percent certain that he had started out the party by my side, downing a good three or four mixed concoctions that I wouldn't dare ever try, but somewhere down the road, he had completely disappeared. I started to worry. Had he ditched me? On _my birthday _none the less. Tch. So much for staying in a monotonous relationship. My heart began to pound at the thought, and the real effects of the drinks I had swallowed earlier had really started to kick in. I would later found out that I was one hell of a sloppy, angry drunk. Great.

My feet seemed to try and trip me with every step I took—as if they were bent on ending my life right then and there. Every time I looked down, the floor blended with my feet and I would stumble a bit into someone, cursing at them for not watching their steps, even though I was the one at fault. My legs felt like putty, but I didn't complain. My straggled footsteps eventually led me into the lap of someone, whose face I couldn't see. It had gotten unnecessarily dark in the large room, and everything was currently spinning. Definitely not a plus.

A groan left my lips as a sort of nauseous feeling coursed its way over me, and the person below me stiffened. "You okay birthday girl, yeah?" I could never ever mistake his voice, even if I was intoxicated beyond all reason. All I could provide was a quick, curt nod that only made everything worse. The more I moved, the more it hurt. "Perhaps we should go into my room, hmm? Where it's not so loud and stuff, yeah?" Deidara's fingers danced on the exposed skin of my shoulders, due to the black dress that he had bought me for this occasion. Of course, when he first presented it, I had refused childishly, and even gone so far as to throwing the box in his face, shouting at him to get away and let me sleep in on my special day. After a few moments of persuasion however, he had somehow managed to get me into the damned thing, and I had to admit, it was mad comfortable.

It provided easy access as well…

If I wasn't so plastered, the blush that I felt rising would have become extremely apparent against my ivory toned skin. "But…wha 'bout er'yone else?" My words slurred together and god damn did I sound like a hot mess...

"They're all too drunk to realize that you're gone, Hikari-chan, yeah. Don't worry, hmm." Why did he sound so damn sober? It wasn't fair! Maybe it was just something acquired from spending so long with a bunch of people who did nothing but drink on their spare time? Perhaps if I practiced thinking with a clear…No…no, no more drinking after tonight.

"Mmmkaay." Deidara's hands wrapped firmly around my lower waist, so he could pick me up like a father carrying his child.

"Hikari-chan, wrap your arms around my neck, and your legs around my waist please, yeah." He gazed intently into my half-lidded eyes; waiting for me to do said task—which mind you I did none too gracefully. With a few shit-faced giggles, and unintelligible slurs, I was able to wrap both appendages haphazardly around the body of my lover. He didn't complain, nor did he make any noises, but I couldn't argue it. The less arguments, the better.

Deidara dropped me gently against his wondrous bed, and although I could see that he intended to walk away and perhaps change, or grab something from his bathroom, I refused to tear my arms away from his neck. I tried to pull him closer, giggling and slurring something that even I couldn't make sense of. I tugged on him roughly, and watched as he started to fall forward, expecting him to just lay himself right on top of me, but of course, he wouldn't allow that. He caught himself, placing his hands at either side of my head, his nose pressed gently against mine, and his hair creating a curtain around both of our faces. A few more giggles came from my lips, as my hot, alcohol laced breath cascaded across his face.

"Dei-Dei!" I squealed out, running my fingers lazily through tendrils of long blonde hair. He grunted in response, nipping at my top lip teasingly. "Yer face…." I hiccupped none too gracefully, and laughed some more, "it looks li'e yuh got one eye!" So, perhaps in a drunken state I wasn't the brightest crayon in the box. With our faces pressed so close together, I had gone cross-eyed, making it seem as if he indeed only had one eye.

"You're wasted Hikari-chan, hmm." He observed, showering my hot cheeks in sweet, innocent kisses, and I could distinctly hear the sound of his palm's mouths munching down on the sheets below us. Deidara let out a sigh, trying to step away from me, but I couldn't let him go. Not yet.

"Where d'yah think yer goin', bub!" The words came out as a growl, even though I hadn't intended it to be such in anyway. "Wha' abou' meh birthday sex? Mmmm?" At this point, I had no control over what I was saying. I most definitely wouldn't have suggested it, regardless of how much I might have wanted it, because the practical side of me would have listed the most horrid repercussions. Reminder to self; No drinking.

"Hika-chan, hmm…I don't think that's such a good idea…considering the fact that your drunk, yeah. Let's wait until you…"

"NOOO! Dei-Dei I want you!" My lips pressed fervently against his in an attempt to shut him up. I just wanted him to get it over with. I wanted him to finally claim me as mine. Maybe it was the alcohol speaking, but it didn't matter anymore. I just wanted to feel him, let him take control of me. God dammit, what was he waiting for.

As soon as I pressed against him harder—our lips still molded to one another—I felt him stiffen, and press back—moaning just barely into our kiss. This was it. This was what I had been waiting for. Deidara gave up on trying to get away, instead moving his lower half onto the bed so his knees were resting at mine, with his hands moved just a bit lower, so they were at my shoulders. They gripped tightly at the sheets beneath me, as if trying to hold in that want he had expressed. That wasn't going to fly.

My lips broke away from his, so I could breathe, but he took it as an opportunity to rid myself of my dress. His fingers worked quickly on the halter strap of the dress, untying the gentle bow-knot with ease, before he moved his hands down to my thighs, where the hem of the dress had hiked up a bit. He caressed my neck with butterfly kisses, as the mouths on his palms began to lick and nibble at the sensitive skin on the outside of my thighs. It took all I had not to scream out in pleasure—so I settled for squirming a bit and whimpering. It felt too damn good. Like I had three men using their mouths in ways that I had only imagined in my wildest dreams. "Hikari-chan, yeah…" He lifted his head to look me in the eyes; his gorgeous ocean blues eyes mesmerizing. He stopped pulling my dress up—just above my waist, exposing the lace boy shorts I was wearing—and took in a shaky breath. He was nervous. "Are you sure you want me to do this, hmm? We can wait till you've sobered up, yeah."

Shaking my head quickly, I tugged at Deidara's shirt, indicating that I just wanted him to screw me. He definitely got the message. Deidara ripped the smooth black dress from my body, sending a cold brush of air against my body. Goosebumps appeared on my skin, but feeling his hands kneading at my breasts through my bra was enough to send them away.

"Dei-Dei…" His name was naught more than a moan from my lips, that fell carelessly into the air, following my fingers in the blonde bombers hair again. I pulled him closer, needing the feel of his hands on me, the feel of his lips caressing every inch of skin that they could get to.

I found myself reeling with an exotic pleasure that I hadn't known I could feel before. Every single touch was like electricity to my veins—I was so _sensitive._ I didn't understand why…I didn't want to know why. I just wanted more.

Deidara's hands grew shakier with each inch they got closer to the clasp of my bra, his anticipation for what taking off the restraint would reveal was almost radiating off of his very being. I could barely see his beautiful blue eyes, for the simple fact that they were lidded from lust, but Deidara had made a point to gaze into my eyes the entire time. "Hikari-chan…your skin is _so soft,_ hmm." Nibbling at the very sensitive skin of my earlobe, he managed to undo my bra, and toss it carelessly to the side.

Hot breath fanned across the skin of newly revealed breasts, before enveloping both in rough, but gentle hands. Uncoordinated mouths began nipping and licking at hardened nipples, erupting a groan of pleasure from pale lips, parted just barely in a lust filled daze.

I was so far gone.

"Deidara…I wan' more…please…" He had me where he wanted me. I was a slave to his ministrations. I couldn't hold out for much longer and he hadn't even started the good—

My thoughts were stopped in their tracks as he removed a hand from my breast, and allowed it to travel downwards, to the only thing that I had made sure to keep sacred to my being. A devilish smirk lit up my lover's features, a small sound came from my throat akin to a whimper of delight, and his fingers delved underneath the hem of my panties to softly massage at my sweet spot. A new feeling washed over my entire being and I swear I turned animalistic. My nails dug deep into the skin of his shoulders as I tried my hardest to arch into his hand—to make him go farther down—to make him push as far as he could into me.

Something flashed in his eyes at that moment, something stronger than the lust that was there before, and rather than the lazy lustful looks I had been given before, a blazing fire lit behind those aqua orbs, and he moved two fingers around that one spot in a circular motion, pressing hard at certain points. My breathing was off—I couldn't find an easy way to remember to breathe because every time I had tried to take one normal breath he would surprise me with a new combination of kisses, rubs and nips that had me gasping for more. "Tell me what you want, birthday girl, yeah." he whispered hotly against my ear. His fingers slid up and down my wet folds, my mind not comprehending that he was about to have me begging. "Tell me how you want me to fill you, and make you feel sooo damn good, hmm." That devilish smirk of his grew wider, and of course, before I could respond, he had slipped one slim finger inside of me.

A strangled cry fell out of my mouth—encouraging the cocky bastard to only mess with me further. The tongue in the palm of his hand began stroking at my sensitive nub, while his finger worked at massaging a moving around my virgin walls. Each cry of his name…each groan of bliss that came from me pushed him to slide his finger out faster—add another so I had two penetrating my core, and have the tongues on both of his hands lapping away at my clit and my breast. His lips were pressed firmly against mine, nibbling and sucking at my bottom lip to the point where I was certain I would bruise. "C'mon sweetheart, tell me, yeah." A knot was forming in my stomach, and at first, I didn't like the feeling. It was foreign…but it soon started to spread all over my body…I felt like I was floating in the air…I was about to hit cloud nine…God did this man know how to use his hands…and his tongues for that matter.

"G-god Deidara!" My hips bucked hard into his hand but he pressed down, keeping me firmly planted against the bed. For whatever reason, this feeling kept me from staying still. I couldn't help squirming around, and trying to lift my hips up to meet his fingers each time they pressed into me. "You're gunna make me—"

Deidara stopped everything at once, ruining my high, although I could still feel the effects it had on me. The air around me felt amazing against my hot skin, and each gentle touch from it made my heart beat faster. But I wanted Dei-Dei to make my heart race. I whimpered pathetically, glancing at my blonde boy to see what his eyes were focusing on.

Still in a semi-drunken state—although the effects had started to wear off—I tilted my head curiously at the sight of red. "Whatdya do, silly boy? Bite yuh own finger?"I giggled at the thought, but Deidara remained completely serious.

"I knew you were tight, Hikari-chan, but you didn't say you were a virgin, yeah." He sounded sincerely mortified that I was still innocent—or rather had been.

"You neva asked, Dei-Dei…" Deidara seemed to glare at the blood that coated his fingers, but shoved the entire thought to the side—changing up his game plan from before. My high hadn't left from only moments earlier, so even having his hands gently holding my own almost sent me over the edge. Deidara slowly settled himself over me, and intertwined his fingers with mine. I was confused as to what exactly he had in mind.

"Hikari-chan, I don't want to hurt you… but I want you so damn bad, hmm." That lustful look was back in his eyes, but something else was hidden behind them. Was it concern? I couldn't tell…

Deidara softly laid his head against my shoulder, before positioning himself between my legs and prodding something hard against the inside of my thigh. If my blush could have gotten any redder I was sure it had right then. He took in a deep breath before pressing against my moistened folds, nipping at my ear again. "Tell me if I hurt you too much, Hikari-chan, hmm. I'll stop, mm." With a somewhat trained efficiency, Deidara started to push himself inside of me. The pain of it was nothing I had ever imagined…nothing I had ever experienced as a kunoichi. It felts as if I was being ripped apart from the inside…spread passed my limits, and it was certainly no help that Deidara was 'well endowed'.

I dug my nails into the backs of his hands, biting back a scream that wanted to escape. Tears threatened to leak from my eyes, but I had to be strong. I knew the pain would start to pass. Deidara hissed lowly, kissing up and down my jaw line in an attempt to distract me from the pain. His lips touched mine in chaste kisses as he murmured sweet apologies over and over—promises that the pain would be gone soon.

I hadn't doubted him for one moment, because after he had completely entered, the pain faded away into a pleasure that was so much greater than what I had felt before. The air in the room suddenly seemed too thick to breathe. Everything around me seemed so surreal. It couldn't have been a reality… Oh who the hell was I kidding, I felt that man inside of me and damn it felt good—reality or not, I wanted more!

From some sort of natural instinct, I wrapped my legs around his bare waist—his entire ensemble being tossed carelessly to a corner somewhere throughout our escapade—and dug my heels into his back—begging him to go harder. Deidara's hair tickled my shoulders as he ducked his head—seeming to focus on the subtle bounce of my breasts each time he thrust into me.

I tossed my head back and let another erotic cry fly from my lips, arching and twisting my body so I could get him as far as possible inside of my body. I could feel him throbbing—I could feel it with every rough thrust of his hips against mine. Our scents began to mingle together; I could no longer tell that we had at one point been separated. It felt as if we were meant to be like this—connected together—and that we had never been, nor were we ever meant to be separated. My heart beat faster with each passing pant that I let out. Deidara's hot breath hit my skin with each fast intake and outtake of air.

Carnal grunts. Groans and moans radiated from the two of us. Our skin slapped together in some sort of song, and our bodies contorted to each others in a none to gentle dance.

"Hika-chan…you're so fucking tight, yeah." I dove into his hair, pulling him closer so I could kiss the hell out of him. I could feel my stomach turning again. I could feel the desperate thrusts that Deidara gave each time he pounded into me. He was close…and I was too.

"Dei-Dei! God, fuck me…yes!" I growled, pulled him closer and allowed that euphoria to hit me like a wave on a hot summer day spent at the beach. The world around me became spotted with bright colours—I couldn't see straight, and if my grip had gotten any tighter on him, I might have killed him. Deidara's teeth bit hard against my neck—but not yet hard enough to mark me. Either way it sent me reeling farther over the edge than I already was.

He wouldn't give me a break. He just kept pounding into me, until the very end of my climax, when he started to slow down. I felt him pull out, but he was still rubbing his erection against me, his satisfaction almost hitting its peak. I wouldn't realize that he was trying to avoid getting me pregnant by doing so until later. With a final cry of my name, and a sharp, rough, bite to my neck, Deidara released himself.

"Deidara…" I couldn't find my voice, but it didn't matter. I had just made love with the one man that meant most to me.

"Shhh…Don't speak, yeah." Deidara let his hand rest on the curve of my hips, pulling me flush against his body after laying on his side. His head rested gently in the space between my neck and my shoulder, nuzzling lovingly. I had done a horrible job of stifling my yawn. "Don't go to sleep just yet, sweetheart, hmm." He purred, allowing the tongue in his palm to trail sloppy wet kisses up my side. "We're not done, yeah."

My eyes temporarily widened, before I tilted my head just a bit to look into his eyes. What the hell was the man talking about? "What do you…"

"Round two, baby, hm." His infamous smirk lit his features and I knew my night was going to be long, hard, and full of pleasure.

* * *

_**Well, there's the lemon many of you *coughcoughkira-sancough* have been waiting for.**_

_**I apologize for any errors in spelling or grammar, I just wanted to get this chapter out because, sadly, it's going to be a while before I update. I'm trying to fix my writing style, so it may take a while for me to post, and work on Reach in general.**_

_**Also, AP testing, SAT's and Finals are coming up, so I'm gunna be really busy with testing…However, I'll try to update when I can… or at least let you guys know how far along I've gotten.**_

_**Anyway, thank you all you faithful readers!**_

_**Please, no more trolls? If you have a problem, P.M. me directly, so I can explain to you, if need be explained (like in my first authors note up there^) or so I can fix the problem. Once again, thank you!**_

_**Love Always,**_

_**Mariah Love **_


	11. Before The Worst

_**Hey guys, so since I'm still working on my writing style, and such, I don't really think that the quality of this chapter will be at its best, but I'm trying. Also, From this point on, I'll be writing in third person. I think it will work better, rather than switching through different POV's. Or maybe I'll just keep it in Tsuki's POV from this point on :/ except for filler chapters. I dunno! **_

_**Please bear…bare?…with me guys. I realize that my initial tone for the story kinda…just died, and that's not exactly what I intended. I really want this to be a more serious story, but, at the same time, I want this to be somewhat humourous Especially when it comes to Tsuki. It should be so much more serious and saddening when you're reading Tsuki's POV, and yet, I just don't think it's been there. **_

_**Also, I've strayed a bit from the plot.. not that there really was a perfect one set in place in the beginning. Either, way, this will be fixed, and I promise you guys this will come out so much better. Can I have your guys' thoughts on all of this in a review or pm please? It'll help me alot.**_

_**Thank you all so much for your patience! And now I give you, Chapter ten.**_

* * *

**Chapter 10**

**Before The Worst.**

Why did it hurt so much? That throbbing pain in her head…it just wouldn't go away…

She groaned, trying to manoeuvre her body in some way so that she could lessen the pressure on her skull, but the movement only made it worse. _Everything_ was searing with pain. Hikari let out a distressed moan, remembering why she didn't _ever_ drink. Even on special occasions—not that she would really consider her birthday a special occasion. It was waking up with hangovers like _this_ from one simple clean shot, that made her want to stab herself in the ears with a spoon. Quite literally too.

Her thoughts drifted to her younger roommate momentarily, and in the back of her mind, she wondered if this was what the girl felt like when she went through one of her episodes. Kami bless her if it was. Hikari put her hands over her face, and dragged them down to her chin, before grunting, cracking her eyes open a bit. She was met with a very deep black wall, laden with red speckles—or what had appeared so in her mind—but she pushed it off as an illusion of her mind. There were no red specks on her walls, as far as she remembered. Now that she thought of it…her walls weren't black either. They were sort of a cream colour.

_That's what I get for drinking. So stupid…_

Her eyes closed again, the golden amber orbs slightly glazed with whatever remains of the hangover were left, before she stretched her arms out. Her right appendage reached far enough to hit something hard, and rather hairy, but her mind didn't process it. Her first reaction was that Tsuki had had another nightmare, and crawled into Hikari's bed, something she did when she was too terrified to sleep in her own bed, and so there would be no need to freak out.

"I'm sorry Tsuki-chan." She mumbled, the sound louder than she had thought hitting her head rather roughly. Why was it so _strident? _ God be damned if that lasted much longer.

'What do you mean Tsuki-chan, hmm? She's not in here is she, yeah?" The groggy, yet surprisingly sexy voice pounded her brain even more than what her own voice had, but she ignored the pain. What the hell was Deidara doing in her bed? Let alone…Her eyes snapped open scanning where her hand was—a very toned chest that had been covered by his flowing long hair, due to the angle he was sleeping_. _What the hell was the bastard doing naked in her bed?

"DEIDARA!" She winced a bit under the octave of her voice, and dropped it down to a soft, angst filled whisper. "What the fuck do you think you're doing in _my _bed? What the fuck is this dammit?" The blonde haired bomber could only smirk in response, his body shuffling a little closer to her side of the bed, as his arm came to lie lazily on her waist. His head nuzzled against the area right under her breast—which she had just taken into notice was exposed for the snarky bastard to see—and she could hold it in no longer. "Get. The. Fuck. Out." Her voice was barely above a whisper, but it came out in a deadly hiss all the same, her eyes boring holes into the blonde head, as her hand moved swiftly to smack his arm away.

Not that she minded how good it felt to be so close to him…nor how amazing it felt to have the tongue in his palm drawing circles on her skin…

"No can do, Hikari-chan, hmm." She could feel his cocky smirk light his lips as he kissed at her stomach, and glanced up at her. "This is my room, hn." Hikari stared at him blankly. Then stared a little more…a little moooooreee….

"WHAT THE HELL? DEIDARA GET THE FUCK OUT!" Her arms stretched out to push him away, but she only succeeded in shoving herself off, landing to the ground with quite a loud _thump._ Rubbing her head from the throbbing pain that had resurfaced ten-fold, Hikari glared up at her blonde lover, his smirk still situated on his lips.

Those perfectly shaped lips….

"Get that friggin' smirk off your face and tell me what the hell you did to me! I swear to Kami, Deidara if you so much as even…" Deidara's hand went up and he reached down of the edge of his bed, gently caressing the side of Hikari's face, and she couldn't help but to blush. Especially when the hand licked at her cheek.

"Koi-chan, you were the one who came onto me, hmm. I suggested that we wait until you sobered up but you _insisted, _hm. I _couldn't_ resist, especially with the way you were kissing me." His smile grew wider, as he felt Hikari's face warm up. "I think you need some more relaxation, Hikari, yeah." Deidara leaned his head down so his lips brushed softly against hers, and his free hand reached to grope at her exposed breast.

His fingers kneaded ever so gently against the soft skin, and two squeezed gently on one of her pert nipples. A rush of air left Hikari's lips without her consent, and she had to bite her lip to keep from moaning as the mouth in his palm began nibbling and sucking at her breast.

"Deidara get the fuck away. Whatever happened last night was a mistake. I was drunk, incoherent, and it will _never _happen again. Do you understand? I will never do this again." With her hangover a bit more manageable, the white haired kunoichi stood from the floor, and gathered her clothing, cursing at the pain in her groin area. Regardless of how much she lo—err, liked Deidara, she could never forgive him for taking away the one shred of innocence she had left.

She had been too occupied with trying to put her clothes on to notice the hurt look that darted across the blonde bomb experts aqua eyes, before he moved into a sitting position, the blanket around his waist barely covering his lower body. He watched with an intensity as his lover dressed quickly, cursing and mumbling under her breath about how stupid she had been to trust him, how stupid the entire idea was to have the party, and other things that hit him like a brick directly to his heart.

In all honesty, he had never felt so lost. He had never wanted to please anyone more than he wanted to please Hikari. It was a strange feeling to him—this hurt that came with the disapproval of someone that he…had his eyes set on. He felt as if he'd lose her completely if he didn't do everything right. It was something so foreign to him, but he didn't want to give it up. For the first time in a long time, he felt like he could belong to something more than a criminal organization, and he had just blew it. Unknowingly, his fingers clenched at the sheets, and he called out to her as she opened his door.

"Hey, Hikari-chan, hm."

Her head wiped around violently as she glared.

That look was enough to kill him from the inside.

A pang of depression tugged at his mind. _ Why does it hurt so much?_

"If it makes any difference to you…I didn't want to…but I took it slow…I was careful with you, un. I wanted it to be perfect, because it was your first time and all, but I guess I was drunk too, hm." He glanced up at her through his eyelashes and caught her slight change in expression before it turned right back into that vicious glare.

"You still took my innocence when I wasn't coherent. That's rape, Deidara, no matter how you want to look at it." With her words stinging the male left near ready to rip the sheets apart, Hikari walked towards her room, a twang of remorse in her heart.

Perhaps she had taken it a step to far…After all, he did it with the best intentions. And didn't he say that _she_ was the one who made him? Her golden eyes took a quick shift in the direction of his room, and for a moment, she could've sworn she heard the breaking of set clay on his bedroom floor.

_Just imagining things…_

"I should probably check on Tsuki…"

_ Just an excuse to get away from the pain._

_ Why does it hurt? I didn't do anything wrong…did I?_

_ Maybe I should apologize…_

Hikari groaned. She had never been faced with this sort of situation before. It was annoying to be put bluntly. Her fingers lingered on the knob of her door, asa she pressed her forehead against the wood, and took in a deep breath to regain her composure.

She'd go and apologize…as soon as her headache was completely gone. Her words were unnecessary and she knew it, so she'd fix the mess that she had created.

After a nice hot shower…

* * *

Silvery-magenta eyes watched with uncertainty as the white-haired woman paced the bedroom before her, calculating how fast her steps were, and judging her stress by the statistic. She came out to twenty quick steps for every mini-monologue to herself. She hadn't been able to exactly catch what was going on in her friends head, but she couldn't quite let it go. Not yet at least.

"Hik-kari-ch-chan…are you ok-kay?" She crossed her legs and leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees and her chin in her hands. For a moment she was worried that she had said something wrong, for her friend simply ignored her at first. Her heart began to beat rapidly, her head began to spin, and that obnoxious voice in her head started to nag again.

_Why even bother? You're only going to make things worse._

Tsuki's eyes burned with unshed tears, as she bit her lip to keep from crying out. This was about Hikari. Not her. She tilted her head a bit and pushed the voice to the back of her mind.

_Please not now._

Hikari stopped her pacing, let a deep breath come out passed her pale pink lips, and shook her head, a small smile reaching her face.

"It's nothing, Tsuki-chan. Just some personal issues. Don't worry, I've got it covered." Hikari took a few steps over to the younger girl's bed, and reached out, ruffling the already messy locks in a sisterly manner. She couldn't help it. Tsuki was almost like the sister she never had. Almost. There were still some things that she'd have to work around with the girl.

Tsuki's eyes flashed to a brilliant green for a moment, causing Hikari to stare at her, shocked, but no sooner had it happened, did she play it off as a trick of her imagination.

"Hik-kari-ch-chan, you're always help-ping me. Always t-trying t-to f-fix me, even if-f I c-can't-t b-be f-fixed-d. Let-t me t-try to f-fix you. Let-t me t-try to help-p you." Tsuki stared at her roommate, and her closest friend with a sincerity that she hadn't known was there. She wanted Hikari to feel comfortable sharing her problems, to have her feel as if she wasn't alone—god only knew that you couldn't really share your feelings with anyone around this damned place.

The white haired kunoichi pulled Tsuki in for a tight hug, as her smile that was more of an unconvincing grin turned into a fully fledged beam of happiness. It was always good to know that there was someone there for you.

"It's alright Tsu-chan, and thank you for being here for me, but this is very simply something that I have to fix on my own. Besides, it's not that much of a big deal. I'll be back later, Kid." Her chest tightened when she blew it off as something trivial. She knew it was something more.

Things like that weren't just "no big deal." It was that exact attitude that would ruin the one something that she wasn't sure if she'd know what to do when she lost it. Honestly, Hikari didn't know if she'd cry, walk away a little depressed, or basically just say fuck it. She had never really had the experience...Well maybe a few times, but they never really counted, because there wasn't the feeling that she had for a certain blonde haired bomber. Hikari wasn't about to find out though.

With a determination, she strutted her way over to a specific room, a few doors down to her own. She had a vague idea of how she would take care of the issue, provided that Deidara was in the kind of mood that she had surmised. Of course, there was always the possibility that Deidara's reaction to the entire thing was going to be the exact opposite, in which case she would be royally fucked.

However, her mind deterred from that idea, and she knocked softly against the wooden door that lead into her lover's dorm. She waited...then waited some more...

An exasperated sigh came from the other side of the door, and Hikari could hear some distinctive shuffling around, along with a few mumbled curses. Her head titled slightly, but she straightened it back out, a gasp of surprise leaving her lips.

The room behind the blonde was in complete shambles. What appeared to have once been prototypes for new bombs were shattered, littering the ground with sharp pieces; papers fluttered a bit as per the wind provided by the fan, and she could make out the head of some sort of sculpture sticking from the tip of the trashcan, that had clearly been knocked over in this fit of rage.

It had only been an hour or two...did her words really crush him that much? Her heart clenched at the thought of being the reason that his precious art was destroyed.

"What do you want, uhn?" His voice was harsh, and when Hikari looked towards his face, she noted his flushed cheeks and somewhat dishevelled and sopping wet locks. It looked like a piece of one of his sculptures might have blown up a bit too close to him, because a part of his shirt was singed, along with some fringes of hair. He had taken the mess of his room outdoors...but where? At this point it didn't matter.

Hikari pushed passed Deidara with a distressed sigh, and began to pick up the papers that made a nice blanket on the floor. It was starting to bother her. She glanced at some of the papers, trying to decipher their contents, but anything that had been written was scribbled out or drawn over with crude drawings of soon to be prototypes. Her mind tried to make some sort of word from what little of the character she could see, but she couldn't. With papers in hand, she turned to face Deidara, who had since closed his door and was now leaning against it.

"Are these of any importance to you?" Her only reply was a cold stare, and an impatient tap of his foot. "Guess I'll put them on the workbench then..." Trying to occupy herself was very simply a scape goat to avoid the awkward silence that filled the air.

"What do you want, hmm." He repeated his question from earlier, and moved a bit closer to Hikari. She nearly stepped back, but refrained. This was Deidara! The man that she lo..er..liked very muchly. He wouldn't hurt her intentionally. Even though he sure as hell looked like he wanted too.

"I'm here to apologize Deidara. I know that what i said was...cruel and unnecessary. I was just shocked, albeit a little pissed, but shocked none the less. I can't deny that for a second I was just a bit scared. I've never been in a situation like that." She averted her eyes to the left, to focus on a particularly interesting sunspot when Deidara's stare was too much for her nerves. "I was drunk, and I couldn't remember anything, so my default reaction is to make sure it would never happen again. It's not that I _don't _want to do it again, I just don't want to do it under those circumstances. I know I was harsh in saying that you raped me, but after thinking about it, I realize I was somewhat wrong."

A scoff from the bomb specialist made her stop and look up to gauge his reaction—which was a curt roll of his eyes, and the cross of his arms over his chest. Her eyes moved to the floor this time.

"Either way, Dei-chan..." She took in a deep breath, feeling stupid for having to explain her ridiculous actions from earlier, "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean any of it." Letting the breath she had taken in out, she looked up, just realizing how close he actually was to her.

_How did he...without me...what?_

"You really had me going fucking crazy, uhn. I thought you weren't going to talk to me...I don't know why but it made me do all this, yeah..." His hand waved over the mess that was his room, before the same hand came to cup her cheek softly. "I think I love you, koi-chan, uhn."

Her heart skipped a few beats, her eyes watering if only the slightest bit. She had no words to say...It would be cheesy to repeat his words, but now that she thought about it, there was no doubt in her mind that she very well might have loved the damned guy.

It would only make sense after all, and Hikari loved things that made sense.

She wrapped her arms tightly against his neck, her legs going around his waist as she buried her face in the crook of his neck, muttering apologies for her behaviour from before, over and over again. Deidara couldn't help but to chuckle. "I forgive you Hikari, damn, hm."

She smiled against his neck, pulling away a bit, so she could look into those aqua eyes that she had come to adoure.

"I think I love you too, Dei-chan." She swept her lips across his for a gentle kiss; one that made Deidara's heart soar. "Two little side notes though?" His lips nibbled at her neck playfully as he grunted in response. "One, you really should clean up... and two, you should probably go see a counsellor about anger management." Deidara pulled his lips away from her neck, a disdainful look crossing his features as his lip turned up, and his eye brows scrunched together. Hikari's sheepish grin didn't go unnoticed as he tossed her to his bed, and growled out, "What the hell, hmm?"~

* * *

_**Well, well. We finished this chapter with a little HikaDei fluff! I really don't think this was really good, considering that I think Hikari's reaction was a bit extreme, but I coudn't help it. It proved for an interesting chapter...sort of kind of. Meh. Whatevs. **_

_**Please guys, Review and such pertaining to stuff written in the first authors note, and just to review the chapter in general :D**_

_**THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! YOU AHVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE YOU GUYS!**_

_**Love always, **_

_**Mariah Love~**_

_**P.S. LOOK ON MY PROFILE FOR A SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!**_


	12. Hey Thur, Hawt Stuffs

_**Hey there guys!**_

_**I apologize for the fact that it's been pretty much over a year since I've last updated, but my life has been ridiculously hectic, and therefore, I haven't had the chance to write much. However! I want ya'll to know that I haven't given up on Reach, or you, or any of my other stories, for that matter.**_

_**I'm going to start college on August 30th, but, as a fashion majour, I only have three classes, early on in the day, which gives me the rest of my time to work, and write for you guys! Chapter 11 is almost finished, I'm just editing some things. Expect a REAL update either later tonight, or tomorrow.**_

_**Another little note, I'm focusing on Tsuki from this point on, after all, this story was originally about her. There will be a ton of Dei-Hika fluff, and smexxing, but not as much as there has been...**_

_**This story is about to get a lot more serious, so buckle your seatbelts and prepare for an emotional roller coaster. Well... I hope it will be emotional to you guys as well.**_

_**Oh! Two more notes.**_

_**One: I'm going to be introducing like two or three more characters, that will really only be for cameo appearances.**_

_**Two: Since I'm cleaning this story up, is there anything so far that I have confused you guys about? If so, please let me know, and I'll answer the questions to the best of my ability!**_

_**I don't plan on re-writing the story, because it's 45k+ words and that's a lot to re-write -_- But everything from this point on will be neater, and not all over. I want to make your reading experience as comfortable(and occasionally uncomfortable) as possible. So, Without further ado, I bid thee farewell, and will see ya'll in the upcoming chapter.**_

_**Grazi, e Caio!**_

_**Mariah Love**_


	13. Electric Ghosts

_**Well guys, here's the very ,much anticipated, or at least I hope very much anticipated, Chapter 11! Okaay, so maybe it's a few days late, and a little shorter than usual, but it's up! I don't have much to say here, 'sides I'm going to put lyrics from the song that the title came from, whether or not the song itself had to do with the Chapter. I simply chose the title because i felt the song title fit the chapter. So yeah...the lyrics may or may not have anything to do with it. ^^" Without further ado, read on! Oh, and I don't own the song or Naruto.**_

_**Chapter 11~**_

_**Electric Ghosts.**_

_**~ What will it take to open up the gates?**_

_**Let down your hair, I'm climbing up to you.**_

_**Stay up late, do the things we want to.**_

_**If it's only tonight, it's alright with me.**_

_**Pardon me, what's the meaning of the dreams?**_

_**A secret lust in these hidden things?**_

_**Face to face, can you show me how you play?**_

_**And if it's only tonight, it's alright with me. ~**_

* * *

"_Daddy, where are we going?" She had let the question escape past her lips without really thinking about it over four times during the course of their fifteen minute walk that would knowingly grow in length. Her father hadn't answered her once, but each time, she had only thought he didn't hear her. She'd always believed that the twenty three year old man was going deaf, for whatever reason._

_ She provided a smile when she glanced up at the black haired male, expecting him to know immediately that it was meant for him. She could feel the pent up angst in his aura, and figured that a soft grin would cheer him up. _

_ Shiro kept his head straight and pulled his daughter along. He wasn't in the mood for cute gestures, or simple questions, no matter how much he wanted to allow her to take him away into her own little care free world. _

_ His reddish eyes glanced over the entire area they'd been trekking; darting over the canopies, and grazing the forest floor with a glare that would surely have killed off the plants had they paid close enough attention. The day was slowly disappearing, but that was the least of his worries. _

_ The escort group that had come along with him hadn't returned from scouting after they had felt a harmful presence. Trained in a manner that was "kill-and-go", Shiro began to worry that perhaps the enemy had been too strong for them._

_ "Tsuki, darling, did anyone follow you when Mirai dropped you off with me?" He questioned her with urgency, and, although she tried with all her might to remember, her answer was negative. Shiro sighed. _What could be holding them up?_ He paused, holding his daughters small, childish hand, and scanned the area for any aggressive aura's, for any being that may cause harm to _her_, to be more specific. His eyes narrowed just slightly, his body tensed, and his grip on her hand strengthened before he scooped her up into his arms. Using the chakra that he had been so careful to preserve for this exact reason, he launched himself into the trees, and very simply ran. He ran as far as his body would allow. Ran as far as was necessary to keep her away from danger. He pushed himself to his limits, and when he stopped to catch his breath, he realized that it was pointless._

_ Tsuki gazed up at her father, fear evident in those innocent metallic pink eyes, and for once, he didn't hide his own fear. He didn't try to hide any of his emotions anymore. But he could make her believe that everything would be okay all the same. It was the least he could do._

_ "Darling, I want you to do me a huge favour." He bent down so he was eye level with her, and the fear in her eyes erased for just a moment. She had to be strong—had to take this mission he would give her quite seriously. She wouldn't want to let him down. Determination glittered behind her long lashes. He allowed himself a small smile before he pulled her against him for one last hug. His lips touched her cheeks and her forehead, he whispered that he loved her repeatedly, to which she answered with a similar, _I love you too, daddy.

_ "What's wrong daddy? What do I need to do?" She pressed her small, delicate, innocent, childish hands against his face, staring into his eyes—sharing her thoughts with his. He shook his head solemnly, standing to get away from her unspoken words. He didn't want her to read him._

_ "I want you to run, darling. Run." His piercing red eyes turned somewhat malicious now, but she wasn't scared of him. She was scared of his connotation. His eyes darted around, still searching for something that she couldn't see, and it only made her heart beat that much faster._

_ It was all her mother's fault, naturally. That selfish gypsy woman turned heiress to a throne she wanted for the fortune, and the fortune only. Tsuki was to inherit it if he were to die, regardless of if he was married to Tamiko._

_ "D-daddy...D-daddy, I c-can't leave you...I have nowhere else t-t-o go!" She gazed up at him with crystal pink eyes that began to sparkle with light tears. She couldn't be brave anymore. It was to terrifying. _Where could she go?

_ "I'll come for you darling. Just run. Get as far away from here as you can! When you get weak, hide yourself well."His eyes were scanning the area with more intensity, and they dissolved into a sharp hazardous green. _It wasn't supposed to happen so soon...We miscalculated. _Returning his attention to the petrified crystalloid pink eyes, he gently swept her bangs from her eyes. Handling her with the same tenderness that his mother had given him, he placed her chin in one of his large, calloused hands, and with the other wiped away the tears that had started to brim over the edges of her eyes. Even though he knew he was feeding her empty lies, and even though he knew that he couldn't get her, it was the reassurance that she needed. Even she knew that she would never see him again. _She's too young... This shouldn't be happening._ "Do you remember what I told you? How to disguise yourself?" Her eyes were a sparkling spring green; bright with trepidation and anxiety. She didn't want to say goodbye._

_ Slowly though, she nodded her head, and let out a heavy sob that made her small body shake and quiver. _Please...don't go...don't leave me daddy...

_ He could hear them coming closer, and she could feel their presence. It was malicious, angst filled and it made her want to shrivel up and die. Their bodies both stiffened out of fear like a rabbit being hunted. _

They can't see you if you don't move.

_There was no more time to say goodbye. Shiro shoved his daughter away quickly, in the opposite direction of the danger that was coming in way too hot. "Don't worry sweetheart...daddy will be right behi—" his eyes widened, and blood flew from his mouth, hitting the stuffed animal clutched in her arms. He fell to his knees and as a series of kunai flew towards his back, he closed his eyes, murmuring his final words. "Run, Tsuki...run."_

_ She couldn't run though. She was too scared. "Come out, come out sweet princess." _Daddy...why'd you leave me?

_Her eyes dulled to a deep forest green. She was dead on the inside now. There was nothing left for her. The footsteps got closer. She couldn't hear them over the ringing in her ears, but she sure as hell could feel them. Run, Tsuki._

_ Taking one last glance back at the man who was laying face first in a puddle of his own blood, she darted deeper into the forest. Her daddy gave her a mission and she was going to complete it no matter what._

I don't know why you try. You're just a worthless little bitch." _The voice had her stopping in her tracks. She glanced around. The malicious auras were still back where her father was. What was that?_

Don't stop running, idiot. Do you _want_ to die? Fail your father? _Her eyes narrowed into slits and she dropped on her knees holding her head as a pounding headache attacked her brain._

It won't go away...

_ Struggling to her feet, Tsuki continued to stumble and trip and run until she couldn't run anymore. Forming a few hand signs, she let out a tired breath, and pressed her fingers to the ground. It shook slightly, and black, sinewy strands of wispy air shot up from the dirt, before wrapping around her, and fading to match the scenery around her. _It will go away when the right person comes. Daddy said so...

_ It hurt so much. Why did it hurt so much. She closed her eyes, now back to metallic pink, and with a few last inhales, she allowed herself to fall into a deep sleep._ Maybe it will all go away...

My eyes flew open as a rush of air passed my lips. _It never went away did it?_ My fingers were splayed across my chest in a feeble attempt to get my body from going into some sort of cardiac arrest. Glancing around the dark room, I remembered that I was _safe._ Or, much rather, as safe as I could be. The body sleeping next to me proved that much to be true, and as I moved to sneak out of the other woman's bed, I whispered a soft apology.

God, how I hated to be a burden to the white haired angel I had befriended. _She barely sleeps anymore because of me._ I tried shaking my head, as if that would rid the idea from my head, and although I know it was pointless, I couldn't have helped it. Tears that I hadn't noticed were there in the first place began to fall from my eyes, and almost immediately I was trying to stifle sobs with my pillow.

"Why won't you j-just let-t me f-forg-get?" I hated it. Hated it so much, and no matter what I did, it was always there. A soft knock on our door had my gaze shooting upwards towards it. Who could possibly be there during these early morning hours? Hikari stirred in her sleep, and I quickly darted to the door, hoping that perhaps it wasn't anybody at all, and I was just hearing things. My hand that rested against the cool metal knob was shaking, quivering with something I was unsure of. Perhaps it was fear of who was behind the entrance, or perhaps it was shaking from before...I wouldn't know.

"Hello?" I muttered as quietly as possible, making sure to never break contact with my feet.

"Tsuki-chan?" My head shot up and standing before me was the orange masked good boy that I had grown to love, in a sense.

"A-ah...T-tob-bi-k-kun..." I offered him a weak smile, and he enveloped his arms around me, to give me a rather large hug.

"Tobi came to check on Tsuki because Hikari told Tobi that sometimes Tsuki wakes up from nightmares." He tilted my head up with his thumb and pointer finger underneath my chin, and then, let out a childish gasp. "Is Tsuki-chan okay? Tsu-Tsu looks like she was crying! What can Tobi do? Tobi is a good boy!" I allowed a much more realistic smile touch my lips at his words.

"I'm f-fine. Arig-gat-tou..." He pulled on my hand excitedly; so that I would leave the room with him, and I couldn't help but to wonder if he ever ran out of his seemingly boundless energy...Did Tobi ever sleep?

"Tsu-Tsu-chan is going to come in Tobi's room with Tobi. So Tobi can keep watch and make sure there are no more bad dreams! Tobi'll beat them all up with his trusty pillow!" If I could see he face, I would be sure he was grinning underneath his mask. A blush crept onto my face however. I had only ever shared a room with Sasuke-kun, and Itachi-san. Well...there was this one other time, but it didn't end very well.

And what about the other night? Would things continue? Would I actually let Tobi go farther?

_If you do, you're a stupid whore._

_ Really. But I suppose if that's what you would like, be my guest. _

_ Just gives me something else to fuck with you._

I bit my lip as the tears started to flow again, and I gripped onto Tobi's hand as hard as I could. He paused, and glanced down back at me. I could sense the concern coming from his aura, and it felt as if he was most certainly frowning.

"What's wrong Tsuki-chan?" I wanted him to make me feel better...

"It-t...it-t won't-t leave... I c-can't-t..." I looked up at him with the saddest, most pathetic expression I'm sure ever came across my features. Tobi's fingers squeezed mine gently, in a comforting gesture, and his voice came out in a smooth whisper.

"It's in your head, isn't it?" A startled gasp left my lips as he pinpointed exactly what had plagued me since my childhood. Looking towards the ground with a dejected gaze, I nodded slowly, and felt him pull me along. "Don't worry," His sultry tone soothed, "I'll make it better." I didn't know how he planned to make me feel any better; I doubted he had any knowledge of mental illnesses, or whatever the fuck it was that was in my head, but who knew. It was Tobi, and he was very unpredictable.

I was led down the hallway, a turn to the left, and a flight of stairs, all shrouded in deep mysterious darkness—save for the occasional flickering candle light. I remember hearing something about that man Kakuzu stating that there was no reason to leave the hall lights on all night, as it was a "waste of electricity", and that we were "damned ninja; if we needed to go into the halls for whatever reason, we should use our abilities to their fullest." It still scared me though. Darkness wasn't ever really a friend of mine, and I knew that unless I died, we never would be.

Finally, however, I was tugged through a door, which I expected was Tobi's, and then left by the opening, as his hand disappeared from mine. Immediately, my hand flew to my chest, to fiddle with the collar of my shirt, nervously, and my eyes darted around frantically, searching. For nothing in particular, either...just...searching. My heart was pounding in my chest, my ears, my throat and my head, making a deafening, terrifying noise in my ear that seemed unnatural.

_Go away please..._

Tobi's room wasn't at all what I expected. I figured it would have been messy, strewn with games, and toys, children's books and novels, and clothes. I pictured it bright, and cheery, with highlighter yellow and Pumpkin orange walls. Of course, this all sprouted from the visage that Tobi had shown. However, instead of the children's playroom theme, Tobi's room was simple, dark, and organized. The walls were _painted_ a deep maroon colour, and the ceiling was black. His bed was—as opposed to a small little race car bed—a grand four poster king, complete with the sheer curtains that hung from the top railing, and were strewn to the sides with black ribbon. His comforter and the curtains were also a crimson, while his pillows, sheets and railings were black. He had a desk to one wall, and a large towering bookcase that took up the entire wall on the opposite. I noticed a few pieces of paper on the desk were astray, and there was a towel hanging off the back of the chair there, but otherwise, it was spotless.

"Do you like it?" The deep voice that permeated my eardrums from behind had me momentarily startled, my body freezing on instinct. I took in a few hyperventilated breaths, before nodding shakily. Why did he have that effect on me? "I'm glad. You may move onto the bed if you'd like." He breathed out, fingers on my hips to guide me forward towards the large bed. M y feet made soft thuds against the light coloured carpet, and eventually, I stopped, my fingertips brushing against the delicate down comforter.

"Soft-t..." I murmured under my breath. He must've heard me however, because he began to chuckle. My eyes shut closed and I willed the pain in my head to go away.

_Please...Don't laugh at me._

_ Don't hate me._

I was scared Tobi wouldn't want to talk to me anymore because I had made that stupid comment. I was scared that he would look down on me. God, why was I so stupid? A whimper left lips that parted just slightly enough to let the sound out; tears threatened to leak out of magenta eyes that couldn't decide if they wanted to stay that colour of fade to a saddened, sullen green.

"Tsuki, it's okay." He murmured, caressing my bare stomach, as my pyjama shorts rode low, and the matching shirt cut just above my belly button. "I told you I'd make it better, didn't I?" His words made my heart beat faster. I opened my eyes, just a tad, to allow myself to safely fall to his bed.

Tobi followed after me, wrapping his arms protectively around my waist. His mask was still on, hiding his eyes from my view, but, at the same time, was lifted up just enough for me to see the soft curve of his lips, as he leaned in closer, and let a soft breath out. I blinked, unsure of what to do at his close proximity, then blushed a bright shade of red.

_ Go ahead, you stupid cunt._

_ Fuck the lying bastard._

_ Go on, you know you want too._

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I parted my lips to speak, only to have his press against mine greedily, moulding perfectly to my own in a domineering kiss.

Good gods, what was I in for...

* * *

_**I can't wait for the next chapter, yeah?**_

_**What'd'ya think is gonna happen? *insert suggestive eyebrow wiggle***_

_**Leave your comments and ideas in the reviews! Okay?**_

_**I love ya'll 3**_

_**~Mariah Love**_


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